⋆los♱ in a sta♱e of mind⋆

am i falling in love?
are we something or not?
i can tell something's wrong in my head
am i dead?
use your words of affection and lies to reflect it again
again

tell me what i'm waiting here for
any time they'll blow through that door
put it to my head,
put it to my
bullet through my head

she said that she's tired of this nonsense
tell me where i'm lost at
don't know where i started at
why's it so hard on us
tell me what's your purpose
just tell me it all
girl tell me i'm worthless
i deserve my scars

reflect

bae if i fall would you, pick me up?
i hear voices all around me, am i not enough?
be the clover for me, if i run out of luck
(you don't even care)

is there somebody else?
do you even want me at all?
feeling unwell, i hope you don't leave me to rot
(it replays in my head)

im a loser, i'm not pretty at all
for my flesh, rip it off
i've succomb to my thoughts
i just wanna die

nothing matters at all
outta words, for a loss
all the things i would i do
for a grasp at your heart
just defile my arms
carve your name in my skin
so i bleed for my sins

oh i need it, i need it, i need you

clover

i hate everything and everyone around me
tear my skin apart, i hate my flaws
like why'd you ever doubt me
and i'll figure it out, you hold the revolver
don't take a bullet out, she aimed right down & shot me

i'd end up like this regardless
i know i'm a loser but, i'll end up fine

i'd end up like this regardless

@ankleankle
@six-days-after-christmas
@i-wanna-be-a-jack-o-later

i guess every time you close your eyes
you see me standing right beside you
brush your hair from morning on
wipe your skin til your tears are gone
i guess everyone just fucking hates you
shattered words will end and break you
cry to me while you sing along
look at me while you get it wrong

say what you said i heard you
i known you for a long time so i cant hurt you
and i dont want you feeling like im not okay
i tried to leave but not again
looking at the ceiling of my room
im pondering im missing you
thinking of our conversations
i cant even think of things to do
you wanted me to stay but i dont wanna see it through
rather be by myself but everytime i close my eyes im seeing you

close your eyes w ankle

niggas talkin bout a send off
me and ur bitch ran off
why u say she ran thru
baby that is not cool
feeling like a phantom
bae we in a phantom 
not a wraith yeah we in the phantom
dont matter what i say cos i know u cant stand it
ok bae know u cant stand it 
she say try this innuendo
yeah u better get gone yeah u better get lost
yeah you is a lost cause
they really cannot stop moi
yeah ur bitch got her arms tied around moi
and they know yeah
yeah u know i won
getting too high bitch u know im too stunned
and she fine shi and she know i need her now
domo wallet and it make her go woah, yeah
niggas talkin bout a send off
me and ur bitch ran off
why u say she ran thru
baby that is not cool
feeling like a phantom
bae we in a phantom 
not a wraith yeah we in the phantom
dont matter what i say cos i know u cant stand it
ok bae know u cant stand it 
niggas talkin bout a send off
me and ur bitch ran off
why u say she ran thru
baby that is not cool
feeling like a phantom
bae we in a phantom 
not a wraith yeah we in the phantom
dont matter what i say cos i know u cant stand it
ok bae know u cant stand it 
feeling like a phantom
bae we in a phantom 
not a wraith yeah we in the phantom

spotify

goodbyeee prod owen s

lyrics : 

just wanna hear ur voice one more time
its too late now why didnt i get the signs
your voice echoes in my sleep
your face echoes in my dreams
why arent u next to me
why arent u next to me
i just heard awful news
i might tie up the noose
i might go on my way
i just dont know what to do
yeah i know its no use
im just thinking of you
im so high and confused
tell me why
you do what you do
tell me why
you do what you do
just wanna hear ur voice one more time
its too late now why didnt i get the signs
your voice echoes in my sleep
your face echoes in my dreams
why arent u next to me
why arent u next to me
i just heard awful news
i might tie up the noose
i might go on my way
i just dont know what to do

awful news demo by bluecat

https://open.spotify.com/track/2AIMz1yFQSTO7E0Hbh5Q6s?si=NSZ2Tck2Sp6qQe6lrRXbXg&context=spotify%3Aalbum%3A04w5f3YMAtRZknzgxzVjuc

prod me

take it easy
u expect too much from me
im just tryna love
didnt know this is how u feel
i still imagine finding hairs
all across my room
reminiscing on the scent
of u

i cant believe it
ur lies that im seein
ur hurtin, i see it
thru the curtains
of ur theatre

theatre of lies

https://open.spotify.com/track/5deqRcXhpxot443g7emMy0?si=NydICEOaRk296K4txYVwGA&context=spotify%3Aalbum%3A4rUhH7hSpj0Sk41NFYbvYi

prod me ft @revivle

@requiem-for-you
what did i even do wrong?
was it what i wrote about u in my song
where did i even go wrong?
why wont u just tell me i dont wanna see u gone

cold winter nights
spent alone
used to sit by the fire on the phone
drinking hot cocoa
looking at our old photos
turning time into slowmo
where did it go wrong?

(where did i go wrong
dont wanna see u gone)

what did i even do wrong?
was it what i wrote about u in my song
where did i even go wrong?
why wont u just tell me i dont wanna see u gone

@revivle
i spent so much time on my own
i couldnt stop you from letting me go
so many promises that you went and broke
if i killed myself then how would you know ;p

im sorry for acting the way that i did
theres just something about u that makes me feel like a kid
im calling out for you i just wish you could see it
maybe u would if you stopped fucking leaving

@requiem-for-you + @revivle
what did i even do wrong?
was it what i wrote about u in my song
where did i even go wrong?
why wont u just tell me i dont wanna see u gone
x2

what did i do wrong? w/ revivle

lyrics:

said i miss your cigarette
leak blood and your wrists sore
it's not over yet

aww
i'm addicted too
i still stalk your page
i'm a creep for you

blades
tears
cuts
deep in my
skin
skin
i'll let ya meet the pistol
don't think i'll ever miss ya, right
now you're all crippled
crop you out the picture
blades
tears
cuts
deep in my
skin
skin
skin
skin
skin
skin

leave you with your wrists bloody
won't you let me pull it out of you
hate it all of the sudden
something i cant ever stomach
even if i ever could
i dont wanna fall apart
lord knows i ever should

then you'll meet the rifle
nothing left to cry for
wasn't my fault
now you're all gone
aww

blades
tears
cuts
deep in my
skin
skin
i'll let ya meet the pistol
don't think i'll ever miss ya, right
now you're all crippled
crop you out the picture
blades
tears
cuts
deep in my
skin
skin
skin
skin
skin
skin

skin

blood, guts & gore

lucille - point blank range

lucille - insane

till next time.

It's been a day without the light
And I feel fine
Oh, I'm better than ever, really
Stepping outside and now I
Feel like my head is spinning off

But it's the game I play
It's my only way
That I can escape this place
Every minute of every day
As soon as you're in it, it never would change
There's no way to fix it, I'm going insane
And no one will listen to me
Maybe I'm in a mood

When I walk away I feel it following me everyday
It peels my open by my cuts, my wounds
My scars are solid but they're still there and show me in every way
And they know it so why don't they say my name?
When I opened they bought it and threw away
'Cause you know when it's cloudy; expect the rain
They tell me it's nothing but it's never what they show

But it's the game I play
It's my only way
That I can escape this place
Every minute of every day
As soon as you're in it, it never would change
There's no way to fix it, I'm going insane
And no one will listen to me
Maybe I'm in a mood

Every minute of every day
As soon as you're in it, it never would change
There's no way to fix it, I'm going insane
And no one will listen to me
Maybe I'm in a mood

Now, does no apology make it right?
'Cause it sure might bark at me but won't bite
So I'll try to dine with the socialites
But they're all so perfect and I'm their vice
When they see me I'm sure that they stop and stare
Realize I'm being myself somewhere
They can judge me honestly; I don't care
'Cause when I'm up, they're down, it's a shame, we all gotta play a role

But it's the game I play
It's my only way
That I can escape this place
Every minute of every day
As soon as you're in it, it never would change
There's no way to fix it, I'm going insane
And no one will listen to me
Maybe I'm in a mood

grand mal

till next time.

The church ringing their bells
Music don't always help
But I can't stop; if I get a nine-to-five I'll
I'll prove my teachers right
Her friends will point and laugh
I hear my mother cry
I pray I can go

Back to when I wish I was older
'Cause now I fucking hate my life, I wish it was over
And you hate me as well
So what's the point of trying to stop me?
Leave me be. Oh, how I wanna go
Back to when I wish I was older
'Cause now I fucking hate my life, I wish it was over
And you hate me as well
So what's the point of trying to stop me?
Leave me be. Oh, how I wanna go

decue

3. reap what you sow (bunii)

4. so sorry (bunii)

https://open.spotify.com/track/5rFqazROwCjEN83I91xFHW?si=72a9658bf5e54163

prod me ft @revivle ...again ^_^

@requiem-for-you
oooh
baby whatchu do
i dont have a clue
cus im not rlly one to listen
you
broke my heart in two
it never regrew
now im jus cold and heartless

u never said bye to me
im so anxious im biting
my nails ill gnaw my skin
till i can feel something

@revivle
late night talks
i could talk to you for hours baby
you dont listen to me
break my heart and call me crazy
i know i cant play these games
talk to me like whys that so hard
i just wanna feel something
got a past that im not proud of

gave it all that i could
(blame it all on me)
i cant leave but i should 
(i cant seem to stop)

stop myself from texting you again
maybe we were better off as friends
wondering when the lyings gonna end
baby whachu....

@requiem-for-you + @revivle
oooh
baby whatchu do
i dont have a clue
cus im not rlly one to listen
you
broke my heart in two
it never regrew
now im jus cold and heartless

u never said bye to me
im so anxious im biting
my nails ill gnaw my skin
till i can feel something
x2

heartless w/ revivle

prod. lucille

oh god, i fear i'm way too involved
i put it all on the line
i'll be awaiting your call
said this shit a million times
guess you don't listen at all
i'll take a shot from your gun and blow my brains on the walls

i might just lose it for you baby
hold my hand
i'll be the loser for you maybe
in the end
i'll still be here when it gets crazy
god damn

i never seen this side of you
how do i get through
defiled, lie in you
and your cold
cold

shoot me dead
what's the point
a million rounds
fill the void
slay me down
kill the noise
watch it all fall down
paranoia

hate you
i wanna break you
i'm scared too
face you
i swear i'll find you
phase through
all your lies

oh god, i fear i'm way too involved
i put it all on the line
i'll be awaiting your call
said this shit a million times
guess you don't listen at all
i'll take a shot from your gun and blow my brains on the walls

i might just lose it for you baby
hold my hand
i'll be the loser for you maybe
in the end
i'll still be here when it gets crazy
god damn

i never seen this side of you
how do i get through
defiled, lie in you
and your cold
cold

shoot me dead
what's the point
a million rounds
fill the void
slay me down
kill the noise
watch it all fall down
paranoia

paranoia

lyrics:

waited a while, i don't see you around
life feels so unfamiliar, my heads in the clouds
oh i'd save you from hell if you wanted to salvage
the torture and torment that you left around

oh i, love you so
let it decay on my skin & bones
my head is plastered with you i know
(oh with you my darling)
so irrefutable
your scars are beautiful

you'll be my poison
ill be your cure
know death is certain
i'll be unsure
poke and pry, tears out my eyes
stab and lie, i'll be just fine

i hate the summer but winters alright
lost my purpose in spring, but in autumn it's perfect
i'm so damn demented, your closing the curtain
decline in my mental, i never was worth it

i still waited a while, i don't see you around
life feels so unfamiliar, my heads in the clouds
oh i'd save you from hell if you wanted to salvage
the torture and torment that you left around

oh i, love you so
let it decay on my skin & bones
my head is plastered with you i know
(oh with you my darling)
so irrefutable
your scars are beautiful

you'll be my poison
ill be your cure
know death is certain
i'll be unsure

you'll be my poison
ill be your cure
know death is certain
i'll be unsure

oh i, love you so
let it decay on my skin & bones
my head is plastered with you i know
(oh with you my darling)
so irrefutable
your scars are beautiful

you'll be my poison
ill be your cure
know death is certain
i'll be unsure

you'll be my poison
ill be your cure
know death is certain
i'll be unsure


unfamiliar

produced by me

can’t pass the time, youre in my dreams
and now i know ill never sleep
do i stay and try to fix it all for her
I’m such a joke because I know that I’ll get hurt 

I know you’re sleeping
hold me tight I can’t see 
you in my dreams
you in my dreams
love me simply
hold me right I know you
can’t feel happy
can’t feel happy

so I’ll sing my songs
will you sing along
will you sing along
but you can’t

I know you’re sleeping
hold me tight I can’t see 
you in my dreams
you in my dreams
love me simply
hold me right I know you
can’t feel happy
can’t feel happy

⋆los♱ in a sta♱e of mind⋆

YAESUOX