so close 2 the edge

he said it, i'm too damaged

w/ @scapexgoat


i'm trying my best 
i swear i am 
tryna show you i need you 
i wanna hold your hand 
i've been hurt so fucking badly i forget who i am 
this was never part of the plan 
so can you promise you won't run from me 
cause i'm so scared i'm fucking shaking
it gets hard to breathe
n i'm not used to someone wanting me 
god, it feels so fucking comforting

so pour me a drink
and i'll sing you to sleep 
n he said it
i'm too damaged 
bleed through the bandages
i'm so gone, god
i wish i never met him
n just to go sleep
have to be off fucking sedatives
i'm so gone, god
i wish i never met him

[scapegoat] 
i was in the backseat 
looking at my phone
why you never text me
i feel so alone
i just wanted you to stay 
tell me when the fuck you're coming back
i know i'm so bad
hate to see you like that
tell me why the fuck it hurts so bad
i wish i could save you but i know i can't
how the fuck can i help you,
i can't help myself

bleed through the bandages (w/ scapegoat)

linden & nevrfall - wait for me in the next life (ft. heylog)

i would’ve left just the same as you 

@nevrfall

you hurt me in ways that you don’t even know 
n you’re never there when i need u the most
n you never care when i break n it shows 
don’t say that you’ll stay when i know that you’ll go

i jus keep getting fucking worse 
i’m moving backwards 
i’ll keep on breaking 
do your worst 
it doesn’t matter 
it’s funny that i need you
we won’t have an ever after 
say you love me while you’re fucking someone else,

how does that work
our love was filled with patchwork 
a fucked up worn out pattern 
n everything was shattered 
so tell me how does that work 
n i thought you were better 
but every night my chest hurts 
n i can’t take the pressure 
so tell me how does that work 

so what does it feel like 
to know that you’re always on my mind 
to know that i really broke this time 
to know that it’s fucked up my whole life 
i don’t know what to do 
know that i hate me too 
n i would’ve left 
just the same as you 
n i can’t sleep 
in this worn out room 
drink through the night 
till my heart turns blue 

oh well
it’s cold out here 
kinda feels like hell 
left me for dead
but i wish u well
say i’m alright 
but i can’t tell 
isn’t that what u want

how does that work (prod. nevrfall)

i hate your poetry and you hate when i sing
some say we make a good team
at the end of the day you could do what you want to
i'll never question a thing
and i get so nervous legs start shaking
but im pretty sure you know
we don't have much time 
so make up your mind
and tell me where you want to go
before i take you home

maybe i was too optimistic if you want i'll take the blame
i just can't help but reminisce it cause i how these things change
i miss the way that you talk
the hop in your walk 
your eyes and that stupid grin
the way you said its okay i trusted you dang, oh why did i let you in
i should've known better wrote letters made things feel complete
instead i just let her, just let her slip away from me

i hate your poetry and you hate when i sing
some say we make a good team
at the end of the day you could do what you want to
i'll never question a thing
and i get so nervous legs start shaking
but im pretty sure you know
we don't have much time 
so make up your mind
and tell me where you want to go
before i take you home

now it's just me 
reminiscing eighteen
memories can't save me
but i keep looking back
now it's just me 
thinking bout what could be
memories can't save me
but i keep looking back
i keep looking back

cause i hate your poetry and you hate when i sing
some said we made a good team
at the end of the day i just did what i wanted
you'd never question a thing
and i got so lazy things got crazy 
but you probably wouldn't know 
well we had our time
you made up your mind
so i guess it's time to let you go
ok, i'll let you go

let you go

je te tieandrai dans mon coeur jusqu'à ce que je puisse te tenir dans mes bras.

lyrics:

shiki
I see why you left, this is awful
I don't wanna die anymore, I just want you
Kiss me while I'm dying inside of this bottle
Fall in love with strangers, now my heart is a hostel

Left my love on the east coast
But I don't wanna be alone, I don't wanna be alone, no
And you can text me good morning, but we're in different time zones
And I know that you don't care like I do
I'll find another one just like you
I'll find a new one, call her your name
Black my eyes and paint my face a new shade of grey
I ran away, in East LA where none of my love can get in the way
And baby, I don't think that you could save me
But thank you for trying

I hope you don't know it's about you when you hear this
But I knew you'd listen, only reason I wrote this
And I would bleed for you if I thought you would notice

I'm too scared to dream since I saw you
I told you I would move to New York and write a novel
But I'm still in my mom's house
The one that you warned me about
The one you said was haunted
I'm nauseous, I can't stop heaving
Who would want this? I'm still bleeding
Hide my ribs like, yeah I'm eating
Come save me, this room is freezing

skele:
I know why you left, this is terrible
As I was writing this, I wanted to let you know
It's getting really hard to let you go
I wanted five more minutes baby, just so I could hear you talk
Cuz everything I knew just fucking fell apart
You never really cared, you just played the part
And now you're gone, it's all my fault

hostel w/ skele (love,matt x chris marek)

prod: @jolst @irby314
master: https://soundcloud.com/caustyk

i wish that i wasn't wrong


i wish i never called back 
you said
you couldn't tell me that you loved me 
no stress
i hope he treats you better 
than i ever did 
i always break when it ends 
wish you weren't more than a friend
cause i tried so hard
for this
i never thought you'd be gone 
cause i saw stars when we kissed
and it hurt for so long 
again
i never thought you'd be gone
i wish that i wasn't wrong

n i tried too hard 
i guess
i just wanna feel wanted 
and end up hurt in the end
n i should know by now 
that i'm not worth that text
if i was better then maybe 
i'll say it's love when it's sex
n you can fuck me up n i'll stay 
i've learned it's better that way 
i can convince myself that you care when i break
and when your eyes turn to grey 
and all the lies sound the same
i'll know you're leaving for certain 
i've learned the signs of my burden

n i'll ignore it 
like windows down when it's pouring 
i must like hurting myself,
i always know where it's going
n i don't know why i do that 
i wanted love, 
i can say that

i wish that i wasn't wrong this time 
i wish you would've been here 
i wish that i could tell you
i quit smoking cigarettes 
i got stuck on the sentiment 
couldn't look at our necklace 
and i cried getting rid of it
i heard that song
i played it all
wanted to tell you it hurt 
when you missed those calls 
took that trip back home
wanted to see my mom 
n it's been cold in los angeles 
wish we made it to fall
i still give you the benefit 
n honest i'm sick of it
you're not the person that i knew 
i don't know what you did with them
cause you got cold 
n time moved slow 
you left in july 
but i swear there was snow

i wish i never called back (prod. jolst & irby)

guitar by saint mike

i let my body rot 
in this bed 
till there's nothing left of me 
you can do what you want with the bones
clean the mess
find the blade that you left in me 

tell me why 
i hope you found a good alibi 
stay by my side
will it still hurt in the afterlife

you do it me
love when i bleed
your skin feels so cold
touch me at 30 degrees
put my back to the wall 
tell me i'm nothing at all

in which it finally killed me

[+] if you want my heart you gotta steal that </3
* featuring @lilskeleskrrt + @steadysuffer * produced by @prodjolst *

INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/seejayxo
TWITTER: www.twitter.com/seejayxo
DISCORD: www.discord.gg/DRfW7Q4Bmu

wanna go back

+ stream on spotify

wanna go back (feat. skele + steadysuffer)

needed this to change
produced by @pekarot_161
featuring @lilskeleskrrt
mixed by nine to 5 and skele

lyrics:
nine to 5:
Now I'm left in the cold
Stary late night when my breathe turns to smoke
Living in the past when the rest still unfolds
I just wanna go back when my neck wasn't choked I'm
Stuck inside my mind when I'm passing
Highway signs eastbound we were laughing
Now I'm left with nothing but these memories flashing
gone within a moment and I don't know what happened

I can't get away, yeah theres nowhere I can run to
We've been everywhere, I can't begin to forget you
Your shadows everywhere around me even inside my room
Staring at the wall wishing that I was beside you

Living in this empty state of mind
Wander through this empty space
Lost because I know I'll never find
Anyone to take your place
Shivers running up and down my spine
Tears falling down my face
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

skele:
I've been a part of you for too long
And I still write the same songs
I'll wait here forever love until I figure out what you want
It's never enough
Just break me down
And I'll stay put til you're done
I fucking gave you my heart

both:
I fucking gave you my all

nine to 5:
But it was never enough

nine to 5 and skele:
Living in this empty state of mind
Wander through this empty space
Lost because I know I'll never find
Anyone to take your place
Shivers running up and down my spine
Tears falling down my face
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Still needed this to change
Knowing that I gave you all my heart but you still needed this to change
Still needed this to change
Yeah you still needed this to change
Knowing that I gave you all my heart but you still needed this to change

nine to 5 - needed this to change ft. skele (prod. pekarot)

prod @sorrow_bringer

 it really does kill me that i'm not able to showcase what i create/put out how i want it to be, but the piece itself matters the most to me. hopefully one day i'll be able to put together like a music video/lyric for a majority of what i put out, but for now, this is all i got. thank you so much for supporting me and music to this point. i really, really appreciate it. more than just that. this is everything to me. thank you for listening. <3

i'd fuck off if you'd just ask me
but everybody else just stands there, laughing
i really thought this through
yeah, it's you
something bout the way you stab me
then patch up the wounds
kinda like it never happened

brass knuckles mounted on my fists
sweat n grease; let it drip
like a typhlosion, my body is molten
i will not let opportunity slip
it's all for the kid, that i had been
i fucking miss him, but i shouldn't let
adolescence turn to codependence
just how in the fuck did we grow up to this

i'm sorry if you don't like my voice
cause i don't either, i do not have a choice
i take a break for a couple days
then i come back, just to fill the void
i'm so annoyed by every noise
and a breath away from breathing poison
a leap of faith isn't what i'd take
just freefall into clairvoyance

i don't keep track of the shit i accomplish
trying my best to avoid being pompous
now the weight of the world's being pushed on the girl who had given me hope
for the things i had wanted
ain't that some bullshit
honesty lies in between the cracks
of what we deem that is evil
but we can't live without it
can't live without it

oh, it feels like i stall time
when i submerge myself in a foreign pathogen
all feels well, till i cross that path again
flicker the blood off your hands into mine
what an orthodox method of covering crime
i just wanna cry
she just wanna crash
just leave me behind
there's no going back

but, what if i fuck this up again
would you be my only friend
my mentality's kicking the bin
cause honesty lies within sin
with every thought, grows ornery tension
every night i'm a loss, and i'm building retention
stars don't cross if you don't pay attention
my tears don't drop if they're not worth a mention
you cannot feel what i feel.
she's probably not even real
i'm probably not even real
so i'm going in for the kill

i'd fuck off if you'd just ask me
but everybody else just stands there, laughing
i really thought this through
yeah, it's you
something bout the way you stab me
then patch up the wounds
kinda like it never happened

did it ever happen..

retention [prod. sorrow bringer]

this is not a british accent fuck u

produced by yungspoiler and daks9k

originally performed by 9tails

completely non profit

lyrics:

talking up just to talk backwards
actor
i remember when the enemies where not a factor
gotta move different cus of outbursts of my temper
i might be an asshole but the truths what matters
splatter
all my deep down thoughts get shattered
on my new reboks plant matter
and it coned out raw
smoke that spliff then wrote this song

holding in smoke face
blue man group 
loud way too loud
man it smell like poop
but enough about me
tell me more about you
did your friend text back?
did u link that dude?

treat him like a main or a strong number 2
u about to break with the weight on u
put the faith in him but he always falls thru
lately i just hope that im not that dude
u aint really done nothing bad say u (say who?)
i been getting pew pewed every other song
drop
drop bombs and support gonna cease i guess
profit increase so does everybody's needs i guess
vampires when i bleed i guess
when i fuck off now u fuck me i guess
smoke my weed then kiss ur teeth whats next

im sorry friend
could we make amends? 
its the second call 
but ima call again
im on a variety of shit
its only 2pm
bottles concious n spliff
all beside me n the whip

i want decemeber 
there wasnt as many plans
that i felt bad for missing
to really see what i can
do with these hands
do with this brain 
and the subject matter inside
u leave im working
im eager
something i could never hide
something i could never hide
no
no

i get too deep in it
mind overdrive
my thoughts override
as fear overrides my shit
coarse cough got me fucked up
with the blood spit
yuck

some_ missed_ calls_ (yungspoiler x daks9k)

[+ Tosha]

1st - @user-411557229 
2nd - @northshoremusic 
3rd - @emptychest 
4th - @imperial223
5th - @strivemusicau 
6th - @caspywaspy 
7th - @soulfadexo 
8th - @x1fern 
9th - @noxious-nights 
10th - @navyxower 
11th - @shizukesaaa 
12th - @hoeplessboy

Holding Onto Something [+ Tosha x Kev]

𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜 𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚎𝚍

prod by. @domesticsoul

'tiedyed' ep
10/27

thank you for being here. 
take care

(it's way too damn bright out)
i know
it's always i don't know
idk, idk, i don't..

i feel the worst
reheat the burns
shoot down the birds
show me you hurt
care bout me less
don't feel distressed
don't recollect, proclaim me as dead
i'm recondite in all of their eyes
believe me, i've tried
the fuck would i lie
line after line, tongue's getting dry
water to hydrate
my subconscious, it migrates
fluttered past in the writing
eating less carbohydrates
sleeping less got me dying
note and pens all that i see
in a cold sweat from the sights seen
sights seen..
i don't wanna do no sightseeing, no..

every day means less than the last
always puttin off, task after task
just to grasp, 'cause i've heard enough
trash from the last pass back, i'm the burden
i've felt wrong for so long
can't get a word in

rain check;
she told me we should make a reign check
bellow out my frustrations
etching out these elations
now i'm fine, 'till i break, yeah
now i've calmed, feel it in my palms now
a couple scorn clouds
cry a storm out, with no warning
it's important;
you seem to know them 'till you stay foreign
(stay foreign)

so i guess i'll put my trust in the darkness
we talk a lot, bustin' chops over toxins
i hear my thoughts pushing me to be heartless
missin' my shots, wouldn't think i'm a marksman
fuck love, i'm misunderstood
filtering light into words overlooked
i disapprove and rebuke how they're crooked
i just went weak in the knees, now i'm puking

one sunset at a time
another day a new vice
show me you care without dragging your hair
through grease trails and the lice
it must be my mind that's gotten so distant
plenty surround but they always low pitch
or don't get the picture; fragile demeanor
prone to be withered, but never stay with

laugh it off like you always do
no surface shit, up the magnitude
let the ground crack 'till you fall back
from the forecast, as the magma spews
got hot veins and a cold brain
as i fuck up my stability
you can't drown out what's already sunken
i don't want there to be room for me

here we go again
meet another end
reinvent your head like second nature
lose it to a friend, who wasn't quite your friend
people only plead when it's on paper
well how about that
dirty mousepads
unaware of how i got here
did i steer clear, or was i pulled back?

every day means less than the last
always puttin off, task after task
just to grasp, 'cause i've heard enough
trash from the last pass back, i'm the burden
i've felt wrong for so long
can't get a word in

downcast (p. domesticsoul)

LATE BIRTHDAY demo

thank you for listening 
<3
@irby
@jolst
https://soundcloud.com/trechorboy

so lemme tell you what my life is like 
i stay up till the morning i can’t sleep at night 
i’m always waking up with a teary eye
lie to everyone n say i’m alright 

i’m way too fucking paranoid 
warning signs in my eyes i let my mind destroy 
i hate the feeling that my body gets 
every day i feel the same n i wish i could rest

i’m sick of feeling this anxiety 
worry about when you’ll replace me 
it’s getting hard to feel a heartbeat 
i hate the way that it controls me 

i hate the way that it controls me

trech:
give me until the end of the day to gather up all my things
i don’t know where im going 
or what it might bring
ill get out of your hair for the last time
ill disappear into the past time

i don’t go to sleep until its seven in the morning
its hard to rest easy when you’re mourning
life is like a circle it has no point 
and now im spinning all around in my room to this joint

worry (w/ trechor boy) (prod. irby & jolst)

it gets hard to breathe
https://soundcloud.com/crackxlizard
https://soundcloud.com/hellahaunted
mastered by: https://soundcloud.com/trechorboy


so is he everything
wanna fall in love
get a wedding ring
taking back all the memories you got from me 
when i look at the past yeah, it gets hard to breathe
i bet he's giving you everything
it's killing me

wake up, i don't wanna wake up 
don't wanna live another day feeling the fake love
and they like wait up, i don't wanna wait up
i keep breaking apart
i'll take the pain, love

do you treat him like me now
say he's the worst now
sending heart eyes while he's falling asleep now

i don't wanna wait till i break down
haunt me like a ghost until i'm bringing the knife out

worry (w/ trechor boy) (prod. irby & jolst)

skele

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