nice to hear some new murph, voice sounds amazing as usual!💖

def leave me with some the story so far vibes 🥰

guitar by @prodjpjp
prod me
lyrics

im eating her bodyweight no, i know that you hate my face. bro
neck it down w a slice of cake yo, lets hold back from tainting grace, hoe
stomach thin w a feint of shake woah, she grows back but cant stay, loyal

im curious by the way that he touch you
im destroying us by the weight of my bad mood
im enjoying us, everyday is so bad dude
depression getting worse, i cant even leave my home dude
do i deserve this bad, i swear that i want to hold you
ur all i never had, i swear to god that i told you
does he want you back, as much as i do
i guess i like, i guess i like you

im eating her bodyweight, laying down as i deflate
where are you now, as i replay
deep in the ground is my only space
where are you now, i got something to say
i live in hell its the only way
i couldent tell that i need your face
locked in a cell and its called my place
how can you tell that i need a razor;
the trees when i stepback feels like safest place
if i see your guy ima stomp on his face
are you alright im not scared to embrace
whats that from your eye, get those slits of your face

cake

guitar played by @user-374890447

lyrics:
what do you know about this
what do you know about this
oh what do you know about this
I'm sick of saying that I'm okay

I'm sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i pray it don't
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but im all alone
im sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i pray it don't
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone

say what u done to me
you open me gave me misery
you blow out the candle as i set it alight
fate wasn't kind to me
your over me were history
into someone else
erases every part of me

I'm sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i pray it don't
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
I'm sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i prey it don't
i wanna leave but im all alone
i wanna leave but im all alone
i wanna leave but im all alone

anxiety

prod by me
enjoy<3

lyrics:
i wish i weren't so kind to people i dont know
they step all over me got dirt all on my throat
and as the time flies by i think that i might choke
this rope it follows me, it follows far from home
these bones have yet to see the depth of all these trees
this forest i will go, its right beside the creek
ill meet you here again when time passes you by
ill wait for you instead of passing on my life

as i walked thru the green of the spruce i heard your laughter
please tell me to stop im afraid of the after
every time i talk it just feels like it don't matter
every time i walk i feel my bones slowly fracture
why does everybody use me then just push me aside?
babe is there a reason you cant look in my eyes?
i cant talk to anybody, not even my closest
so i had to ask myself why do i even try?

if only you would focus 
(it gets hard)
then you could see what matters most
its not that hard to notice that you've been talking to a ghost

im losing my damn mind man everyone just acts the same
you cant tell me how to feel, please dont tell me its okay
you ain my friend you ain my bro so i don't care bout what you say
i do this shit all by myself while you sit back and waste the day
my throat is getting tight, it's so hard for me to speak
these woods are dark till dawn, so how could i even see
in the morning when you come looking for me don't be surprised if you find my body hanging by the creek

by the creek

spotify

ｔｈｅ　ｐｒｅｓｅｎｔ　ｍｅ　ｉｓ　ｊｕｓｔ　ａ　ｌｏｏｓｅ　ｅｎｄ

love all of you guys seriously so much.
this is the only thing  i ever want to do, and your support helps push me to continue with all of this; i would regardless, but i'm grateful to no ends for whatever kind of reception is given back. things have been seriously difficult as of late, and so all i can say is thank you for being here. thank you for listening.
shit's kinda cliche when i say that, but that cliche shit is true sometimes, and i mean it; whatever. thank you 
just the beginning 

prod @cartermetro & @vito2300 

you left (you left)
i crashed (i crashed)
now all we ever had is in the past
(it's all in the past)
i'll stay (away)
detached (from that)
until the very moment i collapse

something ain't feeling too right
losing my sight; bloodshot irises
the people i love ain't alike
give it some time, maybe my view will shift
it's always whenever you're right, they put up a fight
but i couldn't give a shit
hammered down any spite, bring out the knife
lying outside again

and my notes are filled with solutions,
that you might consider delusion
the old me is buried in ruins
the present me is just a loose end
turned off the phone for monochrome daydreams
'cause i don't give a shit if i'm wavy
i mean look at what happened to davy

making a point to you's crazy
crissin' it 'cross like an apple, how tasty
stuck in a drench, while i'm soaking in sweat
more or less i'm expecting nobody to save me
pokemon quest on the blue 2DS
nowadays i'm a wreck, and i stench what i'm craving
heart full of rust,
when the musk fermentates in my chest you can leave what you're hating

i got a pain in my neck, can't stretch it
the hurt in my voice can't be heard over message
so let's make a break where we got no connections
only direction, never perfection
when i talk to the sky, it'll always rain hail
bulimia fucking me up 'till i'm well
"the truth doesn't sell"
leave me for dead with the dread in my head and no breath to inhale

004, blunt force on the baby
there ain't a lure with the potent to save me
getting by as a passerby,
keeping lowered eyes, i'm already hazy
not that i'm lazy,
just marinating in lost time they never gave me
i'm short on breath, should i recollect
or detach, while i'm still straining
i hate that when i fall back into relapse
it's me i'm saving
what a nuisance, when i do this
you're clueless about what i'm saying
so, deuces, 'cause few stick when the roof lifts
i'm sick of waiting
got mucus on my blue lips
from fucked shit i feel on the daily

something ain't feeling too right
losing my sight; bloodshot irises
the people i love ain't alike
give it some time, maybe my view will shift
it's always whenever you're right, they put up a fight
why should i give a shit
hammered down any spite, brought in the knife
i wanna die again

my heart's open
why is my heart open
quick, gotta close it
quick, gotta close it

collapse [prod. cxrter x vito]

You should kill me, kill me, kill me
Not the real me, real me, real me
I don’t see him
Breathing, breathing
You don’t need him, need him, need him oh
And I always think about you when im sitting in the dark
Swear I feel your breath putting pressure on my arm
But what the fuck do I know
Im sat here waiting for some truth to be told

Better, know you could be wetter
Pussy so bad he pulled a weapon
My love I don’t know what you’re selling
Too bad im bought in descension

Oh god I don’t know what to get
Two minds im not losing again
What the fuck you think you’re doing in bed
I look away and now you’re fucking again

bought in descension 

This must be the end of everything that I know
Her nails are cutting marks into the back of my throat
No matter how much I clean it won’t go
Fuck you never call me your bro

You don’t give a fuck, you don’t give a fuck
I thought you had a question
Am I not good enough?
Given up now, given up
I let my guard down
Ive had enough

youre moving backwards 
give me some time, 
gimme me some space to relax love
You don’t want that
Feeling pressure around my neck love
im going fast
Imma turn my car right 
just to call it a crash
I can see you going down 
but you didnt ask
You don’t wanna try 
bitch you never have
Ruining a life that you never had
let him knock you up just to get me back
Fucking tapped

Descension

watch the leaves fall on my legs 
as i wait and let the time pass
seasons go my life's still a mess
why did i put my life in both ur hands?

fading away disappearing fast
all of ur love for me like a crash
why did this happen is this a test?
i hate u for making me hate myself

im cutting my wrists breaking my bones
stuck in my head, stuck in my home
laying awake all night long
lookin at u thru my phone
lonely everyday i do the same
sit on my chair and i rot away
while i keep dreamin bout u 
and the way u were dressed that day
im cutting my wrists breaking my bones
stuck in my head, stuck in my home
laying awake all night long
lookin at u thru my phone
lonely everyday i do the same
sit on my chair and i rot away
while i keep dreamin bout u 
and the way u were dressed that day

don't even bother callin my phone
i changed my number and im goin ghost
i hate the life and the way it goes
im well today but tomorrow nobody knows
different drinks, cigs and a bloody nose
that's the way the sad ones roll
losing track, of how many tracks, 
i pulled of doing song after song
song after song
tens in a row 
and im losing control
losing compusure 
destroying my soul
im just hopin that in peace i will go 
cuz~

im cutting my wrists breaking my bones
stuck in my head, stuck in my home
laying awake all night long
lookin at u thru my phone
lonely everyday i do the same
sit on my chair and i rot away
while i keep dreamin bout u 
and the way u were dressed that day

cutting my wrists, breaking my bones (young taylor)

𝙞 𝙜𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙮 𝙩𝙚𝙚𝙩𝙝 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙞 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠 𝙤𝙛 𝙞𝙩 𝙣𝙤𝙬
prod. kais
shoutout to https://soundcloud.com/lilskeleskrrt & https://soundcloud.com/heylog for getting on this with me <3

lyrics:
(kais)
don't look back at that house
I grind my teeth when I think of it now.
took all I had to make you proud
now all I see is your face as I'm bound.

(skele)
ooooo
there’s nobody here 
anymore 
look around
oh i wanted 
to feel 
you breaking down 
grab my throat 
need to feel something 
blood soaked house 
it won’t let me leave
scars won’t show 
but i feel them bleed 
n if i don’t choke 
would you be proud of 
me 
of me

(heylog)
don't look back at me
forget everything
hearing high-pitched rings
hanging by a string
I look up
what have I become?
oh god, you tell me to run
rooftops hidden by the snow
every limb appears white
and your body sits and glows
it glows

(kais, skele, & heylog)
don't look back at that house
I grind my teeth when I think of it now.
took all I had to make you proud
now all I see is your face as I'm bound.

bound

bound w/skele & heylog

hope u enjoy this one :)

prod: Noah Birch
mixed, mastered, written and recorded by me

LYRICS:
Don’t go without me
But you left, so suddenly
Control freak
Is all you see in me 

But I’m more
Just give me more
Let me show you
Just what I can do
Before you go

Replace
The memories I had of you, with someone else
Erase 
Every thought of you that I held
Can’t just let you waste inside my mind 
And I ain’t staying in tonight
Wash away the sins inside
Cover up what I try to hide
What’s the point of this shitty life
(Oh-oh)
Why do I still try to fight 
(No-oh)
Myself I’ll never find

(We haven’t talked and I think we should)

And I know it’s time to get my life in check
Get back to the way I once was before 
But I’m scared of what comes next
Staying clear of the edge, I’m afraid I might fall
And I know that you won’t catch me
You say you will, but you lie, ain’t there when I call

Control freak
(Freak, freak, freak)
Is all you see in me

But I’m more
Just give me more
Let me show you
Just what I can do
Before you go

Second to last song for the year, its been an awesome one thanks so much. have a good rest of 2023 loveu <#

control freak

things i held
im dying to go but she holds me in place i wont run
and when i arrive at heavens gates, will you know me

you think about me ?
cause im dying to know if you still care
held by my feelings 
im holding them bare

caught in a forest and then a landslide got to me
fields of rosesim pissing blood out of my arteries
so i can be with you, im counting leafs
im in a field ive got my head in the trees

i keep hearing voices theyre not coming out
yeah
i keep tryna hide but they keep coming round
tryna build a wall and keep myself out
but you wont recognise me not myself now

give him back to me
take somebody else
give him back to me
take somebody else

dont talk about my problems like you have none
my addiction only spiked because i lost someone
when im next, dont act like you care
treated like a joke you know its not fair

put yourself in my position, wouldnt last a week
and all this time that i have, i do not care to eat
i sorta feel like nobodys aware of me
it sorta feels like, none of you could care for me

take the shit from back and what i wear
take the food from my stomach and strip me bare
take everything that i own
i wouldnt care
and its still never enough and thats not fair

give him back to me
take somebody else

take somebody else

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83Bd5PWLwBA

[prod. jpjp & deadfish]

i'm geist:
a broken design
step aside and rewind
but time doesn't seem to heal
the body's inside
and the blood is on your hands
so don't tell me that this isn't real

it's not the same, no
tell me where did my mind go?
cause i seem to have lost control
why won't the pain go?
i swear i've waited the time love
but i can't seem to take anymore

so say can i save myself now?
(envy) i think it's far too late you'll drown
but i need them to hear me out
(envy) don't make a sound just shut your mouth

notenvy:
my frame is fractured like kaleidoscope
the only sense of matters left my brain
i swear i'm losing hope
i’m doing fine, oh you don't want to know
the shit that i've been going through
i'm gripping on, i've lost control
another day intoxicated
do you ever think of me
my structure’s slowly breaking
another breath is wasted
screaming from my chest
i fucking wish someone would save me

kais:
i hate it when you talk to me, but talk to me some more
hands to my ears and my face to the floor
love it when they lie to me, so lie to me some more
you fucked me up and put me through the ground
scream for help, but it never makes a sound
you took it wrong, I didnt mean it that way
silent with the pressure, but I let it stay
imma let it till it breaks me
down, I know you want me here but I never come around
im sorry and I owe you that. that’s what this shits about
I walk slow with my teeth glued to my mouth
I don’t talk cus the rooms always too loud
loud
loud

deadfish:
and i'm waking up
heart's fucking numb
it's only 7am
but I can't seem to lay down

anxious bout the day
what's gonna happen today
I just can't get a break
everything's still the same

mind is racing if today you're gon reply to me
nothing points to that but I'll wait just in case

if u had a change of mind
blood is pouring out my eyes
phone is charged all the time
cause I'm waiting for

for you to reply
please stop wasting my time
it just wasn't enough
and I can't make up my mind

you said that nothing has changed
but I don't feel the same
but I am keen to believe cause I'm
just hopeless

funeral:
i get so deep in this shit and i'll never get out
now i'm stuck and i'm waiting
i never think i just act and i ask if i'll make it
or maybe i'm wasting
my time right here, right now
blood leak, blood flow, lights low, lights out

it's way too obvious to me
the way the bodies dust, i bleed
i need one second alone now
one shot, now i'm dead, body goes down

sewerperson:
rust gives way to the chains that hold me
for yesterday could not control me
toxins permeate
the armoured skin that covers me
u poor man ur final day
is ended here from under me
woah bring out the big guns
im in the mood to erase something
huh just try to say something
u getting face fucked
blunt getting laced up
put u in swamp water face up
no matter the chaos faced
i wouldn’t give up
for time will tell
of better days
from here I smell
the autumn rainfall
it helps me stay strong

SPOTIFY

time will tell w/ i'm geist, notenvy, kais, deadfish, funeral, sewerperson

instrumental; B-side to "Cobwebs" single.

control freak

B MURPH (@bmurphxo)

Recent comments

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ｃｒｙｃ

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