prod. Jojo Centineo
vocal mix / art by me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Sfzkyea34w

i look & don't recognize what i see around me
& everything was a lie that you'd ever tell me
i kept it bottled inside but it isn't healthy
shouldn't have let it all out but i couldn't help it
i hold my head to the sky
(when it start to drown me)
left me alone here to die
(had to find myself then)
devil wearing a disguise
(said that you would help me)
praying to god that he keep me alive

calling all my plans off
watching the world fall apart between my fingers
i keep my hands closed
right where we left off
pick up the story i would but all the ink inside of my pen's gone 
i'm going places i never thought i would've before
i tried replacing you couldn't bear the weight of my loss
send me an angel to come & take my spirit above 
don't be afraid of the ghost that i think i might become

i think i'm running out of luck
watching my whole entire world fall down

Angel (prod. JOJO)

cover of the lo-fi version of a song that’s been on repeat since high school :)
hope y’all enjoy <3

artwork done by @se.b.drawin on instagram
mixed + mastered by @skullkiddxx

lyrics:


I think you'll notice when things become different
The good vibes in our lives won't feel so consistent
And, less becomes more 'cause the weight is too heavy
I swim in the water that's breaking your levee

The way that you left me's all right, it's all right
If I argue the point then we yell and we fight
And I won't be home for the rest of the night
You might hate my words but you know that I'm right
You know that I'm right

This is your life, there's no way to run from it
The doubt in your brain, or the pain in your stomach
I only have the one complaint at the moment just
Don't paint me black when I used to be golden

The way that you left me's all right, it's all right
If I argue the point than we yell and we fight
And I won't be home for the rest of the night
You might hate my words but you know that I'm right
You know that I'm right

“Clairvoyant - Lo-Fi” Cover 🧚🏼‍♀️🥀 (The Story So Far & Mik)

Ice The Pain w/ Cyzun (capsctrl)

Prod. @prodneverforever

you're a disappointment
I refuse to talk to you cause all of that is pointless
Part the sea like I am Moses
Ripping hearts in two was a result of being honest
But I should've seen this coming
Every time the bottle touched your lips and it was poison
You would change into a different person
Using all your anger change your name to Bruce Banner
All the arguments and fighting
I was in the middle of a field and you were lightning
Waiting for it all to strike me
Sometimes I would stand there with a kite that I was flying
Plant the seed and feed it water
Growing into ivy when it should've been a flower
Rashes all along your body
I will take it as a sign that you were never sorry

Where did things go wrong
Or were they like this all along
Fast forward
The part that keeps you far from home

I'm no saint myself
Things I've done can't help
The person that you wanted me to be
You'll find it deep inside the enemy
Write the story out in cursive
Freed you from your cage for you to bring out all the serpants
Now I know who's problematic
Slaughter every snake who took my loyalty for granted
Time to split the atom
Desecrating worlds only you could ever fathom
Lay you down into the chasm
Everyone will leave you that's the curse of post mortem 

Where did things go wrong
Or were they like this all along
Fast forward
The part that keeps you far from home

lay u down into the chasm

im over you but these are some things i still wanted to get off my chest. i hope you see this, take care of yourself.
-
[lyrics:]
i remember when i walked you home
but you left me last november, then i turned so cold
its been more than a year since we called, i shed a tear
no i dont want you back but just know that im here for you
these are some things that im afraid to say 
cus the other girls just always made me feel ashamed
but thats the way i feel, something i cant change
i just hope you healed from the pain i made you feel

now i see you with a smile on your face
another guy on your waist
but its fine, its okay
you deserve to be happy
good that you left me
txnshi the black sheep
dies in the backseat soon
too soon
thats what i learned from shrooms
its true
so cruel
this world is so damn cruel
but you
yea you
i know that you are not like that
my head
is full of things i never said

i remember when we met online 
in december 2016, fuck i hate that time
cus my moms mother died in her arms and she cried
such a horrible life for a 12 year old child
but then we met and my life started to feel liveable
back on track that i lost like its invisible
you took my hand, showed me life is not that miserable
wish it lasted but i did unforgivable things

and now we both moved on and we dont talk no more
i guess we both lost a lot but life is going on
do you still think of me in the evening breeze?
oh tell me what are we? what do you want us to be?

now i see you with a smile on your face
another guy on your waist
but its fine, its okay
you deserve to be happy
good that you left me
txnshi the black sheep
dies in the backseat soon
too soon
thats what i learned from shrooms
its true
so cruel
this world is so damn cruel
but you
yea you
i know that you are not like that
my head
is full of things i never said

17/12/2016 (killedmyself)

movies w/ irby & jolst

original song by @sewerperson and @branwen
https://soundcloud.com/sewerperson/it-must-be-a-pain-branwen

lyrics:

She's a grape vine burner
She wants a parking lot live in murderer

Self medicated by the smell of storm
Id have a blade left in my gut and they would say im armed
How come every champion rather lose instead
He wins the game but loses life when ego fills his head
Hand to hand combat never works
When right beside u lay the weapons of the universe
Check it five times then I close the hatch
She spoke the language of the world into voided black

I know well we know that u won’t stay long
Cause ur better than most but u hold ur tongue
The rain turns snow every time ur gone
It must be a pain living this stuck up
So Be grateful at least when u waste my time
Still im thankful at least that ur wasting mine
Why breath when Im able to choke on words
But they bounce from her face and they land in the dirt

Carried to the cemetery I could tell she’s still alive
Wood soot dirt
Block her body from our 9-5
I could be the mercenary u could be the better guy
He could not flirt
With the image of an other side
Blood on my brain broke thru my skull
Giving back life to the animals
Strawberry colour on feathery coats
I’m the shoe box u cannot tip toe
I told u I meant it
Girl that’s why I said it
I can’t be much clearer than that don’t u get it

I know well we know that u won’t stay long
Cause ur better than most but u hold ur tongue
The rain turns snow every time ur gone
It must be a pain living this stuck up
So Be grateful at least when u waste my time
Still im thankful at least that ur wasting mine
Why breath when Im able to choke on words
But they bounce from her face and they land in the dirt

Just about 20 feet down in the well I rest
I sport a smile stuck forever with this shell in my head
He dips down to my mouth to see what I had said
As I breathed once again they could hear me cry

I know well we know that u won’t stay long
Cause ur better than most but u hold ur tongue
The rain turns snow every time ur gone
It must be a pain living this stuck up
So Be grateful at least when u waste my time
Still im thankful at least that ur wasting mine
Why breath when Im able to choke on words
But they bounce from her face and they land in the dirt

it must be a pain (cover)

Wasted Youth (Prod. RODGER)

when I look into ur eyes
I can see thru ur disguise
but I still can't get u out of my mind 

and im thinking that I need you
but this love shit I can't redo
but I think I need u right by my side 

and I know ur fake I know u don't
love me but I still have some hope
I live in dreams to help me cope
the fantasies just go to show 

I never was the one for u but u were the right one for me
my desperation blinded me
u changed the man im meant to be so 

fuck you, you don't rlly fucking care
you can listen to my songs maybe you'll feel my despair
you can tell me i aint good enough but im trying my best
if u gave me some space then I might just get some rest so

fuck you, i don't rlly fucking care
you can blow me fake kisses ill just leave then in the air
you can treat me like your pedalstool and use me for my songs
just to show it to ur friends u were fake all along 

one two shawty said she'd come thru
when I turn my back middle fingers like a jutsu
bitch u switching up like the pitches on my autotune
and we turning this shit up u not invited to my bedroom 

shawty u fake u a fraud
I miss u but not a lot
u left me but ill never rot
I'll never let u break my heart 

im too weak to even kill myself 
so don't worry I won't bother to ask for ur help 

seasons change when its cold imma stumble home
when it rains when it pours ill be all alone
don't worry about me ill be on my own
I just don't think that ill last too long 

and I know ur fake I know u don't
love me but I still have some hope
I live in dreams to help me cope
the fantasies just go to show 

I never was the one for u but u were the right one for me
my desperation blinded me
u changed the man im meant to be so 

fuck you, you don't rlly fucking care
you can listen to my songs maybe you'll feel my despair
you can tell me i aint good enough but im trying my best
if u gave me some space then I might just get some rest so

fuck you, i don't rlly fucking care
you can blow me fake kisses ill just leave then in the air
you can treat me like your pedalstool and use me for my songs
just to show it to ur friends u were fake all along

Fake Kisses (p. Bhertuy)

Everything Mixed By Me

Feat https://soundcloud.com/joshiguess
Prod https://soundcloud.com/despairintoashes

Nightmares 😈 w/JoshIGuess (Prod. DESPAIRINTOASHES)

mixing, mastered and made better by the amazing @mvpdyl   :*

pain



lyrics:
You switched up 
but I stayed the same 
you fucked up now I’m betrayed 
no one left for you to blame 
selfishness not no mistake nah 
did you ever care 
we’re you ever there 
stuck inside my fucking head dealing with my fear 
now I stop and stare but there’s no one there 
did you ever care 
were you ever fucking there  
thought I had no clue 
you made me waste my youth 
so I’mma take this pain 
and I bring it in my booth
cause i was there for u
what the fuck you do 
yeah you switch the fuck up on me
(hook)

it must be a pain (cover)

Sora

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