empty_l1fe w/ fridvy (kubsy)

no one can stop me ft. killmesumday *back2thapast + northeastlights*

and its the end, i guess ill see you elsewhere.
-+- mix & master, lyrics by me
prod.pekarot  -+-
(lyrics)
take me away from here
save me from this place,
im falling
its so hard

so far away from here,
i know that i am falling
its so hard
oh
unaware my dear
i will go where the end nears
you see me, and im falling

the pouring rain
and it tears out my heart
i dont know if ill be alive
deep in the sand and ill suffocate
the hourglass spills, i guess time is out
emptying everything i did
and i know that its all for nothing
know that i couldnt ever give,
and im stomping on the help to save me

so far away from here,
i know that i am falling
its so hard
and i dont know where i am heading
i guess its the end of it all

made may 6th 2022

Its So Hard (pekarot)

hbd george *recyclebin + star*

Resting Place feat foreign forest + ashes prod. hxllxw

title track off a super long project i'm making currently

Lyrics:
One more day I should see
All the things we went through
In the love that I share
Like it was all for you

I see everything fall around me
I see inside the kaleidoscope
I’m trapped with no way around it
Just like how would you ever know

I don’t wanna be that guy now
I just don’t like the man i am
So poisoned with the lies
Gathered by the words I hate
It’s so obvious to me
That life is going backwards
Which I have a chance to live
And do so without you

One more day I should see
All the things we went through (without you)
In the love that I share
Like it was all for you

I see everything fall around me
I see inside the kaleidoscope
I’m trapped with no way around it
Just like how would you ever know

I see everything fall around me
I see inside the kaleidoscope
I’m trapped with no way around it
Just like how would you ever know

kaleidoscope.

kaleidoscope. [+ yungspoiler]

Mixed/Mastered By Me & https://soundcloud.com/auby4rc
-
Prod By https://soundcloud.com/stezzyxl
-
(Lyrics)
-
[Chorus]
i always think about oh I'm just an obstacle 
no need to worry girl i know that you are comfortable 
that's how i feel and you were so dramatic girl 
don't know what's real i need to find the cause of it 

[Auby]
i came to plead again
please end my suffering 
looks like my hands are tied
in the palm of your hand
let me take solace that youll be here with me
im done with all this constant wondering
cant look you into your eyeshouldnt be very surprised
sorry that im a mess
i promise i tried my best
living in a web of lies
without you i wouldnt survive
no type of medicine could fix what is happening

[Chorus]
i always think about oh I'm just an obstacle 
no need to worry girl i know that you are comfortable 
that's how i feel and you were so dramatic girl 
don't know what's real i need to find the cause of it x2

[Verse]
seeing all the messages saying that you hated me
i can barely sleep at night i find it hard to fucking breathe 
and i just wanted you closer 
these lonely thoughts are getting colder 

[Outro]
and i just wanted some closure holding each other till we're warmer 
seeing all the messages saying that you hated me
 i can barely sleep at night i find it hard to fucking breathe

breathe w/ auby (stezzyxl)

self-prod

ibleedicare - https://soundcloud.com/slaughter-tone-records
epitome - https://soundcloud.com/failure404
xipz - https://soundcloud.com/xipz_sad

Encore w/ IBleedicare, epitomeoffailure & lil XipZ

[Non-Profit]
Mixed/Mastered By Me
-
Produced By https://soundcloud.com/nciku
-
(Lyrics)
perfect for me 
I'm always crying in the cold nights
this is something we gotta talk about 
but some days just get harder 
i don't wanna do this no more
i want you , you want me 
we're such a perfect match 
i know we won't collapse 
don't get bored of me 
i know that I'm too much 
i'm trying to be perfect

it's always silent in the cold night 
the weather is so cold without you 
and i love you 
don't want this to end 
I'll hold you till the end
just notice that i care 
i trust you with my heart
i just wanna be there 
i just love you way too much

i love you (nciku)

(New version of this will be postponed until further notice but this will stay up until the new version comes out) but my voice is cracking cause I’m a bit sad about it :/
lryics:
did you want me to please you?
did you want me to tease you?
cause you knew that i didn't want to
yea you didn't know that i didn't want to
it's nothing new
why didn't you see me for me?
or my body?
i hate that i see everything after

the after effects are coming
i knew you were onto something 
the after effects are coming

didn't see the red flags
i really thought you had my back
now i can't even sleep at night
knowing what you took was mine

you took what's mine x2 
now that's left behind x2

the after effects are coming
i can see it all ending
the after effects are killing me 
it's empty
it's everything

everything is ending *acoustic preview*

It's been far too long since I got Teddy on one of my tracks.

I haven't been doing well in regards to my mental health lately, so this song paints a small picture of how I've been feeling inside my head these days.

Lyrics:

(HeyLee)
I jump to a freefall, end it all
Everything that I see seems so small
Everything that I do doesn’t matter
You got my heart going pitter patter 
Bloody spatter, take my hand
Razor blade is my only friend
Things that never seemed to matter
You got my heart going pitter patter

Explain away the reasons I can’t find my way back to the way I used to be before
You changed me, and I don’t know why
I’ll starve myself to see the ribs poking out of stomach like a sore
And I can only bring myself to cry
I don’t see a reason to be here anymore
But reasons lead to treason that I cannot ignore

I jump to a freefall, end it all
Everything that I see seems so small
Everything that I do doesn’t matter
You got my heart going pitter patter 
Bloody spatter, take my hand
Razor blade is my only friend
Things that never seemed to matter
You got my heart going pitter patter

(Teddy)
My health doesn’t matter
I’ve been going too hard
See a blade jump to my skin
It goes “oo la la”
Like “oo la la”
I’m addicted to it
Like “oo na na”
Like “oo na na”
I’m tired of coping the way that I have the last couple of years, um
Starving myself because food disgusts me, I hate the feeling
I hurt myself because you won’t do it, jump from the building
Freefall, heart beats, love is an illness

(HeyLee)
I jump to a freefall, end it all
Everything that I see seems so small
Everything that I do doesn’t matter
You got my heart going pitter patter 
Intrusive thoughts will be my end
Rewind the clock so we can start again
Any of this even matter?
It makes my heart go pitter patter

Pitter Patter! (feat. teddyboi)| prod. shinju x gauge

[Est. 2018]

Projects:
Kid Skully [2018-2020, 2024-Now]
Soulfade [2021-Now]

Founder of:
@ghxstcollective [2020-Now]
@solareclipsewav [2022-now]

Associating with:
@timeless-archive, @333collective (2021-2023)

kaleidoscope. [+ yungspoiler]

Soulfade

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