Greetings and good afternoon to my SC friends. This is the 10th and final song intended for my upcoming album ‘What Color Is Your Paradox’. It is also my 7th mind-blowing collaboration with our dear friend Carlos Vivanco (https://soundcloud.com/carlosvivanco-1, https://carlosvivanco1.bandcamp.com). 

This piece was highly entertaining and challenging to work on. We started with clearly defined regions (mine being the more techno sounding stuff… Carlos building the traditional instrument sections). I then mangled the whole thing, and tried to blur the lines more as the song progresses, until both worlds felt fully merged by the end. At least, that was the goal. I’ll let you decide if the structure succeeds in that regard. :)

The title is also quite significant to me at this point in my life; based on the idea of ‘masking’, and our growing inability to do so. 

If you aren’t familiar with the term ‘masking’, one Mental Health Care website I found defines it this way: “Masking often involves suppressing or hiding true emotions, which can lead to a buildup of unresolved feelings and contribute to increased stress, anxiety, and emotional turmoil in the long-term. In the context of mental health and neurodivergence, masking refers to the actions or coping strategies that individuals use to conceal their genuine thoughts, emotions, or challenges.”

It didn’t really occur to me at first that I was masking when I was younger. I guess that idea doesn’t resonate when you’re deeply lost in the illusion; at least, until something makes it obvious. But in hindsight, I’ve worn many masks over the course of my life (Art Director, Technician, Pre-Press Specialist and Graphic Artist would be some of my professional masks. And I would even go so far as to include Husband, Father and Son, since I was on auto-pilot during the earliest stages of those as well). 

As my life progressed, I felt more and more insincere in those roles. I felt something was wrong. I just couldn’t put my finger on it. Then COVID (something that actually required us to wear real masks. What irony!) came along, and miraculously changed that for all of us. We gained the necessary space we needed, to finally see the illusion more clearly. Now, that illusion grows more fragile and transparent by the day. So while I’m still in the early stages of trying to figure out the new paradigm… I suspect the really critical takeaway at this point is just recognizing when we’re being our genuine selves, and when we’re lost in a role; especially if that role is debilitating to our personal growth and well being.

Another thing I’m thinking a lot on these days…. Society is dependent on me playing those roles. And society doesn’t really care whether I’m happy or not (as long as I keep paying my bills, and buying their products, and believing their lies). So maybe, just maybe, society doesn’t have my best interests at heart (as I had originally hoped). Maybe… just maybe… we’re going to need to redefine who we are personally, as we stop playing along with this globally unconscious and ultimately destructive agenda.

Thick and chunky topic, I know. But that’s the way the world feels to me these days… like we needed a brisk slap across the face to wake us all up. COVID was that slap (and probably just the first of many still to come). It’s time to prioritize our own self interests; because if we don’t, they certainly won’t. So rip off those masks, and let your freak flag fly. It’s our life, and we’ll be the ones sitting on our deathbed, asking ourselves if we lived life true to ourselves…. or if we just fulfilled the role demanded by this illusion.

We hope you enjoy “Cracks In The Surface”; and it inspires you to think about what aspects of your reality are cracking. Keep in mind… if you still have a pulse, there is always time to change things up. :)

Paradox?

Cracks In The Surface | Carlos Vivanco & GrevusAnjl

(Jan 9th, 2025) Just a quick message to let you know I'm not going to be active here for a while. If you need to reach me, you can always message me at GrevusAnjl@mac.com. 
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Welcome to my sonic playground. I don't consider myself a skilled musician. I just sculpt sounds to quiet my mind... often with surprising and humorous results. Thank you for stopping by. I hope you enjoyed your visit. :)