i come back to this song sometimes. great memories with this one

straight up listening to this song like 5 or 10 times a day 😅

You help a lot of people through your pain I appreciate you💙

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

SINGLE OFF THE ALBUM
'BITTER BLUE'

prod: https://soundcloud.com/nothingnowheremusic

MERCH: http://lilxlotus.storenvy.com/products/18507607-lil-lotus-noose-longsleeve

And for the first time
Im feeling closer to closure
I Feel the storm blowing over,
like i can close my eyes tonight

And i can see it in your eyes
(Let go)
A whisper in the night
(Run home)
Run home, Run home

And thought i was right for too long
Now its time to face it
I can feel it inside of my bones
And its so hard to shake it
And for the first time
Im feeling closer to closure
I Feel the storm blowing over,
like i can close my eyes tonight

And i can see it in your eyes
(Let go)
A whisper in the night
(Run home)
Run home, Run home

Run Home (Prod. nothing,nowhere.)

video - https://youtu.be/9mTGTjh39Kc

mix/master - @youngburial

nowadays I wonder
if you cared at all
I'm anxious from the topic
and the adderall

if I tell you that I'm sorry
and its all my fault
will you fuck me when its over
and the pills wear off 

lately I don't want no new friends
really I jus wan blow my head
maybe it's drugs I'm missing
really I'm numb to all this

outside I look calm
but in my head I'm fucked
like why you think
I always keep that bottle tucked

they talk about my life
as if they're living it
like we didn't crawl thru mud
to get to past where we been

nowadays i just am not sure
still giving everything
still need more

nowadays i just am not sure
I'm not sure
I'm not sure

nowadays I wonder
if you cared at all
I'm anxious from the topic
and the adderall

if I tell you that im sorry
and its all my fault
will you Fuck me when its over
and the pills wear off

lately I don't want no new friends
really I jus wan blow my head
mostly it's just drugs I'm missing
really I'm just numb to all this

anxious from the topic & the adderall

@prodreaper @93feetofsmoke

i can't trust anyone 
tell your friends pretty stories 
i just wanted a peace of mind 
and all the years wasted time 

every bridge is burned 
i don't wanna know 
stabbed me in the heart then you took my  soul 
never get it back i can't get it back 
no, no, no 

like be honest?  do you want it?
i know your eyes when you're lying 
and i'm trying, and i'm dying to hold it together in my hands 

no trust 

(93FEETOFSMOKE)
I dont understand
Where the Fuck I am 
Blood on my back
Blisters on my hands

Do you even know
Who the Fuck i am lately 
I can feel the stress
Gripping round my neck
Save me 

Do you understand 
Time is getting thin
Lately
Trailing a fine line 
Between fine and kill me 

6 speed
See me Earnhardt
Thru the nosebleeds

No trust I got no love
Left in me 

6 speed
See me Earnhardt
Thru the nosebleeds

No trust 
I got no love
Left in me 

I tried my best 
Is it working
My brain is 
Such a fucking a bully

Do you understand 
Time is getting thin
Lately
Trailing a fine line 
Between fine and kill me 

6 speed
See me Earnhardt
Thru the nosebleeds

No trust I got no love
Left in me

no trust w/93FEETOFSMOKE (prod. reaper)

Spotify

Is This What They Call Love? [prod mistyh]

Mixed by IOF & Bangss
Mastered by Bangss

bangss:

In my bed i feel you wide awake
In my head i hear you everyday
But i cant wait till it all fades away
And i cant make out what your trying to say

I see monsters in my room at night
I put my mattress on floor so theres nowhere to hide
I keep my closet doors open with a light inside
The thing about all of these monsters is we look alike

Are you the one who sits behind my eyes at night rewatching all my memories like my heads a big movie screen inside
Are you the one who likes to take their precious time devising every line i write and speak
Are you the one who makes assumptions about other people and how they lead their lives. 
Are you the one who keeps me bothered
Ill wake up and check my phone screen one more time x3

Are you the one who takes my hand so frequently and tells me how its easily avoidable being beat up and used again
Are you the one who says that im your everything and nothing with a sudden change breath. 
Are you the one whos so self conscious lets be honest with ourselves for just one time
Are you the one whos so hypnotic make me forget all the trouble in my life, in my life, end my life

monsters (+ shattered)

spotify/apple music

Monsters (+ shattered)

available on all platforms: https://song.link/us/i/1456734832

artwork: @levistrauck

MUSIC VIDEO: https://youtu.be/WXTedaF9_Jw

kiss me <3 feat. Swing High, Swing Low (prod. 4evr)

instrumental by marc garcia <3
https://www.youtube.com/user/MessicanCover

think of me//winter nights *p. marc garcia*

produced by https://soundcloud.com/bornhero
mixed & mastered by https://soundcloud.com/mtsilvermusic
--------------------------------
why can’t i get out my head?
and every day feels the same
know you can’t save me
no, you can’t save me

wake up and want a quick death
my brain fills up with hate
know you can’t save me
no, you can’t save me

why can’t i feel like my life’s on track?
why do all these people i love hurt me bad?

sorry if i don’t get along with you
anxiety controls the things i do

in school i wouldn’t fit in
stood out in every class
know you can’t save me
no, you can’t save me

smoke weed right outside the gym
since then i’ve had the gas
know you can’t save me
no, you can’t save me

why can’t i seem to break this cycle?
why do all these things in life feel so vital?

sorry if i look down, i’m feeling blue
anxiety controls the things i do, yeah...

does it really have to be this way?
does it really have to be this way?
does it really have to end this way?

i don’t know anymore
i don’t know anymore
i don’t know anymore
i’m not really sure

anxiety (prod. born hero)

leaving me *p. foxwedding*

day 38 cant make it
counting scars like marks in the pavement
all the love in me turned to hatred
and beautiful things bring pain when
they're gone like we all will be
wish I could kill my fucking feelings
stuck in this hell scratched your name in the ceiling
starting to think that this is really how it ends
been 6 months since I've seen you
hope you're doing good yea me too
things have changed so much and I've seen a new life
it all fell into place without you by my side
then 10 years came and went so quick
your first love's gone and got 3 kids
it took so long but there's so much I've missed
I've learned life hurts but I love this

And all I ever really wanted was you in it
Maybe I'm meant to spend forever as a masochist

all I have left is in my head
a blank space with your name in it
wish you would have stayed but I understand
went too deep and drowned again
I think the pain made me love instead
pulled out the oages inside my head
felt what it means to see everything and
every being for what it is
I still miss you so much
but everythings hopeless and its not so bad
add another slash and run it back screaming

Day 38 cant make it
counting scars like marks in the pavement
all the love in me turned to hatred
and beautiful things bring pain when
they're gone like we all will be
wish I could kill my fucking feelings
stuck in this hell scratched your name in the ceiling
starting to think that this is really how it ends
been 6 months since I've seen you
hope you're doing good yea me too
things have changed so much and I've seen a new life
It all fell into place without you by my side
then 10 years came and went so quick
your first love's gone and got 3 kids
it took so long but there's so much I've missed
I've learned life hurts but I love this

Day 38

day 38 (prod. shon lindauer)

make up [prod. greaf]

beats/collaborations/features/bookings: davidentendu@gmail.com

anxiety (prod. born hero)

david entendu

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