(TW: LOUD SOUNDS, SCREECHING AND DARK LYRICS!!) Bcuz I’m a Four ficitonkin x333

Four BFB playlist

hold my c4 
im about to blow it up from way back here
near where the things all emerge unscathed
with smirks on their face
theyre watching me make a fool out of me and you
but nothing ever smelled so good as these toxic fumes

so i breathe deep
take a whiff
fuck it all i ever wanted was more of this
im sure of it
ignore this shit its not important 
the more it sits the more potent it gets 
putrid ghost wants only sex 

ow! 
lost fight to another hologram
exciting news 
these revolutions may be damned
fuck a 3d copy 
im such a needy obviously- 
lock jaw, need it now
cant close my mouth it just keeps talking
quiet down! 
funny little lines form when i close my eyes 
i know its why i cant ever get to sleep on time 

whoa
exit and drown
no clip into another world and run around 
theres no consequences
a fair use view on life
i should try to make a bomb
spread thin on bread
im an imitation led on whim and deadly expectation
what the hell am i waiting for

Putrid Ghost, The Useless Host

walked back at the right moment 
we said good night then said good morning
stretch tired muscles in the inner sanctum
bless the meal before we eat we need some tea
smoke weed in secret meetings
remember the first thing u said to me
u said that youll press delete
that light is the only thing guiding us
besides the sound of the foot prints in front 

and i dont mind that you gave me a fake number to reach after you left 
i called and talked to those people instead

High Definition Cry Repetion

please stop talking
im obviously not the person that you thought i was
i think too often about the possibility youll murder us 

grip fate like its too late
talk to it like you got nothing to lose
charge a true rate 
livable wage 
give in to your rage
go postal post apocalyptic video game 
epoxy epoch together where the trees talk
keep the secret observe how my knees walk
bow legged and pigeon toed
i wont to make it
i already chose 
i went naked forgo my clothes  
you cant hide!
so come on in and get baptized
youre not a bad guy
you had a chance to act right
i admit it was kind of a whack try
things tend to blend in grey when you observe in black and white
but at the end of the day as long as youre saved you can go back to life
its too late too for me too many mistakes
im going to a place that i dont even believe in 
four season red ember bleating delay tape
lets stay safe no decay today 
oh no stay away 
im amazed you made it this far 
but do you remember which way you came  ?

im really sad

PLZ STOP TALKIN

lay low now
after the circle breaks 
wrong time wrong place
i thought it was a parable 
so i launched it into space 
icky slump, thats bad
i made it off the back board 
i made rock, i made jazz 
i never told you the reason we couldnt go there
i walked through yesterday 
i turned my nose up
thats my story 
people die here everyday 
im not a god i just want my coffee  
explosive devices
why does it come around when only i can see it?
im high off the fumes from this fire
after this ill be reminded of how i once felt
watched it wash over myself 
felt good so clean 
absolutely a good thing
so id like to feel better right now
feeel it float right up my throat

PUNK SHOW AT THE LIMINAL SPACE

i dont wanna be myself 
i wanna be someone else 
right now, i know 

i changed my mind, ill go to hell
just feed me and keep me in a cell
spend everyday needing so much fucking help
ill tell you the secret and see if you tell 

im not afraid of falling anymore 
i stare at the face 
i ignore features that look the same
theres a hook in my face
pull it out another one forms behind it
instantly cut off circulation
i feel my eyelids flutter as i struggle to sit
i just collapse to my knees in a fit
coughing, laughing, dry heave
punch my fist against the seat and the lid 

theres a message in here somewhere !
changing lanes
ill stay in mine
you stay insane
i love this crowd
dog bites man 
man drops a hydrogen bomb on the ground 
i got a sweet tooth 
i like it when i find hidden objects
i see you
underneath the grass
rubbing against me 
touch it, whats the difference?
ask me if its empty
over turn the glass and get every single last drop out 

oh god its fit right in the palm of my hand now 
rejected blessing i see the angel it shines down
im happy to have the plaque scrapped from my teeth
i added gems to my canines
im playing with them as we speak 

i lie and i steal things
try to be revealing 
off putting !!!
show me where i lost footing
lip service
cock sucking dick circus 
ill be at auction but all of this shits worthless

couldnt begin to imagine how that happened
hey, look over there! 
spit in a napkin!
are you kidding? im asking
are you shitting in my hand or wishing on black magic?
you didnt understand
sometimes its okay to match the energy of your worst man
im the dead spy, i got two red eyes
ill let you guess why i stare out my blinds paranoid
people around me notice and im afraid that theyre annoyed
or think im crazy, and maybe theyre right
backdrop: illusion of contact
age it until it tastes like a safe ride
take you home in the back of a sports car
godly intention so pure as im sure that yours are

i dont wanna be myself
i wanna be someone else

Numbing Agent

slimy oozing bubbling stuff erupting

touching all my clean white t shirts

dont ask me where ive been or ill have to lie

floating

in reference to my weekend

asleep behind the wheel 

havent eaten

feels good

try to keep it real

my body armor is so camoflaughed, bitch!

its got invisible rocket launchers right on it

holding on to way too much

watching my hair grow 

fucked up    

broken bones 

i notice those hurt the most when you wake up and remember how they happened



time for altered vision 

betrayed

i know you feel that way 

while im indifferent

betrayed 



who do i need to hurt?

to make shame a motivator that will work 

and after that sustain an outlook 

without constantly reminding me of how long it took

i know it wont be like before



i never believed that 

i know we both see that i need to do more 

i said i agree that 

this shit wont stop driving a wedge in the floor     



exceptions 

satisfaction is guaranteed

except when i dont land on my feet 

exceptions

i love them

just please love me  



and im a beast when 

my anger reaches my dome 

its just a circle

but it is all ive ever known

Bad Boy Cat Toy

Probably my favorite song on this album.
The "main loop" is from a rehearsal recording of my math-rock type band, Ultra Death Men, sped up and cut up.
The song is about a lot of things, as always, but was most heavily inspired by my first trip to San Diego. It was a pretty strange, negative, and intense part of my life, but the experiences I had there had profound effects on my outlook.
The first line of the lyrics references one night Bradlea and I were driving through the desert and the entire dusk sky was literally a full rainbow.
The reiteration of that part of the song the second time is about how I'd wake up every morning to a collection of four cats sleeping on me and they'd all scramble away from me when they realized I was awake, as if to hide the fact that they'd been sleeping on me.

Loud Noise In My Room

trouble!? // JIBRAL REUPLOAD

quickstep down the liffey pirouette until your lungs give out // JIBRAL REUPLOAD

untitled unmixed demo (STOMACHBOOK)

Seventh track on Bad Happy.

A bit of an "anthem" for those of you who have a propensity to compromise yourself and overlook unfair mistreatment by your friends and other loved ones for the sake of keeping the relationships intact... I'm quite prone to this.

Even after years of being hurt by people I know who have cheated on me, belittled my accomplishments and talent, ditched me, ignored my calls and emails, forgot to do important things they said they would for, broken promises, violated my trust, and whatever else, for the sake of nothing but themselves, I've still generally stayed un-confrontational about betrayal, essentially making it okay to betray me.
I wanted to approach this topic in a constructive manner, as often I do, but not be too subtle about the message.

If you're in a position where you are compromising your own happiness to keep your life less dramatic and your friends groups without schism; relationships without quarrel: don't keep doing it. Try to find common ground.
If they remain obstinate, they aren't worth your time.

/Life lesson

Betrayal is okay.

Blacklist

Red Sign

imdeath4

Track 4 from Perfect Life & Other Stuff, available on June 17th!
This album is a collaboration with my 17 year old self.
Pre-order digital or check lyrics here
http://bubblegumoctopus.bandcamp.com/album/perfect-life-other-stuff

The Group

PASSENGER OF SHIT - SLICING UP YA PRICK

Bag Of Bombs

ACROBAT OVER A VAT OF ACID CRAP

Blood Soup

I Only Smile When I'm Laughing

this is a song that was written in 2016 over a beat made in 2019 revisited in 2021.

lyrics:
my instinct tells me i smell like fresh meat
and i better be ready to defend myself if i need to
although ive never been in a fight
im weak and youre right
im sorry i didnt believe you
and ill apologize a second time
when i see you
because im sure it will lead to
the unbearable feeling that we are both only the same
and both totally insane
i feel it next to me etching itself into my skin
so i can start to act like a small part of myself again
youll see it too and know that its a preview
as we stand totally frozen and try to regroup
and after everything melts away into something else
well find another person and offer them all our help 
stepped with the wrong foot first
now it hurts to walk
ill walk it off stop talking shit 


i drank the blood but im still human
still want to do drugs 
i drank the blood but im pretty sure that i didnt drink enough

its shallow here
vapid
all my strength was sapped when i strapped in
i got tired so i napped
and when i woke up i found all the feeling was back
yeah at least it was until i needed it
squeeze every last bit of lust out of my bleeding tip
isnt it funny how quick they switch it in their minds 
when collective conscious isnt enough to get by
i know i know i know
humans cant fly
thats why they clipped the wings off every damn time
i didnt mean to abstract myself
im the sum of my goals subtracted by my shelf life
i helped drive the price up
so i must die!
i struck out blindly and touched my own rough side

i didnt mean to get frustrated
but sometimes i just fuck up and i fuckin hate it

Fresh Meat

Hello! I’m just an autistic kid on the internet who likes to make music sometimes! (I also go by He/Him or It/It’s pronouns. Call me Deer, Billy, Corbin or Irvin/Irving.
Some of my posts here are reposts of songs from really old obscure games, like dream emulator, which are mainly put on for archival purposes ^_^

Four BFB playlist

Adeerwithnotlogic_Studio’s