New private playlist

listen to

A new one

Monthly tastes is my way of making playlists that include music I like but don't fit under a specific genre, and can only be categorized by me liking them. By making them in monthly playlists, I get to track my taste of music over time, and it's cool to look back and think about why I listened to certain songs, and it adds variety to what I listen to.

Happy 1 year anniversary of monthly tastes. This month has been amazing and I found a lot of great songs and started finding ways to express myself. I hope you like the creativity I had in creating the title of this playlist.

Enjoy.

february tastes, II

shit i like rn

self-produced; this one's pretty cute 

guitar recorded on my fender tele 
drums from a few different sample packs

this is a sunny sky, this is a starry night 
this is an afternoon i'll spend inside your arms, held tight 
this is a question mark, this is a final thought 
this is a happy ending snuck into the epilogue 
this is a seperate building, this is the journey there 
this is the scenic route, this is your messy hair 
this is a promise kept, an honored lesson, taught it to you 
through the momunental light alive inside your amour suit, and... 
this is the reason i've been shaking when i speak 
always terribly afraid to make mistakes and make you leave 
it's a shame i'm scared of heights, 'cause when you sweep me off my feet 
i feel the ground beneath me start to sink into the sea 
i can feel the clouds above me coming closer to my touch 
i can almost taste the heavens, but compared to you, it's much 
the same as everything else... another book on a shelf 
it's just too hard to explain, so i'm repeating myself, like... 

this is a broken record, this is a broken record 
this is a broken record, you'll always know me better 
this is a broken record, this is a broken record 
this is a broken record, so i'll be yours forever 

this is the celebration, this is the party hat 
this is the cellophane in which my heart is wrapped 
and i'm peeling it back, 'cause i'm feeling the love 
this is absolute bliss, this can fit like a glove 
this is peace on the earth, this is me, what it's worth 
i'm not a hundred percent sure, but still 
this here, this is a final draft, this is an epitath 
for every negative emotion on a seperate path 
this is the safest feeling ever to be felt 
it's a message in the morning that intends to make you melt 
and honestly, this is my magnum opus, this is a story book 
where all the illustrations have super-friendly sorta look 
a cordial shook hand at an important event 
with stainless steel silverware and a porcelain dish 
it's the weight of the pull inside of a torrent of fish 
a metaphor used precisely to make it more than it is 

this is a broken record, this is a broken record 
this is a broken record, you'll always know me better 
this is a broken record, this is a broken record 
this is a broken record, so i'll be yours forever 

this is a broken record, this is a broken record 
this is a broken record, you'll always know me better 
this is a broken record, this is a broken record 

art by bennie (www.instagram.com/cozylile)

download <3

broken record

FEATURING @BARRENWASTE
PRODUCED BY @KILLEDMYSELF

...and the days will continue coming (feat. barren) (prod. killedmyself)

...and the days will continue coming

i dont wanna waste my time

Thank you for everyone who has supported me and my friends! i will miss you flowars <3

Links-
@guardinmusic
@daddydandy

flowars x guardin x yung van - lavender dreams (Prod. charlie c)

Let You Down

i've never felt less like myself 
than when i'm naked in reflections 
truly wish that i could exit this body 

and it's coming on again 
starting to crush again 
can't wait to fuck up every friendship that i've made 

but i've never felt more like myself 
than when i'm drunk alone 
at 3 a.m. again 

'cause my stupid brain can't help but get attached 
to every person whose attention 
even barely starts to drift a bit my way 

oh, here we go again 
here we go again

sorry

here we go again

Nothing in Return

Single released by Tree and Minnesota
April 21st, 2011

Next Level Shit (ft. Minnesota) [Explicit]

Helpless

produced by @mt_fujitive

lyrics:

life has got me feeling discombobulated, in place of common phrases
all i say are awkward statements in every conversation
often sitting cautious, pacing, dropping frames in talks with strangers
making observations, in that awful cadence
i've been rather quiet since a sophomore
every time my voice comes out my mouth, it sounds like nails on a chalkboard
saving pieces shattered as my age increases faster
i can make my thesis matter if i learn to fuckin' talk more

but that's just an inkling, small talk is always shrinking
and this ship will always sink until we fill in all the gaps
i've made some dumb decisions and evaded inhibitions
digging graves for my ambitions just to make it on the map
which seems ironic at present, given my title
periodically stepping through this recital
i've practiced a thousand times, messaging with my idols
and definitely sounding like a dumbass when i try tho

i treat a soundcloud page like a diary
and push away all the people who inspire me--sorry
so afraid of the person i should try to be
and it seems, by now, they should kinda be sorry

flowers ep

discombobulated (prod. mt. fujitive)

we could have been everything

Stream on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/6hrUfX7wsi7bSUJNxVKbi4?si=OR6MWOowSsCWyHRlqECuGQ

Dear Dad why’d you have to go so soon
It feels like I never really got to know you
You lost track of ur life when your pops passed
Tryna drink away your problems through a shot glass 
I just hope that I don’t fall into the same path
I’ve had addictive personality since way back
It’s in our blood some times I really hate that
But we’re alike in other ways I wouldn’t change that 
You loved work you put that over everything
You even put it and liquor over a wedding ring
They say you never know what you had til' it’s gone
That’s why I’m writing you this song 
I've been stressing and second guessing decisions
Learning lessons and growing up gaining wisdom 
You’re out the picture this never was in my vision 
You helped me buy my equipment 
You shared my songs and you listened 
When I was younger heard arguing in the kitchen
Moving around a lot houses always switching 
As I got older began to see the addiction 
Mom tried stay to calm couldn’t stick with it
I don’t blame her but sometimes I blame myself 
Like there was someway or somehow I could of helped like damn 
Maybe if I called the ambulance a little faster 
We wouldn’t be in this disaster 
Instead of staring at the blood on the walls like it’s plaster
But I guess it doesn’t matter
Grandma’s crying in the arms of the pastor 
Not all stories get a happy ever after
Me and my brother stuck together that’s for life too 
Mama found new love met a nice dude
Things sucked but I always had to fight thru
How’s the weather in heaven hope it’s a nice view
Nowadays everything ain’t the same 
A lot of problems are bottled up in my brain 
I never thought that I would have to feel this way 
But I can’t help it I’m breaking down every day 
I don’t wanna get upset I don’t think I should regret 
Holding on to what is left hope ur happy looking down
I just wanna make u proud even tho ur not around 
I know you’ll always be there I know that you’ll always care
So I love you and I swear even though we weren’t prepared
Maybe this was meant to be this is what you meant to me
I won’t forget the memories 
I won’t forget the memories
Rest in peace yeah

Dear Dad (prod. Jakkyboi)

https://soundcloud.com/lilsadeyes


https://soundcloud.com/montydatta

I’m drowning I can see the ark 
Sky opens up, world falls apart 
Da da da da da da da
Da da da da
I’m
Rocking all black strings on an old guitar 
With my all black jeans and my all black heart
Da da da da da da da
Da da da da da da da

Put me in an all white room and bind my hands
Tell me I’m no good till I understand but
Your demands mean nothing 
I need a Zoloft lil to even feel something 
Put me on a red eye flight and I’ll leave it all as you wave goodbye
She asking where the time goes 
Girl you might as well be asking why the wind blows 
But you see me through these all black windows 
Chilling with the sharks while you swimming with the minnows 
And I’m sorry but I chose my fate 
Big fish ‘round town done being the bait
It’s weighing on my all black lungs
But yours always right so I’ll hold me tounge
Got an all black soul with an all black prayer
I’m the all black sheep with the all black stars 

Hook 

Ripped black jeans and tears from sad eyes
I guess I’m alright I guess I’ll be fine 
I guess I’m real stressed I’m
Best when offline
Cause I suffocate when I talk to you 
It sucks to feel like you don’t want to choose 
I choke so bad my face turns blue 
My heart’s gone dark from loving you 
I won’t speak cause you won’t listen 
You’re my cure but we’ve been distant 
You’re too cute and that’s too bad cause 
Love won’t clean this mess I have 
I’m over love but I’m not over us 
Im over love but I’m not over us

World Falls Apart - Ft Sadeyes Prod. Monty Datta

lyrics
—————————
u didn’t care like i thought u did
say u think im doin good
well its the opposite
fall back
get me off of this
death callin
show me where the coffin is

feelin bad but i know
if i try than i can
make my dreams come tru
like a star in the night
when it shines so bright
with the sky
& i think of u

& i know that
things aren’t always what they seem
i wanna go back
but i can only seem to do it when i sleep

i don’t like this
the feeling inside it
eats me alive
all the time
i cant fight this
indecisive
i feel like im dyin
pacin’ & whinin’
the tides keep on risin

& one day ill make this right
& one day
ill make my dreams come to life

produced by dead spyro

make my dreams come to life pt. 2 [prod. dead spyro]

turn out all the lights
baby it’s just you and me now
stay up every night 
we don’t ever need to sleep nah
you got me feelin right
where i need to be
baby lock eyes and
show me that you need me

i been thinkin bout you lately 
girl i know you want to
you can always slide by my place
you got my heart burning up babe
every single time that i lay
my eyes on your face

yeah i’m fallin for your body
and your mind too 
forget the past, 
we can leave it all behind you
i won’t let you feel alone again 
i won’t let you feel alone again, no

with your hand between my fingers 
i don’t ever wanna let go
yeah i’m mezmerized by your figure
never get tired of you at all, and

baby girl you should come through
we can do whatever you want to
just sit back and let me love you

turn out all the lights
baby it’s just you and me now
stay up every night 
we don’t ever need to sleep nah
you got me feelin right
where i need to be
baby lock eyes and
show me that you need me

put your body up against mine
couple hours we never look at the time
lay in bed as we watching the sun shine
through the curtains and passing the window blinds

yeah, and you’re so warm
in the middle of a winter night
so glad that i made you mine
i feel fine when you’re beside me

with your hand between my fingers 
i don’t ever wanna let go
yeah i’m mezmerized by your figure
never get tired of you at all, and

baby girl you should come through
we can do whatever you want to
just sit back and let me love you

turn out all the lights
baby it’s just you and me now
stay up every night 
we don’t ever need to sleep nah
you got me feelin right
where i need to be
baby lock eyes and
show me that you need me

SPOTIFY

i won't let you feel alone again

this is an old song, but it means a lot to me.

verse 1

last night
wasn’t my best night
my wrist looking like i got into a bear fight
i’m kinda scared 
because i really don’t feel right
i mean,
is everything supposed to be this bright? 
i might past out this time 
and i’m having flashbacks of my timeline
yo, i’m thinking that these cuts 
are way too deep
please help me,
i don’t wanna fall asleep.
and that’s when,
i heard the call on my phone
so i picked up 
because i’m all alone
and you didn’t even know 
you were just at home
so i put it to my ear and said hello
and you asked me if i was okay
then i said no.
not really today
then you told me,
you were heading my way
how did you know that i needed a save?
i’m just glad that it wasn’t too late

(hook)
do you know why i’m a mess
i’m never out of bed
it’s all inside my head
and on the stereo 
a song i listen while i bleed
i hope i never breathe
the way you look at me
you see right through my sleeves

verse 2

tell me how you do it though
girl i really wanna know
it’s not like i’m that public yo
i’m never on the radio
you treat my sleeves just like a ghost 
how do you know?
can you see my cuts?
do you watch them grow?
if it wasn’t for you
i’d be six feet deep
i’m strong now
but i once was weak
you know i’m hurting 
when we still don’t speak
your eyes froze 
from the blood in the sink
i’m sorry that i put you through this
but i promise that i’m on a new movement 
i might fall 
but i know i won’t lose it
so i thank you and look imma prove it
yeah

(hook)

sleeves (prod. haruhi) [unreleased]

fall against your wall (prod.irby)

Thank you for listening.


Produced by Odece : https://soundcloud.com/odece
Cover art by Ethan Grassel : https://twitter.com/EthanGrassel

Special thanks to TheBreathingBackwards || GoodByeWilson 
https://twitter.com/breathingback
https://twitter.com/goodbyewilson

Nobody [Prod. Odece]

@treetimee @guardinmusic

Pre release off of 'some boring, love stories' Pt. 2
Big shoutout to Guardin for killing the second verse!
Love u guys <3

Spotify

good for nothing | Feat. Guardin (Prod. Treetime)

Drums/Mix: @peterkuli
Guitar/Vocals: me

Wrote this song over a year ago while I was in Seattle. I was going through my first winter there and didn't really have any friends yet. I never had a reason to finish it, but when peter sent me the percussion it just fit so well. It's far from perfect, but I hope you like it! 

Also, relatable with all the cold weather this week lol

Spotify & iTunes

Tonight w/ Peter Kuli

You got me out my element like CO2 
Like CO2 (repeat)

You got me out my element like CO2 
Like CO2 (repeat)
I just wanna see you

Hey love what’s good with you
Flip flows yea I like too
Get fly yea I like too
Get high yea how bout you
How about you? 
You so on
Damn girl you so wrong 
Damn You so throwed
I’m out my zone

Hook

Shawty Im noticing you notice me, I noticed you too 
A nigga stay jazzy fresh like prince it makes sense, take me with you
You Nia like long If I’m coming too strong, we can take this slow too
Sitback and let this thing brew
Relax I play lambardi like 12 
I bet you missed that
It’s kool I get that 
Let’s cut the chit chat
Girl is you with that 
Break you off like kit kat 
XO like tic tac
Ten toes you down 
Like 3 times in a row?

Excuse me Just being honest I’m so aggressive these days
Can you blame me cuz that ass don’t match with your waist
Being passive is only an excuse for a lack of action 
don’t have much time to waste 
Too many ventures for me to make it a chase
I’m like miagi let’s kick it if it’s explicit
 thats too much for your taste 
Cuz ain’t no  pudding 
worth me catching a case
I got one rolled 
spark it lets take a trip to the moon, 
see the stars, or some place 
I’m shooting for anything 
to get in your space

Written by: Reed Pake
Vocals by: https://soundcloud.com/wetdaytimetable/
Produced by: https://soundcloud.com/tsii
Album art by: https://soundcloud.com/saintkales
Mixed/Mastered by: John Garcia

Lyrics:

Hook:
Never wanna be confined, be confined, be confined 
Wanna color out the lines, out the lines, out the lines/  
Now when I look out of my blinds, out my blinds, out my blinds
All I see is grey/
Eyes used to glisten with life, but I feel like that’s died/
Wishin’ for a better life, one where I’m not gettin’ dried/
Out of all ambition, what I’m missin’ is a little light/
Out of my window pane/

Verse:
Back when I was a kid I would sit and dream/
By my window seat listening to the winter breeze whistling/
With nothin’ but a pad and a pen to bleed/
All I’d need was a bit of ink to link with my mind and free/
Myself from my identity, shed my body and fly with ease/
Or become the mightiest king or a hero fighting enemies/
Whoever I’d pretend to be, it never felt pretend to me/
Whether I was an an entity zippin’ beyond infinity/
Or in a different century solvin’ a murder mystery/
I could escape my boredom that tended to be a trend for me/
But when I was scolded for livin’ in my mental imagery/
I let myself get molded into something that isn’t me/
‘Cause I was told it was time to rid of kiddish sensibilities/
And I let that shit get to me, ‘till I met all my friends, ya see/
They helped inspirit me and bring back what appeared to be/
That old energy back when I had nothin’ but a pad and a pen to bleed/
And pushed me not to dream to live, but rather to live to dream/

Hook:
Never will I be confined, be confined, be confined 
Coloring out of the lines, out the lines, out the lines
Now when I look out of my blinds, out my blinds, out my blinds
Great array of shades/
Eyes are glistenin’ with life, knowin’ who is  by my side/
Couldn’t have a better life, everything is feelin’ right/
Ambition and a mission, always see me up and beamin’ bright/
Out of my window pane/

Live to Dream (feat. JUAN) [Prod. TSII) - Single

Spotify/Apple Music

Live to Dream (feat. Juan) [prod. TSII]

okay (Prod. Yilo Mars)

just stop the torment
just cut me off and let me go
my pain’s been dormant
my heart can’t take this anymore

can’t stand the memories
can’t stand to see you anymore
so i’ll just get wasted
imma pass out and wake up on the floor

this was gonna be a song ‘bout how i missed you
how i used to feel love when i often reminisced you
but you turned the page like i never exist, yeah
now when i’m gone i know i won’t even be missed, yeah

i thought i found the one, but you were just in it for fun
you broke me down, then went back to who you were running from
(it) was just a fake love, you don’t know what you been doing
you made me hate this town, now i’m thinkin that i’ll be moving 

i was always one to post you on my stories girl
but you ain’t ever show me off to your friends or just to the world
i know it’s crazy but you got me thinking that i’m not enough
you say you love me, i see through your lies ‘cause i know you can’t bluff

I spent a week inside a white room,
Nurses gimme meds doctors checkin on my iq,
Hit my friends but nobody seem to come through, 
Runnin from the devil cause I seen him in my rear view

torment

sick of overthinking every night

made this one in like a day
sometimes it be like that
another production by the amazing @harvest

spotify

make this work (prod. harvest)

existing is exhausting, but im happy youre here

make this work (prod. harvest)

thebreathingbackwards