emo r

Featuring @sendflowrs
Produced by @hellahaunted & @sainttomorrow
Mixed & mastered by @horoshamusic
Logo by Dead & Detached

i been smoking too much like every day

who would'a thought that these drugs don't really numb all the pain

my eyes stay shut but i still see your face
i'm still so miserable

still feel unfulfilled


and ive been smoking too much like every day
since fifteen think it's rotting my brain

i got my windows closed but i still hear the rain

i don't like myself anymore

think i've changed

and while you sit there drunk on the side of the pave

do you ever think about those times in the cage

with your friends in the sun oh those times they have changed

now i'm sitting on my own thinking of life on a stage


thinkin of life on a stage

these days i'm alone 

take 3 blunts to the face

spend my days blazed just thinking of life in the states

shoutout jj
i'm tryna record everyday


i think i'm going straight to hell for those two years

if you didnt know im sad you must be new here

cliche dyed hair
i'm a loser

forever screaming on my own at a computer


i'm a loser and I know it
got it tatted on my sleeve just to show how much i own it
stay glued to my computer
writing sad songs and playing first-person shooters


watch me self-destruct

catch me yelling "nerf this"
while i'm rolling up another blunt


i used to do this for fun

now i do this on account of all of my bad luck

i been smoking too much like every day

who would'a thought that these drugs don't really numb all the pain

my eyes stay shut but i still see your face
i'm still so miserable

still feel unfulfilled


i'm still so miserable

still feel unfulfilled

i don't even know what i'm fighting for



Listen on Spotify!

Loser w/ sendflowrs (Prod. caves & Saint Tomorrow)

im in my bag of excuses for bad decisions i made  
bad actions stemming from trauma that doesnt justificate  
i look around and see all of this destruction and decay 
but i think the only difference is i didnt see what was right in my face 
at some point you have to face it
used to think fixing my problems was caving
i used to think that my problems were what made me special and that shit is dangerous
and i used to think that if i got better my art would suffer as a trade and
it got to the point where i thought that my mental well being aint even worth saving 
but honestly i was mistaken 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i was down for so long
i dug myself too far 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i made myself the problem 

i was a victim of temptation and my own temperament
i get too passionate i come off batshit and 
im just a magnet for tragic infatuation 
almost had it but i couldnt capture it 
dont wanna trap it  
dont know whats happenin
but when youre laughing
its great distraction 
i think we might just be moving to fast and 
keep your hands in at all times and belts fastened 
i dont know 
what the fuck i was on 
how could i be so wrong 
i was down for so long
i dug myself too far 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i made myself the problem 
and honestly i dont know
what the fuck i was on
how could i be so wrong 
i was down for so long
i dug myself too far 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i made myself the problem

my big bag of excuses for this hole I dug myself into

vocals by @supachefm & @lilskeleskrrt
mix & master by @polearm

goner, loser w/ skele

(casperrr)
look at the place im in 
notice the pain i feel 
sometimes i wish u were here
so i could have u close 2 me 

look at the way i live
notice the way i bleed
i hide my scars under   sleeves
but i always have blades close 2 me

(self harming i'm addicted to pain
blood flowing down the drain 
u fucked up my whole brain 
cause i still want u to have my last name)~

(skele)
what does it feel like to wake up with closure
drinking alone i've been drunk since october
hoping for change told my mom i'd get sober
blood from my veins ill bleed till it's over
and im so scared that i cant fix the breaks u made
and it's not fair cause i'd be fine if u just stayed
sometimes i wish u were just so i could get sum fucking sleep
sometimes i wish u were baby you are everything i need

(casperrr)
look at the place im in 
notice the pain i feel 
sometimes i wish u were here
so i could have u close 2 me 

look at the way i live
notice the way i bleed
i hide my scars under   sleeves
but i always have blades close 2 me (2x)

look at the place i'm in w/skele (pekarot)

I'm Not Myself

VOID ETERNAL

ANX13TY

CHR0MAKILL3R

F0RTUNE_TELLER (feat. STATIC DRESS)

watch the leaves fall on my legs 
as i wait and let the time pass
seasons go my life's still a mess
why did i put my life in both ur hands?

fading away disappearing fast
all of ur love for me like a crash
why did this happen is this a test?
i hate u for making me hate myself

im cutting my wrists breaking my bones
stuck in my head, stuck in my home
laying awake all night long
lookin at u thru my phone
lonely everyday i do the same
sit on my chair and i rot away
while i keep dreamin bout u 
and the way u were dressed that day
im cutting my wrists breaking my bones
stuck in my head, stuck in my home
laying awake all night long
lookin at u thru my phone
lonely everyday i do the same
sit on my chair and i rot away
while i keep dreamin bout u 
and the way u were dressed that day

don't even bother callin my phone
i changed my number and im goin ghost
i hate the life and the way it goes
im well today but tomorrow nobody knows
different drinks, cigs and a bloody nose
that's the way the sad ones roll
losing track, of how many tracks, 
i pulled of doing song after song
song after song
tens in a row 
and im losing control
losing compusure 
destroying my soul
im just hopin that in peace i will go 
cuz~

im cutting my wrists breaking my bones
stuck in my head, stuck in my home
laying awake all night long
lookin at u thru my phone
lonely everyday i do the same
sit on my chair and i rot away
while i keep dreamin bout u 
and the way u were dressed that day

cutting my wrists, breaking my bones (young taylor)

Outside like the plants and trees
I'm outside with the steel in links
I'm outside walking by myself
Like there's nobody out for me
Looking in the endless foggy water finding things
Tossed the piece and parts into the cauldron and the steam
It doesn't eat in objects more-so small internal things
Most delicious parts of it are parts you cannot see

I stay up
It's such a late hour when i stay up
Until I hear the birds chirping and I get all depressed
Then I guilt myself about it
Then rush myself to bed
Think I missed you once again
And I heard the callin I just hope that I can find it
In the faint and silent signals of the universe
And i dont wanna act so ignorant and come off callous
So I ask for nothing in return

Outside like the plants and trees
I'm outside with the steel in links
I'm outside walking by myself
Like there's nobody out for me
Looking in the endless foggy water finding things
Tossed the piece and parts into the cauldron and the steam
It doesn't eat in objects more-so small internal things
Most delicious parts of it are parts you cannot see

Yeah, i tripped on myself oh jeez
I hope i know you when im 70
I just get scared when everythings ok
I don't mean to attention seek

it went over me and stuck to my heart like a curse

Red (Europa Remix)

clarity in kerosene

mixed by @polearm
featuring @sewerperson
produced by @splashgvng and @irby314

tell that im selfish
i dont care ive heard it all before
unhealthy
i dont care whatever slam the door
cant help it
never seem to get my story straight
ill be late to the grave
at my own damn funeral
tell that im selfish
i dont care ive heard it all before
unhealthy
i dont care whatever slam the door
cant help it
never seem to get my story straight
ill be late to the grave
at my own damn funeral

i think ill be late to the grave at my own damn funeral
say what you say i know i act quite unusual
fake homies fake like they dont know that im on to them
its okay whatever bro cuz 
i was never fond of them
i just copped and popped out to LA
shot the shit and kicked it with my bae
told my brothers theres another way
now we been grinding time to fill the days
we been on the sun in outerspace
stress was melted
felt it drip away
i been on a hella different wave
i been on a hella different wave

sewerperson:
moonlight thru opening in the sun roof
it feel like one of these times where i just have to tell u i
love u
and i dont wait till the morning
and i dont wanna wait anymore like
tell me
how many of these nights u been alone u really happy
everything im feeling come back round to overlap me
i guess i just wanted u to know ion know what id do without ya
i guess i just wanted u to know i still been
selfish
sorry
i cant help it
promise
blacked out
i cant feel if im honest
can u tell me bout ur face cause i forgot it
since i pushed most those memories into my closet

tell that im selfish
i dont care ive heard it all before
unhealthy
i dont care whatever slam the door
cant help it
never seem to get my story straight
ill be late to the grave
at my own damn funeral
tell that im selfish
i dont care ive heard it all before
unhealthy
i dont care whatever slam the door
cant help it
never seem to get my story straight
ill be late to the grave
at my own damn funeral

selfish! ft. sewerperson (prod. irby)

prod. pink

lyrics:
Let's pretend that I'm alright
I'm anxious little psychopathic fuck
can't sleep at night
all alone the thoughts they've grown
and I ain't putting up no fight
can't conduce the fucking truth up out your mouth but that's alright
~
can't control but my mind grip
gotta let it go the thoughts they flow
ain't gotta fucking trip
lifes a puzzle, mind is muddled
clear it up, I kiss your lips
grip your hips
biting on your neck until you fucking drip

like a puddle, we cuddle until the sundown
ride my shuttle rebuttal, we smoke and comedown
I'm so faded, I'm crossed
intoxicated I'm lost
inebriated what cost?
I'm feeling run down

been stuck in head sometimes
don't leave me for dead, i'm blind
in due time i will find
that, it don't matter what you wanna do
just put you're all into
focus you're mind and I swear you will get it
don't stress the small, stand up tall pay attention
sure you fall, but will you get up? redemption

Let's pretend that I'm alright
I'm anxious little psychopathic fuck
can't sleep at night
all alone the thoughts they've grown
and I ain't putting up no fight
can't conduce the fucking truth up out your mouth but that's alright
~
can't control but my mind grip
gotta let it go the thoughts they flow
ain't gotta fucking trip
lifes a puzzle, mind is muddled
clear it up, I kiss your lips
grip your hips
biting on your neck until you fucking drip

like a puddle, we cuddle until the sundown
ride my shuttle rebuttal, we smoke and comedown
I'm so faded, I'm crossed
intoxicated I'm lost
inebriated what cost?
I'm feeling run down

PanicAttack! [prod. pink]

Who Are You?

Get Over It

produced by: @yunnygoldz
featuring: @lilskeleskrrt

lyrics:

// flowrs // 

it’s so degrading 
the way you say that
you know what you want,
and you don’t want to love me

you’re so persuading,
i fuckin hate it
when you say those things
that you know 
fucking cut me 

our love is fading
and you’re evading
all these cloudy thoughts 
cus you’re so fucking lucky

just fucking say it
can’t catch a wave
so i’ll just stay afloat
cus you’re swimming above me 

fuck you,
fuck him 
fuck everything,
every thought,
don’t wanna ever think you’re fine,
i know i’m not 
tell me does he 
love you
the same way that you
loved me
i hope you fucking die 
i swear to god
i’ll kill you with my own two hands
you went too far 

but i’m here
and you’re there 
and you tell me 
that it’ll be okay 
you’re a tumour 
i can’t see you
but you kill me more
every single day 

// skele // 

it’s so frustrating 
how you push me away 
then you’re pulling me back by the end of the day 
it’s so annoying 
how u say that u need me 
then act like u hate me 
i’m tired of waiting 

so why u got act all mad for 
tell me that ur needing more 
why u gotta slam the car door 
n now ur taking off my shirt on your floor 
but i’m here 
and you’re there 
and you tell me that it’ll be okay
i don’t care

// flowrs //

but i’m here
and you’re there 
and you tell me 
that it’ll be okay 
you’re a tumour 
i can’t see you
but you kill me more
every single day

tumour w/ skele

i hope you feel something
self-produced. hmu for beats/mixing/mastering

I'm Not Myself

HKFIFTYONE

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