this hits so well, the emotions in this song are amazing 🥺

I tried my very best,
it didn't go to plan,
it probably hurt you more,
all you wanted was a friend,
to you I was never that


You're chasing waterfalls,
Please catch me when I fall,
pretend that you're in love again,
like everybody else
and ive been off these drugs again i dont care abt my health

And I suck, at types,
I always seem to be lied to,
when we fight, your eyes,
they change, its like I don't know you

Waterfalls (prod. Hieloways)

lyrics

I hope u been well
i hope u eat well
I think I got myself addicted 
to that tree smell
I know u mean well
But I don't need help
I find myself inside this drink
I feel my heart swell 

I'm back on my shit back on the drink
Turn up these cups while I'm lighting up blunts
And I'm all in my job all with the gang
No need to rob either way we get paid
It's something do, blow smoke till I'm blue
And if I've got this time then I'll spend it with u
It's all the time now
i spend it with all the lights out

back on my own i been ready to go
life in the gutter’ll make u miss home
i know i need u
but honey i’ll never admit to
memory shorter whenever i smoke
this isnt healthy oh baby i know
i cant ever leave u
but you’ll probably tell me i need to

but i dont wanna wanna
i been tryin rly hard
n i dont wanna wanna
its gettin harder every day
n i dont wanna wanna
yea u can ask if im ok
i hope im gna b
thats what i wanna b

lover lover
uve always had a knack for placing blame on
others 
others those eyes are shining and shes quite the up and comer
comer
why she always tryna fight its such a bother
bother
placing faith in others

i hope u eat well ft. decks (jolst)

1 (jolst x caves)

a mutual sickness report

With mr. decks <3 (soundcloud.com/decksmusic)

Greenwood:

But you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t know

The lights getting dim and the darks getting in on its own

But you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t know

That I’m barely him and this house barely feels like a home

 
I hit the function at midnight, but it’s so done

And I couldn’t wait til you show up

And lately I’m holding out so much

But its only you that I dream of
("cuz when i fall asleep, ur the one i dream of")
 

With all of the lames around me but its not real

And know that I tripped a few times, but you know me

And I never could say no but I want to

And know that I’m in so deep, I just want you

 

(still breathing, I’m still breathing now)

But you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t know

(I’m here so please just hear me out)

The lights getting dim and the darks getting in on its own

(still breathing, I’m still breathing now)

But you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t know

(I’m here so please just hear me out)

That I’m barely him and this house barely feels like a home

decks:

or a heart

we’re apart

at the seams



we’re in love

from the start

i’m above

ur between



and the light

dimming now

say it loud

it can hurt sometimes but


how

in the night

falling out

its an awful time, what


can i do to mend what i have broken?

i take back all the words i’ve spoken

Both:
(still breathing, I’m still breathing now)

But you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t know

(I’m here so please just hear me out)

The lights getting dim and the darks getting in on its own

(still breathing, I’m still breathing now)

But you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t, you wouldn’t know

(I’m here so please just hear me out)

That I’m barely him and this house barely feels like a home

Softening (w/ decks)

@strivemusicau
@shizukesaaa
@autumndropsdead
@torvamia

(strivesad)
Caught in a cage with this endless pain
caught up to my age now I’m getting paid
Depression stays high and now the feelings changed
pour another bottle all apon my grave

you’ve been building roads
I’m building settlements

I keep craving another fucking serotonin hit
let’s flip the script

I don’t need no alliby
come with me and stay the night
Fighting for my life I think I’m doing fine

Ripped clothes now I’m going home
got these problems cause I feel alone
keep me in my zone

(shizu)
beamer swerving 
cuz i deserve the worst shit
bet she gon hit me up w/ 'love u but this isnt working'
might fuck around my blade till i negate the serotonin
now watch the liquid dripping red off slitted wrists, still frozen
find another guy and leave me dying w/ no notice
no i was never that man but fans in my dms saying im chosen
it gets hard to speak every want when everyone is seeing you choking
when words go wasting the space of audio waves to leaving me broken"

(autie)
my conscious is ever so heavy
i've been so cautious ever since you left
i've been holding myself down, with this self doubt
but nevertheless
i swear that i'll know when you need me
you know i'm right there when you're hearing that ringing
i'm patient a bit, but waiting's a bitch
i wish i could split and fuck up my breathing
but if there's anyone out there like me
smite like a god do and make me undying
bottle my goods for a world that is dying
plenish a helt that is tattered with lies
'cause i see through them every single minute
proof is in my dome, that's why i'm livid
tell me that you love him 'till i'm finished
i repel and let them be forgiven

(torva)
smoke until my chest hurts, til my lungs burn
think ill die soon, think ill go first
now my head hurts, never heard worse
if i lose you, need a gold hearse

never fuck it up, bitch i run it up
i go fucking crazy
til i do enough
keep my tommy tucked, never losing love
think i need some help
fore' i lose my trust

Cage w/ strivesad, shizukesa, autumndropsdead & torvamia [+ Tied For Silver x flesh]

shoutout my homie for bein on this! @notaheroo

lyrics:

i’ve been drowning my sorrows in the bottom of bottles
she said i should relax and not to go full throttle 
baby just calm down and i’ll be gone by tomorrow
you say your heart has been hollowed

but have you looked at me lately?
i’m the one who needs a saving grace
her eyes they pierce so painfully
i see your face and i’m back in that place

they’ve left me with nowhere to go
i’ve been broken down and on my own
my shoulders are crushed from the weight of it all

and you’ve been laughing at me waiting for me to fall
and i lack the motivation to force myself to crawl
you held back information knowing that it’s your fault
clarification is shown behind the walls
a now known revelation planned to kill my soul

it’s hard not to fold 
underneath the mold
of what i was always told and what i’m feeling
the seasons are changing again

oh, changing again
oh, can you tell me where the times been?

(notahero)

can u hear me coming baby?
open up the front door
i know time is infinite
but i don’t think i got much more
my bones and back grow sore
u tell me i should fight
pain gets defied when i look up in ur eyes
sorrow gets diffused into energy all u gotta do is fight
it’s hard enough waking up
be my saving grace tonight
anxiety riddles me when i feel my lungs fucking up
the pressure belittle me when i don’t think that i’m blowing up
but riddle me this baby
how come i ain’t never show no signs of giving up?

full throttle w/ notahero (R3DQX x Luffy)

prod secre and prophecy
mixed/mastered by me

Lyrics:

blood drips from my eyes
i still hate our mutual ties
heart beats fast while lines of powder
find their way inside 
i decipher lies
from the look upon your eyes
and i could find my way
but i won’t make on my own
i spill
my heart out on the line
i cry 
more when i can’t decide 
and i wish
that i made up my mind
before i went and 
carved your life from out my time

well you shouldn’t
and for that
i shouldnta stood it
you brought it up
shoulda kept that shit inside
cause how the fuck
you gon wish that i had died 
like i’m not perfect 
but i got an ounce of pride
and i still hold it in my heart
the words you swore were not a lie
but it’s still hard to decipher
i gotta dislodge the knife first 
gotta dislodge the knife first
not really much of a fighter 
and i hold my tongue back
but you jump at the spark of a lighter

_brighter_mood_ (secre x prophecy)

old asf thing from the vault w/ @torvamia <3 

luv yall thank you so fkn much for the support lately. shit gives my life meaning

dnt wake up ft. torvamia (methboiswag)

wanted this forever, i've been wishing
packed it up in boxes moving east to try and fix it
silent with your parents
i know they'd never say it

focus on the changes, growing in the silence
hard to even recognise my body from the mileage
everything you're scared of
but what if it was made up?

tracing on your arm, getting closer to the lookout,
ripples in the water, we've been kicking in since sundown
to live in this forever
what if i never get better?
cause i can't take it anymore
i can't take it anymore
i can't take it anymore

does anybody know?
the only thing i asked you
lose it when you say
'does anybody have to?'
cause i've been in the dark
but never so invested
to hide it from the world
what i thought had been the best thing

and maybe it just fizzles out on hollow ground
scars that we had made in doubt, ashamed of now
your body in the darkness
like anything could stop it
and i just hate this fucking town and what we found
now my hairs been falling out, i think about
anything to hold you
and know that you were there too

cause i can't take it anymore
i can't take it anymore
i can't take it anymore

cause i can't take it anymore
i can't take it anymore
i can't take it anymore

1 (jolst x caves)

safeatlast

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