Featuring @sendflowrs
Produced by @splashgvng & @overthro
Engineering, additional vocals by @horoshavibes

LYRICS
You said this was for the best and I'd
Feel better once I got some rest
You lied
I thought that sobriety would bring me peace of mind
It's not

I couldn't be more wrong
Turns out I need a crutch to lean on
Without it I'm too fucked up
Despite my pride
I know I need help
Surely I'm too young to die
I'm too traumatized to think rationally
Like why do bad things always happen to me
You cut ties and turned your back to leave
I really thought that it'd be hard for you

(sendflowrs)
I'll be honest really thought that it'd be hard for you 
I even stopped my friends smoking in my car for you
I know you hate it when I'm faded
That's the shit I lean on
And I'm sippin' care plus until my blood turns neon 

Never thought that it would happen to me
You just told me I'm a fool and stabbed my back and then leave
And I don't wanna hear your voice no more just close your teeth
And I been feelin' hella wavy so just get off me 

You make it seem so easy
Turning your back on me

Listen on Spotify!

Too Young to Die w/ sendflowrs (Prod. Splashgvng & overthro)

the first single off my new album 'dearly departing', coming out 9/9!

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
album art by @/ashleydhe on instagram

so much time and effort has been put into this project and i truly hope u enjoy <3

lyrics:
i cant really see it here and now
and the lights behind my back are turning down
every sailor knows his in and outs
but i struggle every now and then with life so hear me out

i might die today
i could throw my life away
every time i surface i cant see
i think my mind’s away
they say im bad luck
thats why the bad stuck
and follows me everywhere

seeing aint always believing
the ocean was never forgiving
we need to drop anchor

and i stand and wait as cold air breaks the sail before us all
our fatal fate has taken everything that we once loved
so fuck it all
if i go down i’ll be swinging
a rope tied to songs i’ve been singing
the weight is enough for a fixing
so i tighten the knot and im ready for war
war
i still need more (from life, inside my mind)
more

i cant really see it here and now
so i contemplate the ways in which i drown
every time i’m lost im never found
i just suffer all the consequences, end up on the ground

i might die today
i could throw my life away
every time i surface i cant see
i think my mind’s away
they say im bad luck
thats why the bad stuck
and follows me everywhere 

seeing aint always believing
the ocean was never forgiving
we need to drop anchor

im leading a life not worth living
and seemingly so, unforgiving
its time i let out this anger

dearly departing

anchor [jolst]

spotify & apple music!

V. anchor [jolst]

the second single off my upcoming album 'dearly departing' coming out on 9/9
featuring @betweentheveinsandi
produced by @jolst
art by @/ashleydhe on instagram
hope u enjoy <3

lyrics:
its finite, reactive bullshit
that got us here
and i dont mean to laugh or joke
but i see it clearly how
time takes lives in the cruelest way
and im fucking exhausted
so i wont pray for calmer waves
im better off in a coffin 

or when its half mast
think about what i’ve passed
will i be forgiven?

or when im undone
will i run
or is this a new beginning?

i think i saw your star sign
projected in the night sky
i look out to the ocean
and then im back to your eyes

veins:
I don't give a fuck anymore
I would let her drown me in a low tide
these decisions assault my eyes
I brace for the waves that drag me back into the deep tide

yuh,
it gives a deep high
I guess it feel right
underwater with no sunshine
I heave a deep sigh
I'm filled with sea brine
all of my bones will rest in deep lime

but it's been nice
I hope u feel right
I hope he never leaves ur fucking side
I pray u both live long and happy lives
most of all, importantly, I hope u feel alive

its finite, reactive bullshit
that got us here
and i dont mean to laugh or joke
but i see it clearly how
time takes lives in the cruelest way
and im fucking exhausted
so i wont pray for calmer waves
im better off in a coffin

low tide (ft. betweentheveinsandi) [jolst]

IV. low tide (ft. betweentheveinsandi) [jolst]

i can make something out of everything i see...
prod. @jolst & @sainttomorrow
art by @/ashleydhe on instagram
love u all, album next week
from the bottom of my heart, i hope u enjoy <3

lyrics:
i need help
could u lend me a hand?
cuz the foam on the waves
just threw me into the sand

i need time more than anything
i can make something out of everything i see
but i just want to breathe for once
i don’t think thats asking much

to take, to give, to love
living is hard enough
im so used to the brace before the impact
that when i sleep i just wake before the contact

and now i wander
and i wonder
if its over, dead and gone
if my memory takes too long
are u someone i can rely on?

i need time more than anything
i can make something out of everything i see
but i just want to breathe for once
i don’t think thats asking much

i think i waited too long 
i know the damage is done
im moving mountains just to solve
all of the problems i’ve caused
i’d rather take it all in
than try to fix what i broke
cuz every time i step a foot in
i just slip and then choke
i think im losing whats in front of me
and whats in front of me
is the ocean and some company
but what is company
when im all alone
i’ll try to cope 
but i dont wanna know
what’s really gone now

the weight is heavy on me
and i’ve been falling backwards
i cant stay steady i just
pray for better days when i think i need you
more than i’d admit
i wanna cry and fucking quit
my stomach pulls and shakes and twists
take me back to those i miss

i need time more than anything
i can make something out of everything i see
but i just want to breathe for once
i don’t think thats asking much

VII. mountain mover [jolst x saint tomorrow]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

in the wasteland we carry on
sold a story for way too long
may our curses and blessings bond
for its over before its gone
at a time
its one
at a time
by design
we fail
by design

im losing my mind
im losing my mind

tell me what its worth to u
the lives and bridges burned
the courage of the hurt
the hate your children learn
would you rescue me?
would you send me a signal?
or rest my pleas
like the hearse of a victim?

i understand u had it ur way far too long
well the truth is i never open to anyone
and the reason i dont talk is not my fault
my brain is busy with self sabotage

im screaming the words for you
im bleeding so cut me loose
my ceiling is worn
the patterns are torn
my patience is wearing thin
u couldn’t be sure
i can’t give u more
is this what its like to end?

tell me what its worth to u
the lives and bridges burned
the courage of the hurt
the hate your children learn
would you rescue me?
would you send me a signal?
or rest my pleas
like the hearse of a victim?

stream everywhere!

XI. rescue [jolst x decks]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
i press pause & rewind
it all feels like a movie
maybe thats how i kill time
i swear its amusing
i make a victim of myself
& im crying to no one
its a cycle of nature,
and i live in darkness,
no moon & no sun 

i hope this reads like a letter
whenever you hear it
nothing would make me feel better
than knowing u feel it too
this island it paints me blue
sincerely, it’s cause of u
the way the leaves they hold me
it almost feels like u got to know me 

[evan]
wave after wave 
and i’ve been drowning in a sea of my own thoughts
a clear image of everything i’m not 
hold on and hope it’s not a lot

i know this too well 
here reading the same old story 
i’m stuck in this cycle 
all i can do is wonder if 

are you coming to save me 
i’m empty 
pull me out of the shit that’s preventing me
is it too late to get out of this 
draw my name in the sand are you coming to save me 

are you coming to save me 
am i coming to save me
i put it all line 
draw my name in the sand 
are you coming to save me

VIII. sincerely (ft. evan carr) [jolst x pekarot]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
if this is real i’ve learned my lesson
i’d bring a chair to watch myself trying to breathe
when every day is just progression
its easy just to stop and stare at what u need
and every time i turn around
my vision’s upside down
and the mirror’s staring back at me
now i’m waiting for a sound
cuz my ears are bleeding out
isnt it nice to be so happy?

all the time spent makes me sick
i’ve been down, wheres a stroke of good fortune
while my life has been at risk
where were you, did you even come searching?
while the nightmares subsided 
my bones and my heart are on terms with the devil
clear i have been misguided
the water just dragged me right back where i came from

paint it on black
put out a message
i dont think that ima regret this
on top of the world for a second
then i slip and im back at the entrance
look at the way that i fuck up
must have been somethin within me
had to be something im hiding
look at the facts we’re presenting
like, he doesnt talk
he doesnt socialize what is his problem
clearly its all in head though
what if its something thats mental
i cant breathe when its all building i need time and cover
out of air i think im drowning, am i going under?

all the time spent makes me sick
i’ve been down, wheres a stroke of good fortune
while my life has been at risk
where were you, did you even come searching?
while the nightmares subsided 
my bones and my heart are on terms with the devil
clear i have been misguided
the water just dragged me right back where i came from

VI. pay your respects [jolst x irby]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
i shouldn’t have woken up
(i lost souls of people i trusted most)
we couldn’t have fucked this up
(the waves told of more than i’ll ever know)

the sail strikes back
and the mast’s in half
now the ships all cracked
never coming back

lower deck, where i slept, shouldve seen it comin
i was blessed with a soul now im left with nothing
cuz i couldn’t find a way out
the floor burst as i was screaming for help

and now i live with my failure
im burdened with loss
was i meant to be saved or
is this just what i’ve earned
cuz god knows i never learn

so teach me
if this is my lesson then come fucking teach me
im suffering out here alone where nobody can reach me

i shouldn’t have woken up
(i lost souls of people i trusted most)
we couldn’t have fucked this up
(the waves told of more than i’ll ever know)

the sail strikes back
and the mast’s in half
now the ships all cracked
never coming back
when the sail strikes back
we relive our past
feel our burdens cast
never coming back

III. the sail strikes back [jolst x taylor morgan]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
it feels like im drowning
i wake up im bruised and battered
i finally stop spinning
and the ocean goes on forever and ever

what we have isn’t perfect, but fuck it we’re trying
i struggle with certainty, and the truth is im lying
my heart is a mess inside
but i know im fine enough

im seasick
took my heart, i didnt know that i needed it
fall apart, the very second we’re leavin and then
i wasn’t smart, couldn’t even bear to see the ship go
underrrr
the very second we had
sundereddd

and thats the last time i fall apart to save myself 
our story passed time, written like a book up on the shelf
and i swear im always
fucking up
nowhere to run

everything is 
uncomfortable
its never fun

and i wonder why
im staying up
to see the sun

maybe i should just go to bed

[cherry]
i’m stuck underwater 
and i just cannot find the space to breathe 
its hotter and hotter 
i sweat through my collar when ur with me 
took it all in i just sat back 
i don’t wanna fall don’t wanna backtrack u saw my heart and u cracked that
i saw ur heart and its matte black 
i saw ur heart 
u know its not perfect 
but fuck it were trying 
so lets get something working

II. seasick (ft. cherryrizla) [jolst x lavendertxwn]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
she had her life in a picture frame
had her future signed away
he had managed to escape a mess
a year with none to blame

take me away from my innocence
i could only dream that we were kids again
once i had fallen i had never left
it was u that once had told me what the sigil meant
now the journey begins
hundreds of souls never to speak again
i could be different but pride is a sin
u couldn’t manage urself let alone a
trip to burden many like yourself
disregard to hundreds and their health
all in search of feelings never felt
you were so selfish u didn’t deserve it

and now the memories come flooding back to me
like a ship at sea we capsized, never recovered the bodies
we went down burning (in a ball of fire)
draw back the curtains (in her funeral attire)

and i can’t wait to find you out
as life goes by i feel my time run out
hey i wouldnt be surprised if you hate me
i been struggling alone on the daily
i know im a lot to handle baby
tell me if you need to breathe, i’ll be waiting

I. eulogy for a funeral [jolst x irby]

old one i got around to finishing
rly love this one hope u do too
yr support forever means the world
new drops been goin up on the main go check those if u want
goodnight decks nation

lyrics:
say
grace
underneath ur breath
i still wonder if muttering that would be worth
the
taste
of whats holding u back
while im tethered to weights at the bottom of all these 
waves
they come crashing down
i just hope to god im making u proud
i guess that i just win some & lose some
never meant to abuse what we got but i

feel my life pass me by
something’s off, you’re not by my side
guess the roses i got were consolation
saw the hand i held in constellation
knew u best as earth precipitated
all my problems now are predating
the present, i wanna feel
like its never for the best, what i want is real
i’ve saved what is left, all behind my shield
i’ve made that left, now im right to deal alone

say grace [metlast x 5head]

with the life i’m given, i’m healing.

@lovelessgroup
@butaneband

III. the sail strikes back [jolst x taylor morgan]

decks

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