⋆los♱ in a sta♱e of mind⋆

magnets

hostile

why am i still wide awake
i can hear in your voice youre still irate
ive got too much on my plate
but ill js shut up n stuff my face
i realized its pointless to try again
walk away from me n go on to talk to your friends
i dont know why u tried making amends
i hope that one day all my suffering will end

go stream!

stuff my face till im sick of eating

@ankleankle
@six-days-after-christmas
@i-wanna-be-a-jack-o-later

i guess every time you close your eyes
you see me standing right beside you
brush your hair from morning on
wipe your skin til your tears are gone
i guess everyone just fucking hates you
shattered words will end and break you
cry to me while you sing along
look at me while you get it wrong

say what you said i heard you
i known you for a long time so i cant hurt you
and i dont want you feeling like im not okay
i tried to leave but not again
looking at the ceiling of my room
im pondering im missing you
thinking of our conversations
i cant even think of things to do
you wanted me to stay but i dont wanna see it through
rather be by myself but everytime i close my eyes im seeing you

close your eyes w ankle

p. quin

im a greedy bastard
dont know if i should ask her
if this shit could go faster
it almost was a disaster
i seal my heart with plaster
happily ever afters dont exist
your lips are not the only thing i miss
my love
your smile
your eyes
your laugh
ive got a list
your touch
we never kissed or cuddled enough
im tired of feeling like this
was i just another
for me you were my lover
no i cant find another
because you held me under

sometimes i pray you don't wake up

you don’t seem to worry bout me
claimin’ you got nuthin else to say
i can’t stand that all my feelings relay
but the memories flood my head everyd-

you don’t seem to worry bout me
claimin’ you got nuthin else to say
I can’t stand that all my feelings relay
but the memories flood my head everyd-

(i) don’t feel like myself
keep causin me problems, get out my cell
she took all the words straight out my mouth
you heard all my issues but you’re no help

say that she love me, i know she lyin to me
she ain’t stayin solid, i know she’s lyin to me
im losin my sanity, baby don’t ya see
you must’ve lost ya mind crawlin back to me

you tugged at my heart strings, heart my soul
i just need to be at peace, no control
ask if ill ever be happy, i don’t know

get the fuck out my face

i hope these words cut deep

i want your mind, can it break right through?
can you gimme a chance to stare at you?
just one last time, you gotta hear it
it’s our last dance before we're through

i want your mind, can it break right through?
can you gimme a chance to stare at you?
just one last time, you gotta hear it
it’s our last dance before we're through

you weren't mine, but that's okay
and it broke my heart that you couldn't stay
just one last time, you gotta hear it
there’s so much that i couldn't say

i want your mind, can it break right through?
can you give me a chance to stare at you?
just onе last time, you gotta hear it
it’s our last dance bеfore we're through

i want your mind, can it break right through?
can you gimme a chance to stare at you?
just one last time before you hear it

i miss u and im at this point in my life cvr

baby do i fit into your schedule for once
(i) cope wit how u treated me by taking these drugs
every word that leaves your mouth gives me goosebumps
look at who you’re hanging around
(i) feel nun but disgust
your inner circle makes my skin crawl
wish i knew you were heartless
you dont feel at all
my mind’s been clouded, i think you’re involved
im better off bangin my head on this wall

your inner circle makes my skin crawl

@crawlingunderyourskin
im tryna block my ears
tryna get rid of this noise oh
now i look at my peers
jealous of all this success oh
i can never do right
she tryna give me signs
now when i go cry
she wanna give me the side eye

@ripouturmolarsforme
i wipe my tears, off of my face
drenched in my sorrows
and you wont look my way
don't love myself, so my wrists will bleed
you deserve hell for what you did to me

@crawlingunderyourskin
i dont want to
fight no more
im so sick of
this fucking whore
im just tryna leave the nest
im just tryna do my best
im just tryna get out oh
im tryna prove the rest

@ripouturmolarsforme
let's put us to the test
your love infects me
she'll move onto the next
don't even care to text me
i hate havin to struggle
but you trapped me in your bubble

@crawlingunderyourskin
im tryna block my ears
tryna get rid of this noise oh
now i look at my peers
jealous of all this success oh
i can never do right
she tryna give me signs
now when i go cry
she wanna give me the side eye

im tryna block my ears, nauseous

https://open.spotify.com/track/2AIMz1yFQSTO7E0Hbh5Q6s?si=NSZ2Tck2Sp6qQe6lrRXbXg&context=spotify%3Aalbum%3A04w5f3YMAtRZknzgxzVjuc

prod me

take it easy
u expect too much from me
im just tryna love
didnt know this is how u feel
i still imagine finding hairs
all across my room
reminiscing on the scent
of u

i cant believe it
ur lies that im seein
ur hurtin, i see it
thru the curtains
of ur theatre

theatre of lies

https://open.spotify.com/track/5deqRcXhpxot443g7emMy0?si=NydICEOaRk296K4txYVwGA&context=spotify%3Aalbum%3A4rUhH7hSpj0Sk41NFYbvYi

prod me ft @revivle

@requiem-for-you
what did i even do wrong?
was it what i wrote about u in my song
where did i even go wrong?
why wont u just tell me i dont wanna see u gone

cold winter nights
spent alone
used to sit by the fire on the phone
drinking hot cocoa
looking at our old photos
turning time into slowmo
where did it go wrong?

(where did i go wrong
dont wanna see u gone)

what did i even do wrong?
was it what i wrote about u in my song
where did i even go wrong?
why wont u just tell me i dont wanna see u gone

@revivle
i spent so much time on my own
i couldnt stop you from letting me go
so many promises that you went and broke
if i killed myself then how would you know ;p

im sorry for acting the way that i did
theres just something about u that makes me feel like a kid
im calling out for you i just wish you could see it
maybe u would if you stopped fucking leaving

@requiem-for-you + @revivle
what did i even do wrong?
was it what i wrote about u in my song
where did i even go wrong?
why wont u just tell me i dont wanna see u gone
x2

what did i do wrong? w/ revivle

bipolar

https://open.spotify.com/track/5rFqazROwCjEN83I91xFHW?si=72a9658bf5e54163

prod me ft @revivle ...again ^_^

@requiem-for-you
oooh
baby whatchu do
i dont have a clue
cus im not rlly one to listen
you
broke my heart in two
it never regrew
now im jus cold and heartless

u never said bye to me
im so anxious im biting
my nails ill gnaw my skin
till i can feel something

@revivle
late night talks
i could talk to you for hours baby
you dont listen to me
break my heart and call me crazy
i know i cant play these games
talk to me like whys that so hard
i just wanna feel something
got a past that im not proud of

gave it all that i could
(blame it all on me)
i cant leave but i should 
(i cant seem to stop)

stop myself from texting you again
maybe we were better off as friends
wondering when the lyings gonna end
baby whachu....

@requiem-for-you + @revivle
oooh
baby whatchu do
i dont have a clue
cus im not rlly one to listen
you
broke my heart in two
it never regrew
now im jus cold and heartless

u never said bye to me
im so anxious im biting
my nails ill gnaw my skin
till i can feel something
x2

heartless w/ revivle

produced by me

can’t pass the time, youre in my dreams
and now i know ill never sleep
do i stay and try to fix it all for her
I’m such a joke because I know that I’ll get hurt 

I know you’re sleeping
hold me tight I can’t see 
you in my dreams
you in my dreams
love me simply
hold me right I know you
can’t feel happy
can’t feel happy

so I’ll sing my songs
will you sing along
will you sing along
but you can’t

I know you’re sleeping
hold me tight I can’t see 
you in my dreams
you in my dreams
love me simply
hold me right I know you
can’t feel happy
can’t feel happy

i know youre sleeping

prod me
cover art by benjahmen

i said all the things that i wanted to say
held it in everyday
hold so close hand on your face
when i thought it was perfect
and nothing could change
(im getting tired of talkin, i told you it was your turn now)

i was here 
left my mark on the wall
i have a question my dear
will you catch me when i fall
i was here 
left my mark on the wall
i have a question my dear
did it mean anything at all
ima show the art im makin
all the pictures that im paintin
all the fishes in the sea 
drink up the water when its rainin 
but they have what they crave
they drownin over nothin
its right in they face
no i hope

i built a rocket ship
so i could fly away
out of embarrassment
no i hope
got scared you would hurt me soon so i
took my passion with me to the moon

im getting tired of talking and talking and talking again
cause i said it was your turn no
i feel so
fucked up inside
i cant go
go back this time

i was here 
left my mark on the wall
i have a question my dear
will you catch me when i fall
i was here 
left my mark on the wall
i have a question my dear
did it mean anything at all

i hate your guts i hate the way you talk
i want you dead up on the floor i want you gone

i said all the things that i wanted to say
held it in everyday
hold so close hand on your face
when i thought it was perfect
and nothing could change
(3x)

STOP STOP THIS IS NOTHING DONT LOOK HERE

i think theres magnets
in my cereal
because i feel so attracted
when you sit so close
and your just so damn attractive 
i cant feel my bones
and it drives me into madness
when i smell your clothes
(fuck)

im drenched in your love
and it feels so damn great
come and tell me all the things that you hate
and the things that you love
hope its me
hope its me
yeah its gotta be

my hearts poured out like gore
love when you talk tell me more
i wanna hear all your lore
show me what you got in store
(2x)
let all my bones drop to the floor
your loves something i cant ignore
and ill let my heart pour 
until it cant no more
(2x)

i think theres magnets
in my cereal
because i feel so attracted
when you sit so close
and your just so damn attractive 
i cant feel my bones
and it drives me into madness
when i smell your clothes
(fuck)

im drenched in your love
and it feels so damn great
come and tell me all the things that you hate
and the things that you love
hope its me
hope its me
yeah its gotta be

NOTHING DONT PAY ATTENTION TO THIS ONE.

these apartment walls are paper-thin
and i'd love to break out, but i'm still cornered in
(make it) easier for me, won't you quiet down?
(easy) 'cause when i'm tryna sleep, i hear every sound
(for me) i'm the only one hearing it somehow
(it's so) hard for me to fall asleep when it's so loud