soooo this actually dropped like a week ago everywhere else and i space uploading it here LMFAO so enjoy<3

prod me

lyrics:

take my hand
i'll only catch you if you let me
holding on to hope as we both drown
in rivers of doubt as we grow worlds apart
hold tight to my arm
as i try to mend this
hold me back
from a choice that i might regret
keep another secret we both better
stop and restart
get a grip on our hearts
look up to the stars
when our world is ending

there must be something in the water
that seeks to push us ever farther
and i can only stay so damn strong
you look at me like i'm a monster
there must be something in the air, love
that has me acting fucking careless
and you can only stick around so long
you wipe a tear and put your hair up

help me open up to you
i swear it never feels right
sick of staying over
wanna see you in the sunlight
help me see the part of you
you love to push away and hide
i just wanna be the only place that you reside
gave it all i had and some
have you had enough yet, or have we finally run our course?
breathing in through ravaged lungs
she's a contaminant 
i swear that we've been through this all before...

There must be Something In The Water
That seeks to push us ever farther
And I can only stay so damn strong
You look at me like I'm a monster
There must be Something In The Air, Love
That has me acting fucking careless
And you can only stick around so long
You wipe a tear and put your hair up

Something In The Water

i forget who made the beat :(

Lyrics:

yea i'm sleeping on the wheel on a thousand mile drive
where the fuck are all the cars at 
i see no sign of life
and i think i'm seeing ghosts so i'm sure i'm gonna die
and i don't even have a place i'm ending up at in mind

she keeps telling me shit like a week ago i'd buy
now i don't think that i'd believe you if i saw it with my eyes
yea she's going to parties
while i sit here writing lines
it's like a shitty fuckin movie
where she's fucking other guys

but "please don't fuckin cry"
god i can't fucking take it
your heart ain't even mine
baby there's no fucking space 
so how can you still say it's vacant
that shit was just a lie
walking on some eggshells so i don't hit a mine

eggshells

shoutout to @kennyorlando for helping me finish this <3


[safeatlast:]
so cold
waiting for sum1 to hold
me as i try to get warm
get me away from the snow
at least thats how i used to feel

take me back to winters in toronto
take me back to drowning every minute in the bottle
take me to when i could be proud of myself oh
take me back to feeling sumthin other than the sorrow

AND I MIGHT FALL APART BENEATH THE TREES
THAT OVERLOOK THE SPOT WE USED TO MEET
I PROMISE THAT UR EVERYTHING I NEED
SHOULDA NEVER WORE MY HEART UPON MY SLEEVE

[Kenny Orlando:]
i wish it was easier than following my heart
cause its given me nothing but nightmares and problems
one minute im drowning 
the next second im all in
im sinking 
im falling 
right down to
the bottom
take me back to the time 
where we were doing fine 
both of us 
where the love was 
can you take me back to the city
where everything felt so pretty 
AND I HATE THAT EVERYTHING’S BROKEN
WISH I COULD TAKE BACK 
AND MAKE IT ALL PERFECT 
THE DAYS PASS
ITS KILLING ME 
FILLING ME 
WITH THIS COLD AND DARK HOLLOWNESS

[safeatlast:]
AND I MIGHT FALL APART BENEATH THE TREES
THAT OVERLOOK THE SPOT WE USED TO MEET
I PROMISE THAT UR EVERYTHING I NEED
SHOULDA NEVER WORE MY HEART UPON MY SLEEVE

fall apart

fall apart w/ Kenny Orlando (king theta)

Lyrics:

im just a sad demon
trying my best to find reason 
plagued by a blight so they all leave me
so what right do i have to believe
that things will get better when i sit alone
here in the snow unbothered by the cold
why am i so hopeless i do not know
how to cope when im out here all alone

hair snow white
my eye glows red
warmth is gone
heart is frozen
drink coffee
to help cope with
my soul that is so broken

i see myself staring back at me inside a broken mirror
distorted image yet i somehow can still see so clear

i realize i am awful 
a road with a big pothole
a story with a plot hole
a rightfully earned title

sleeping beauty's scared of me
im a horrid site to see
i scared her right back to sleep
ghouls are far from lovely

im just a sad demon
trying my best to find reason 
plagued by a blight so they all leave me
so what right do i have to believe
that things will get better when i sit alone
here in the snow unbothered by the cold
why am i so hopeless i do not know
how to cope when im out here all alone

Just A Ghoul (prod. acey)

a few years ago, I lost somebody close to me and I still don't believe that I have taken time to really process it as a fact that they are gone but I made this song to help with the process, as well as help others who may be dealing with or have dealt with loss of a loved one. I hope this song helps you in some way...

Lyrics

yeah it rains and it snows
so cold i cant feel my toes
yeah life comes and goes
but im losing all my bros
its 6 in the morn
and im way too fucking stoned
and its led to brittle bones
fatal wounds that i cant close
 
the alcohol replaced the blood
deleted all the memories
told me that you'd stop
"this will not be the death of me"
we were playing make belief 
cause i believed
everything
you made a pinky promise
but forgot about the honesty

what happened?
why were you laughing?
you drank your life away
you had a son that you left panicked
screaming "wheres my dad at?"
i couldnt bare to tell him the truth
how could i when i didnt want to

cats have 9 lives
you lost them all
I'd give you mine
you rise
i fall
when you left so did the color
you weren't like any other
 
if dogs go to heaven 
what about the cats?
is there another side 
did you take another path 

yeah it rains and it snows
so cold i cant feel my toes
yeah life comes and goes
but im losing all my bros
its 6 in the morn
and im way too fucking stoned
and its led to brittle bones
fatal wounds that i cant close

lil cat (ushanka boy)

(GhostBxy)
killed who i was 
all in the name of love
hate what ive become
so that i could have some
drugs
to fuck me up
feel smoke in my lungs
this isn’t who I want to be
this isn’t who I want to be
  
ive been on my own for a minute now
i really need to scream but i cant be loud
taking deep breaths to help calm down
but i wasted each breath trynna figure out
how to get out of this house i built
on top of a grave of someone that i killed

miss who i was
replaced by a face that i hate
why is it the same
wished for some light 
but then i got me some darker days

im beyond saving
my life only equated
to a broken shattered down old battered heart
the one thing i had was torn apart

rip me to pieces like letters in shredders remember november
when you tore me down

killed who i was 
all in the name of love
hate what ive become
so that i could have some
drugs
to fuck me up
feel smoke in my lungs
this isn’t who I want to be
this isn’t who I want to be

(Yungcray)
(I’m sorry bro but I don’t know your lyrics yet)


(GhostBxy)
killed who i was 
all in the name of love
hate what ive become
so that i could have some
drugs
to fuck me up
feel smoke in my lungs
this isn’t who I want to be
this isn’t who I want to be

And That’s All Folks… (w/ yungcray) (prod. Sorrow Bringer)

(lyrics)

yeah I'm leaving 
for good but this time I'll let you know
why did you have to come back into my life?
I was doing really good
then you sent that text that night
can we give it another try? 
can we give it another try?

my heart is just eroding
blood in veins are frozen
nutrients amounts to none inside my chest are rodents
i used to be a person
but then i met you 
what you dont know about love is that it takes two

takes you to give me back
effort that you lacked
i was doing wonderful then you threw me on tracks
leaving me for dead
our story must end
cause if it carries on then we'll create wounds you cant mend

we both sleep alone
its better this way
wish that we did go 
and meet another day

im staring at your photo
I knew you'd never change
so I'm asking you like the rain to please go away

November (lostcage)

(ghostbxy)
I already know that were not gonna make it
You’ve been fucking around with them so shameless
You’re the reason why our love is tainted 
Do you think me dumb?
Do you think me brainless?

I’m always trying my best
But you’re lying 
Stabbing knives in my chest 
So I’ll go 

You're not different
You're just like them
Veins were filled with toxin
That's how you lured me in

You might be poison ivy with the way you go invite me into your Toxic life and its fucking constant fighting

Cause you don't want to admit the truth
Burning all that smells proof 
Ashes stay like scent infused
Clothing that I bought for you

Giving my all but you don't give a fuck
Breaking my bones while you're breaking my heart
Telling me that this is all my fault

(halfhearted)
You don't know what you do to me
I don't think you ever will
Remember that night
You said I won't drive
I've been behind the wheel
Crossing the lines that I said I won't cross
???
???
You walked out the door
Why it take you so long

And I'm stuck in my head with no mission
Remember in school I would get you detention
Used to fall asleep, now I'm up all night
I can't dream
This is for the kid that I was
Headphones on in the back of the bus
Can't feel shit cause a knife in my gut
Let me live girl, I've had enough

(ghostbxy)
I’m always trying my best
But you’re lying 
Stabbing knives in my chest 
So I’ll go