xoxo. 2021

https://soundcloud.com/heylog

lyrics:
staring at the random number
but my mind is at a blank
lookin at my computer
so i ask, "who is this"
it was my lover
how could i forget?
ur light im thunder
ill hurt u twice again
staring at the late phone call
whoops did i miss that on purpose?
yeah that was intentional
and all this distortion
girl i never wanted this
for u to go off to college
and honestly i hated it
so id never have a chance

she say that she forget everything we ever had
baby that is horrible
i think she got some problems
so u need to worry bout yourself
and theres no denying that u need a lil help
i already played the part 
so go find someone else
i know that she hates it
how i been so far cropped out in the distance
i need to stay away from u 
no its not an accident
ive focused avoiding u this whole time on purpose
im sorry not really atleast i didnt forget

i tried my best baby but this is never gonna happen
im not the one to show love, shouldve known that was a problem
i picked these flowers for u i know u probably tossed em
now i just be resting from girls n everybody
she dont really love me
she just like to attention
how am i this stupid
omg im gonna lose it
take in all this caffeine
i still have no energy
drinking all this coffee
still got no energy

she say that she forget everything we ever had
baby that is horrible
i think she got some problems
so u need to worry bout yourself
and theres no denying that u need a lil help
i already played the part 
so go find someone else
i know that she hates it
how i been so far cropped out in the distance
i need to stay away from u 
no its not an accident
ive focused avoiding u this whole time on purpose
im sorry not really atleast i didnt forget

at least i didn't forget

heylog - at least i didn't forget

lyrics:

Our Safe guards Couldnt pull me in
The beams rot And I let them cave in
A fortnight Spent Behind these weathered gates
Worn hands slip the door and permeate the house
In my world its easier to suffocate
My eyes glaze my tired form emaciates
The warm dark birthed me to these cold parts
The birth marks Cover me on both arms 
If the horse dies then the foal does too
I don’t wanna ever live my life without you
Independence begs me to overlook truth so I do
Myself is a word I use around u
I just gotta a lot of pain in my chest woah woah
I cannot be like him but ill do my best woah woah
Lately I think I lost the fear of death woah woah
Baby I can’t be saved just save ur breath oh no

Don’t let them see u cry is what u said oh oh
I know that they’ll love me when im dead oh oh
Ion even wanna talk about the bad no oh
I like how it fuck me in my head oh oh
Blood drips from my nose
Stains bleed thru the snow
Its these nights they will never know

Take my body and feed it to the typhoon
Better than having say that strange goodbye soon
Baby I would never treat u same as u treated urself
I admire ur soul cause it is see thru
 late at night I drink and i fill myself up
Poison pours into my open mouth and I
Mean it when I say I miss how we was
This the game we chose to play with our love and I know
But Where’s your honour
I can see pain flow fast into her mold
So She left me cornered
But suffering like this bring me home that’s all that I know
As Toronto gets warmer 
I can come alive in a way that I never knew
Pour it up into my soda 
I started rolling up purple every time im feeling blue
Our Safe guards Couldnt pull me in
The beams rot And I let them cave in
A fortnight Spent Behind these weathered gates
Worn hands slip the door and permeate the house
and In my world its easier to suffocate
My eyes glaze the sweat on me evaporates
The warm dark birthed me to these cold parts
The birth marks Cover me on both arms 

Don’t let them see u cry is what u said oh oh
I know that they’ll love me when im dead oh oh
Ion even wanna talk about the bad no oh
I like how it fuck me in my head oh oh
Blood drips from my nose
Stains bleed thru the snow
Its these nights they will never know

these nights are urs (splashgvng)

produced by heylog

lyrics:
would u like to meet in the summer
catch up on life or should i even bother to plan a dine
i don't really even know where u reside
pick apart my soul and it feel like
something has been missing
right now i really miss u
n when i'm alone i wish i could reach out and kiss you
but life isn't fair
no life's never fair
the one i truly loved is gone now i'm the only one that's here
man i'm really done, getting tired, might just book a plane
this the same shirt i wore, for like 3 days
throw it on, roll my eyes looking mad at the stains
no if u can't handle this then u can't handle me
i'm busy hangin w myself so i got no time
to come through and drink booze or waste my life
peer pressure, i said i don't wanna get high
but the pressure continues i got a fragile mind
so i fantasize about a future that lies
and u are in it w me, all the way till we die
but i don't want it to seem like i am forcing
anything oh at all, just tell me what u think

always feelin down, guess this is life
surprised i live another night
surprised i haven't took my life
surprised i'm even still alive
but i got way too much to lose
i don't do it for me, i do it for you
i put away the knife, i did that for you
i'm wonderin if u can see, i'm right in front of you

so i fantasize about a girl who i'd die for
and she look up to me, like "ur the one that i search for"
but that's too good to be true
and that is my point of view
if i had to ask one thing
would you die for me too
so would u wanna run away with me..?
through the mountains and things i've never seen
on a hill maybe lay down by a tree
and close my eyes with a little bit of breeze
she said, "i can't do this log... i can't look after u no more"
so why u telling me this now?
i thought u had me figured out

man i'm really done getting tired might just book for a plane
in the north montana, gotta isolate
need someone to break my heart to feel something
cus i deserve it i've caused way too many pains
so i fantasize about a girl who i'd die for
and she look up to me, like "ur the one that i search for"
but that's too good to be true
and that is my point of view
if i had to ask one thing
would you die for me too

spotify

reside

dying on my own' is available on all streaming platforms!
Go listen to it and lmk what you think ✨

prodby: 
@prod5head
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCF36HvJAbYz7Ki1ckns9CBw
mastered by: 
@prod5ynox
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-ivYmf-wZvLaV2-LohqYUA
coverart by: @h5.o__o

This gon be my second official release ever and im really happy how it turned out considering it not even being a year since I started making music.

At this point I wanna give a special and huge shoutout to astralvision & and the people closest to me for keeping the energy up. ⛓️🖤

lyrics: 
Feeling like I'm dying inside
Feeling like I'm crying tonight
Feeling like I'm doing this for myself
I don't wanna talk to you anymore
I don't wanna see you on my phone
I don't need your help I'm on my own
I feel like dying on my own

Even though I feel like dying on my own
I still miss every single one I met along
I don't really mind if you say so (If you say so)
I don't really mind if you say so (Do you say so?)
I don't really mind if you stay hoe
I don't wanna fight I just wanna escape my life
I just feel like dying tonight, I just wanna be be your side
Fuck this cruel world filled with nothing but agony
Visualizing all the things that I could be
Knowing damn well my smile won't ever be (won't ever be)
The same, oh no
My heart is gone
I feel alone
I'll stay unknown

Feeling like I'm dying inside
Feeling like I'm crying tonight
Feeling like I'm doing this for myself
I don't wanna talk to you anymore
I don't wanna see you on my phone
I don't need your help i'm on my own
I feel like dying on my own

dying on my own (prod. 5head)

produced by heylog

lyrics:
so how long has it been since i saw you
it was right after summer when i was leaving ur place
and i knew right then and there i won't be okay
wipe the tears from our eyes, everything will be okay
do u believe in love cause i'm having a hard time
believing myself, let's drink to that and raise my
cup and make a toast to us lonely people
at least we know we'll forever be peaceful and so i been
counting months it's almost eleven
since we've talked and showed u affection
i'll never have anyone to connect with
like we had or the feeling of commit
maybe this time i'll go up to heaven
getting weaker by the day, pain just pressing
thinking what to do with my life, it's depressing
thinking i'll always be alone, i expect it

on my arm, you look with dissapointment
i knew it was wrong, trust me won't do it again
u made me feel alive, i thank u for that
now i got a heart that has no light in it

eleven

prod by xona<3 this beat sucks im sorry(,:

thank you to all the ppl that help me make this ily (all in order)
@reesoo
@heylog
@hovis
@moodyriley
@quannnic
-comet
@1vil
@uglysneaker
@valerii

avoid

avoid w/ reesoo, heylog, hovis, moodyriley, comet, vil, uglysneaker & valerii

produced by heylog
enjoy

lyrics:
as usual i manage to breakdown
don't bother me i enjoy no sound
can't talk to ppl and i know i should
the nerves i build up come out me like a flood
i expect a better me to finally come my way
but the hope i'm losing is drifting away
i forgot that u were mine and that u exist
and that's a good thing
i'm making progress
i hold a whole heart
i gotta use it wise
i cancel all my plans
cus i changed my mind
she smell like lavender
and i think i'm in love
wait hold on a min
can we take a pause
i needa overthink
when i talk to you
it's not on purpose
now u know the truth
i told u everything
n all my secrets
and now it feels wrong
and i know i'm screwed
i look in your eyes it's like looking in an abyss
thanks for your time i learned a lot from it
i'm different now, done with u, you know what i quit
i'm leaving now, don't care to be part of this
YOU SAID SHE WAS A WHORE
WELL MAYBE UR THE HOE
ABSCONDING EVERY GIRL
IS THIS WHERE I GROW
COULDN'T ASK FOR MORE
I'LL BREAK EVERY BONE
NOW DUDES CARE FOR ME
BUT I ONLY GOT 1 BRO

𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘢𝘯
𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘶𝘱

𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨

lavender

prod logan

lyrics:
fall slowly
all the debt it cost me
run, charge me
oh the pains so lovely
burn to ash
watch all unfold
safe before i crash
u were too hard to hold

it was too hard to hold
i had to let go
why won't the problems stay away
i swear this shits just getting old

fall slowly
all the debt it cost me
run, charge me
oh the pains so lovely
ur wasting so much time
but it's all apart of your plan
throw my soul in fire
as u wash me off your hands

so lovely

'goodbye' produced by heylog

lyrics:
almost 5am, i find it harder to sleep
i crack the window and i hear every animal sing
with a wind blowing soft, rustling through the leaves
admire nature as it comes alive from winter to spring
the flowers grow so tall that they start to bloom
and i just took a couple out cus i picked them for u
hoping one day you'll travel here to see what's new
cus this bouquet is gonna die if u don't visit me soon
and i
have a difficult time
spending days
when ur on my mind
wish this
would just go away
cus i'm trying to push u away
why
do i feel lonely
knowing i
hurt to see
an outcast
no one wants to be
and giggled at
n always being teased

can someone give a valid reason on why i shouldn't die
in disbelief that i will never see a point in life
i'm on and off of feeling bad and for a second i'm fine
it's so messed up and i don't think that i will ever resign
i'm so bipolar and i don't want u to see me like this
cus i guarantee i'll scare u if i speak from my chest
i didn't mean for u to leave when u saw that on my wrist
and i'm so sorry for putting u through all of this 
so why
do u keep playing w me
is it cause
u get lonely
in the night
and think of us
well it's fine
cus i think of us too
why
do i feel like this
well nevermind
cus u don't care about this
and if i die
will u grieve
and will cry
and will u miss me

CAN SOMEONE GIVE A VALID REASON ON WHY I SHOULDN'T DIE
CAUSE YOU MAKE ME WANNA KILL MYSELF OR GO GRAB THE KNIFE
I'M AT THE AGE WHERE I CAN NEVER SEE A POINT IN LIFE
IN DISBELIEF OF EVERYTHING THAT I'M JUST WASTING MY TIME
I'M SO BIPOLAR AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO SEE ME LIKE THIS
CAUSE I GUARANTEE I'LL SCARE YOU IF I SPEAK FROM MY CHEST
I'M AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN WITH ALL OF MY REGRETS
THERE'S MANY THINGS I WISH WERE GONE OR WISH I COULD RESET
I STEP INTO THE LIGHT AND DID THIS WITHOUT A GROUP
AND SO YOU NOTICING ME NOW WHEN I'M STEADY ON THE MOVE
AND YOU JUST THINK IT'S ALL OKAY TO HIT ME UP OUT OF THE BLUE
I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND OR TYPE OF BENEFIT TO SATISFY YOU
SO PLEASE GIVE A VALID REASON THAT YOU WANT ME DEAD
IS IT SAFE TO EVEN KNOW THAT THIS JUST MIGHT BE A TEST
FOR YOU TO TRICK ME INTO THINKING I'M NOTHING BUT A MESS
DELETE YOUR IMAGE THAT I LONGED FOR AND NOT SEEN AGAIN

if i can't love
will i end up
alone and forgot
or spend it w someone
i can't fall in love
my hearts dead
probably numb
i miss u my dear
it feels like it's been years

no way home
i was never close
the path ends here
don't know where to go
stone cold lies
i knew i was right
so farewell
cus this is goodbye

goodbye

cover of 'wear' by @xona
guitar played/re-recorded by logan

speak lightly
i won't seem
that worried
about u and me
down few
many lose
lives quick
nothing’s new
hiding right behind you
you’ll choose
you’ll choose

from what i wear
to see and stare
i swear i swear
you’ll have my care

how are you here with me
i told you i’m scared of-
graphic and the terror to seize
it’s more than it could seem
it’s more than wear and tear
and i could hardly bear
and i could hardly bear
i  could hardly bear
i could hardly-

from what I wear
to see and stare
i swear i swear
you’ll have my care

wear cover (xona)

produced by xona, ruevi, & oc

big thank you to all individuals who helped make this song possible <3

@ruevi @prod-oc
@heylog
@hiraethsry
@sleepywater
@sinxi
@caspywaspy
@vilsynth
@valerii
@deadfishh

the lyrics were over 4000 characters and that's the limit for soundcloud ♥

-lyrics-
https://genius.com/Xona-avoid-ii-lyrics

xona

avoid II w/ ruevi, heylog, hiraeth, sleepwater, sinxi, casperrr, vil, valerii & deadfish

w @heylog
produced by sleepwater and leftquiet

lyrics:
ive been to heaven hell and she wanted it
she wanna ham my neck till im on it
switching positions i feel like im in night time
i don't feel the sun no more i dont like sunshine
quicker my heart declines
more that i find myself
shut my windows and blinds
more that i hate myself
i dislike everything
but dislike you the most
my lifes full of sin
cos i dont know where to go

stood outside im seeing flies
im outside you know my time
wait for this im on a climb
fuck my psyche its pain until i die
gaining more likes am i doing something right
its gone up in spikes have i gone up in my life
maybe you should listen to me once in a while
surely you would be different if you werent in denial
EVERY THOUGHT SHES EVER HAD STARTS TO FUCKING PILE
OH I WISH I NEVER HAD SHES FUCKING VILE
depression getting really bad you can crack a smile
you can barely leave your bed stop acting like a child
how did you get rid of your sweat did you run it off
do something w ur life and make it worthwile

heylog:
she's so psychotic, i knew when i saw
speaking so toxic ur just like ur mom
everything i do she gets really pissed
so why does it feel like it's always my fault
god ur chaotic, quit starting a fight
i ain't one to argue, it's a waste of time
she purposely trying to spark up a flame
and now all of this is getting out of line
oh baby
ur so cold
ur making this easy
give more
oh baby
we're off course
she said she want more she said she want more
innocence
don't exist
she'll find ways to get your head
she's offended again
exaggerate things i say
oh my dear
you're in fear
block it out with a few beers
everyone she's ever cursed is in a pile
everyone she's ever hurt calls her vile
and everyone she's done the worst gets away
am i the only one who's learned from her pain
now the whole place burnt down
and i can see it in her eyes she's happy
i hope you know u look like a clown
cus only you would act a little trashy

𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘺 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨

pile w/heylog

produced by heylog

lyrics:
her eyes frown upon me looking at the mess
marks are on my shoulder blade and right below my neck
oh she can't stand the look i give her back
please don't be afraid
it was just a little scratch

it was just a little scratch..

u make me nervous
sending chills from head to toe
i could feel ur fingertips 
dig into my bones
i'm not scared at all
you can have me by my throat
her iris weakens thee
the brown just got a hold of me

a hold of me..

you look cold so i'll keep u warm
keep u warm
walking through the snow and i see ur door
see ur door
u look so pretty waiting there for me
there for me
sparks are round ur eyes when u stare at me
stare at me

stare at me
stare at me..

iris

produced by heylog

lyrics:
when i burn in fire
you gave a hand
i'll try not to let go
she understands
nothing is more beautiful
than your demand
i thank u for being
so delicate

i'll decide ur demeanor to me
no ambition it was never easy
on the highway he finally came clean
how the hell could you do that to me
i thought u were my bestfriend
cus i know that they don't cut ur back
text and i won't answer, get on read
don't play w my emotions i'm so delicate
so delicate

when i burn in fire 
u gave a hand
but i might just let go
and she understands
nothing is more beautiful
than your demand
i hope i treated you
better than him

walking outside notice autumnal leaves
yellow and red and a few orangish trees
the air is fresh when i'm jogging thru this subdivision
my legs hurt.. take breath heavily
run by three deer on my right
they look at me like i'm threatening their life
the parents are guarding their fawn
sometimes i wish family could be us

eleven

heylog

Recent comments

STORMY QUEST

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