prod and masterer -> @assperrr

see you lie, but you take it back
give me one more try and I'll take you back
and you ain't seen my side but you say it's wack
and you've been living two lives seen it in the past
you can cry, but I wont stay for that
you gon tell me that you care but you faking that
you were never really there why you saying that
say you're clearing up the air whatchu playing at
say its one more time
that was one more lie
she said one more try
and it's the last goodbye

1morelie (akira3k, asperr)

stuck at the table (christmas dinner) p. crona

produced by zoltar

lyrics:

the waiting game's begun 
so i can't talk a lot
she's got it figured out
while i'm left in the dark
there's no escaping me
i'm bound to my own fears
'cause this is who i am 
i've been like this for years

do you think that i'll change?
'cause i'm so scared i won't
i know it's up to me
but i can't be on my own
affliction takes ahold
and punctures through my face
i wanna hide my soul
but i can't erase mistakes

dysregulation in the dome 
disadvantaged and alone 
nobody ever checks on me
'cause they know i'm out of hope
why do i take up this space? 
i'm not worthy, i'm afraid
how can i make it more clear that
i'm never really okay?

right from the start, i was a mess 
there was no saving me 
i took it all straight to the heart 
now i've got jealousy
the greenest eyes you've ever seen
staring carefully
i'm sorry that i'm not that strong 
my heart forsakens thee

uncertainty has guaranteed my futility
i'm like a tree stuck in the dark 
suffering and steep 
and while i'm stuck behind a screen 
there's no agency
i've come to realize i'm not free 
there is no release

i came on too strong 
but how is that wrong?
i can't help it if i have a heart
that's full of love
fuck what they all say 
i'm borderline insane
i wouldn't get close to me
if i were you, i'd run away

i'm a liability
i burden those close to me 
don't you ever feel like you're the
only one who's lost at sea?
reading all your messages 
feel the sting inside my chest 
pace around my room until i
write off every word you said

even if i was found dead
i'd hope that you won't regret 
everything you never said
i don't want that in your head

at the end of the day 
i still care about you
regardless of our statuses
i know you'll find truth
the boundaries we put in place
will keep us en route 
we all change, but honestly 
we can't forget our roots

-----

anima

with https://soundcloud.com/arr_eeh and https://soundcloud.com/kanashisadface

I’m passed out, I’m broken on all these dreams
Tell me you’re hoping I’ll break the seams
I can't hear a word you say, over these screams
It’s what I get
It’s what I get, it’s what I get

Feel the rot on the inside
Passing out on a train ride
Fill my veins up with fluoride
Tell you, “I ain’t got shit to hide”

Just to get you to want me
I'd commit every sin
the thought of heaven will haunt me
They’ll never let me in
I’ll paint my nails if you ask me to
Just tell me what shade
I’ll pierce my nose in the hopes you like to see me in pain

I’m passed out, I’m broken on all these dreams
Tell me you’re hoping I’ll break the seams
I’m choking, and hoping I find a way to breathe
It’s what I get, it’s what I get

Feel the rot on the inside
Passing out on a train ride
Fill my veins up with fluoride
Tell you, “I ain’t got shit to hide”

Feel the rot on the inside
Passing out on a train ride
Fill my veins up with fluoride
Tell you, “I ain’t got shit to hide”

I don't have shit to hide from you
but it seems like you could learn a lesson
In telling the truth
And I've been losing my mind
Tryin' to figure out why
You always leave me hangin' out to dry
You always leave me hangin' out to dry
Fill my veins with fluoride

fluoride w/ re: + kanashi (king theta)

featuring @b_murph
produced by michael harrison, ayoley, & autrioly

Preaching away
When you’re eastbound it’s rare to see snow and gray ends of the road
Hang up the feeling I’ve grown
And let it seep through the ghost

If I could reach you, I would send as many signs to take control
It’s not convenient, what I’m seeking is like nothing to your
Soul

My body’s peeling away, can’t call it day
Becoming stuck as a shadow of my old self
Locked in this window pane

You can’t
Describe
My body
No lines
Act out
No eyes
You might as well call me a prototype
Hanging down from your ceiling, you’re losing life
Artificial, I’m bugging to open eyes
Make it make sense, I’m dealing a poltergeist

You couldn’t shake me out if you wanted
Because I’m out of a home
All I’m seeing is chrome
But when it’s time to cave it in, my legs go slow
-
(@b_murph)
Cannot look the other way, 'cause then I'm staring at my ghost
Why are we all the way out here, I thought you knew which way to go
And if I look you in the eyes does that mean that I am a part of you?
I see my poltergeist, it's standing right beside you

So let's runaway
I know another place
Where we can hide, and watch the stars, and list all our mistakes
So why don't you just stay
I know I'm bout to go
My time is up and all I want is you to hold me close

And say how you love me, even if it ain't true
'Cause as the light leaves my eyes all I wanna see is you
And now I feel my body getting colder
As a ghost I'll watch over your shoulder
-
You couldn’t shake me out if you wanted
Because I’m out of a home
All I’m seeing is chrome
But when it’s time to cave it in, my legs go slow

Carve out a pitch to all the others getting out of hand
Cold sweats on the beach, my comforts in the sand
Place a bet over me, and argue till our ends meet
Ends meet

I can't deny
That I didn't say goodbye

spotify

prototype (ft. b murph)

coward w/ kingdom (micheal harrison)

produced/mixed/mastered by zoltar

lyrics:

well i feel fake
don't know what i want
'cause everyday feels all the same
i'm right where you want me
complacent, but lonely
i'm ashamed

i'll go for days without talking at all
confined to my room while i stare at the wall
trying to muster the courage to talk
but i'm too afraid so i'm writing it all
you think i'm annoying
well i think you're right
i feel like i know you from another life
i cannot fathom what i feel inside
forget about me, i'm just another guy

but try waking up with a chest full of nothing
my body's been begging for something of substance
this chip on my shoulder is just getting older
and i swear to god that if i had the chance
i would take back the seconds i already wasted
all of the pain that i haven't faced yet
the taste of defeat, the taste of the pavement
gotta retreat, but no one will save him

replacing my own thoughts with love, but my hope's lost
i feel like i'm reaching for something that's long gone
i'm stuck on this chapter
she's reading with laughter
embarrassed, but i'll sanctify
my struggles in little time
breaking my back trying to fix you up
i'm so sorry that i wasn't enough
the cards you were dealt
broke the heart that you held
there's no one to blame
so i'll point at myself

well that's fine
i know i can't go through that
unwind the vines pulling you right back
sit tight, address the problems you have
aggression's making me see all black
i need a heart that can function and can be patient
too bad the strings that attach are always fraying
you think i like being anxious and always shaking?
i licked these wounds on my own
don't need your saving


-----

red 40 blues

Caught (prod. JewelryBoy)

produced by mix
thank you, everyone,
sorry its been awhile
love every last one of you <3
wish me a happy birthday :D

enjoy<33
lyrics:

Oh that's music to my ear-

I'll hold my grudge
cause you lie too much
now you're mocking me
why can't you see?

I see myself in a ditch 
filled with rocks and sand in it
will you come and pull me out of here?
I know that the end is near
It's been different since I was cured
remembering pain that I endured
been pushed in dirt so many times

how am I even alive?

I can see the light
how am I alive?
i don't wanna die
how am I alive?
I can see the light
how am I alive?
i don't wanna die
how am I alive?

I'll hold my grudge
Cause you lie too much
Now you're mocking me
why can't you see?

(how am I alive?)
(alive, alive, alive)


how am I alive?
I just wanna die
should I end my life?
should I use this knife?

thank you <3

childhood

featuring @yungblasian
prod @01kon & @drmabeats

the beaten path 1/26

lyrics:
lyrics:
Do you want love or want drugs?
Pick your poison
I take a bump just to stop all the noises
I'm just a junkie I cannot avoid it
Wish I could restart this shit is annoying
Rehab, man I missed my appointment
Re-hashing with shawty about all my choices
We laugh in this moment, next one I'm hoisted
To a place that I shouldn't be-

Here
I hear Lucifer talk in my ear
Said I'll be right back, it's been a year
Know I promised I'll be there my dear
Don't want me to come home and it's clear to me
I threw out everything I hold dear to me
And my god only thing that put fear in me
I been screaming for help no one hearing me

@yungblasian
I fell too deep that one time
Too fucked up I don't really feel alive
Too selfish, sorry that I made you cry
Too fucked up I don't know what's in my mind
SOS
I'm more than less
I want to feel something that's more than sex
I wrote a song to get it off my chest
I know you're mad cause I'm a fucking mess
Oh, I got high
Just pick your poison
I'll buy you flowers
I know I'm annoying
Let's make it clear
I know I'm not the best for you
But I still try for you

My head hurt from the drugs, I been fucked up
Blood red squirt from my lungs, I been cutting up
I don't know why they want problems, but I been ducking slugs
I just been looking for solace, I ain't find nothing much

Here
I hear Lucifer talk in my ear
Said I'll be right back, it's been a year
Know I promised I'll be there my dear
Don't want me to come home and it's clear to me
I threw out everything I hold dear to me
And my god only thing that put fear in me
I been screaming for help no one hearing me

And I guess that's cause nobody's here
Nobody-
Nobody's here
Nobody's here
Nobody-
Nobody's here

Nobody's here
Do you want love or want drugs?
Pick your poison
I take a bump just to stop all the noises
I'm just a junkie I cannot avoid it
Wish I could restart this shit is annoying
Rehab, man I missed my appointment
Re-hashing with shawty about all my choices
We laugh in this moment, next one I'm hoisted
To a place that I shouldn't be-

coward w/ kingdom (micheal harrison)

dantei

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