when my dreamscape and my reality starts blurring what is really real anymore?

consider this ghoul in tokyo pt 2

i put a lot of work into this project and i hope you enjoy
also shoutout the amazing producer sorrow bringer
extra sound design and effects by me

this is my art and what i wanna make

- mars

ps this was heavily influenced by sewer

hellscape

Produced by fantom

Lyrics

Baby I'm so awful but you should know I care
I don't know where I oughta but I wanna disappear
I'm losing all my hope, I wanna fucking go
I wanna fucking smoke, God I feel so fucking low

If there's really a heaven right now I won't get in
I think I need a medic my chest is caving in
What's the point of living right? I won't make it out alive
I know one day it'll come but right now is not the time

I can't slow down now
It'd be wrong to hold back now
I'm not at that goal right now
But I see the fucking signs on the road right now

Got enough fuel, hit the fucking throttle
I know what to do when I'm at the bottom
Take a fucking bull mix it with bottle
Put me in type of mood I know will get me out of

That mindset where I cannot deal with my stress
In my head, I don't wanna see that text
"I think it's best if we just end this"
All I think about is death, I wanna fucking end it

But I can't and I won't
Say I do but I don't
What to do now? I don't know
I been feeling too down I might let it go

Baby I'm so awful but you should know I care
I don't know where I oughta but I wanna disappear
I'm losing all my hope, I wanna fucking go
I wanna fucking smoke, God I feel so fucking low

passion, obsession.

BottomDollAR (prod. legos)

hellscape (intro)

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
its cold, i cant feel my hands
killing another man
that wasnt apart of the plan
but fuck here i am
washing the blood of my hands
i took the last thing that made me human
now im fading back into being a demon
babygirl gimmie a reason to stay
if not ima jus drift away
ion even wanna be awake

oh my god 
smoking all night long
i wont ever stop
its the only thing im good at
the only thing i want

atleast fight back x 5

fffightback (interlude)

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
its been 45 days since i got fucked up
its been 59 days since i got drunk
doing this for my health and i hate it
jus like jelly said sobriety sucks
i like the feeling of being fucked up
it helps with know ill never be enough

i wake up and wish i could jus go back to sleep
even when i record 50 songs a week
i still feel like im just a sheep
everyone says its not that deep

beingsoberfkingsucks

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
4am on this porch i sit here and smoke
until everything i love turn to ash
off this ket but it doesnt nothing but numb my past pain
take my soul and heart and toss it out into the rain
watch me bleed, babe im on my knees
sending you messsage after message knowing you wont read
listen to my pleads, listen to me

i cant look anyone in the face
im ashamed of who i am
i'm not the man i wanna be
and i dont wanna force you to love me
but without you in my life it feels empty
and every single thing feels tempting
i jus wanna be existing

the truth is hard to swallow
been awhile since i was down this low
ive never felt this hollow
i'm trying to get fucked up so i'm trying to hit it from my bong
i used to have potential but everyone tells me im lost
i don't know what todo or where i belong
fear the worst because you know im cursed
and fuck this shit ill say it again it fucking hurts
cancel all my plans
drop everything just so i could get fucked up and play games
everything i do to numb the pain
it wont help me escape
it makes everything fade away
take everything take my soul
just let me waste away
these new meds are supposed to work
but fuck

i cant look anyone in the face
im ashamed of who i am
i'm not the man i wanna be
and i dont wanna force you to love me
but without you in my life it feels empty
and every single thing feels tempting
i jus wanna be existing

hollow

Jaswed x deekay - HARAJUKU HANGOVER (prod. cyfal)

single #1 off hellscape releasing 7/10

sewer used this beat and I never ended up making a song but found it on my pc so i made this today enjoy

produced by sorrowbringer 

album w/ hollowprpl on the 25th

& 

album w/ sorrow next month

lyrics;
ion wanna talk to this bitch im trying to roll this blunt
im not tryna talk wit this powerup in my cup
u say u hate me when im fucked up
but bitch this is who i am
im a different person everyone hates when im not on the drugs
if i fall asleep dont wake me up
plug hit my phone trying to dose me up
but im already fucked up

if i roll this blunt i dont think i can get anymore high
but i do it because if i dont ill lose my fucking mind
missed a text from my grandma i lost track of time
rather not talk about how i feel, im fine

u blocked me n u know damn well that i dont care
keep telling me im not being fair
than why the fuck are u still here
i'm not going outside im way to  fucked up  
im not going anywhere i dont give a fuck 
bitch are you dumb
its so cold out
my hands are going numb
ur so so selfish
bitch u never meant this
i was all up in her mouth like a denist

my hearts broken 
so i crush another pill
and do another line even tho you know it kills
keep going just to feel alive
keep your feelings inside
your not gonna die

roll this blunt

rotten out the soul
i’m a ghost, i’m a shell
and if i take another hit i won’t feel like myself
gothic shawty want me bloody collar casting spells
she throw away the keys in my dreams to my cell
now i’m screaming fuck love i can’t love myself
i’m looking for the problem to balance out my health
i’m tryna make a heart stop i feel like im L
im riding with a sawed off cobain on my belt

i just got a call said they want me in LA
but i don’t give a fuck imma make it anyway
them checks hit my bank
smoke it all away
they told me i was nothing but i’m really not fazed
cus we all gonna die in this fucked up world
money, love, drugs, and a lot of freaky girls
hollow tip slug don’t get blood on your pearls
i mix it with the medicine to make another mural

rotten out the soul
i’m a ghost, i’m a shell
and if i take another hit i won’t feel like myself
gothic shawty want me bloody collar casting spells
she throw away the keys in my dreams to my cell
now i’m screaming fuck love i can’t love myself
i’m looking for the problem to balance out my health
i’m tryna make a heart stop i feel like im L
im riding with a sawed off cobain on my belt

rotten soul (prod. xenshel)

let me know if this is even any good, i genuinely find it really hard to find joy in my music anymore

produced by aki

lay me down take away the pain please save me
i dont wanna die i just wish that you could save
drugged up i dont need new pills they drive me crazy
doctor said im slippin but im sippin cuz im wasted

lucks up 
see that weed smoke
in the air, i dont care
i just spit my shit in my room
underwear 
on the floor
cuz we just fucked
i still smell your hair 
in my lair
beanie dropped a song and now hes gone to where
gone to hell
yeah im a wizard bitch im runnin out of mana cuz im castin all these spells 
i might fuck around and drop a song and disappear to hell
i might smoke a blunt
fuck a bitch
then i might kill myself

i got molly all on my dinner plate
pull the trigger, i been afraid
pull the mask off, show the face 
take the pill cuz i been insane
put me down cuz i been up and i been down now im stuck awake 
so just pull the trigger just

lay me down take away the pain please save me
i dont wanna die i just wish that you could save
drugged up i dont need new pills they drive me crazy
doctor said im slippin but im sippin cuz im wasted
lay me down take away the pain please save me
i dont wanna die i just wish that you could save
drugged up i dont need new pills they drive me crazy
doctor said im slippin but im sippin cuz im wasted

tone deaf (aki)

single #2 off hellscape releasing 7/10

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;

i know what happens
i know the aftermath
but im getting tired of fighting it
just let my body lay lifeless

im getting tired of fighting it
i feel everything in this room start to spin
like mars get a grip
is this it??
grab the beretta and unload the clip
way too many people around 
im so sick of this

isolate myself to lock the beast in
everything is out in the open
and im so over it
im falling back again
im drinking again
im smoking all the time
just so i dont gotta feel a thing
maybe i should bite the bullet
its all her fault
i never wanted to be your savior 
some how u became my biggest hater
tell everyone u hate me than your on the phone with me a hour later
ive been having nightmares
this isn't me talking baby
its jus the medicine in my bloodstream
im not angry
i do this to let off steam
im already afraid of everything
what do four words even mean
im sick of living
all my texts green
i haven't been this alone
but no one is hitting up my phone
im destroying myself until im no one
i dont wanna be alone

i say that as my lungs fill up with smoke
this is how i cope
somedays i feel the rope tied around my throat
and somedays i feel like im in my zone
last night in the whip listening to sewerperson im cold
than it switches to 9tails - miles
i haven't felt okay in awhile
when i get drunk again ill say sorry to my family and my friends
than ill disappear again
will anyone check on me at my lowest point
i dont think so, so why should i care
everyone acts annoyed but i asked for help

im getting tired of fighting it
i feel everything in this room start to spin
like mars get a grip
is this it??
grab the beretta and unload the clip
way too many people around 
im so sick of this

clip!

STREAM

DESPAIR

Produced by jewelerbeats

Lyrics

I know you don't care about me at all
Still ain't learn to let go, thought by now that I'd be better off
I lost her but I ain't lose that feeling, still ain't got it off
They say life's a game, I wish it was so I could log off

Dealing with insomnia, I wish I could nod off
I gave so much love to her but she don't want me at all
Every thought I think is wrong, wish I could turn my head off
You're not here so I'm not better

I'm so fed up with myself
I'm weak, every week I just weep
Why'd I let her in my heart? Let her in my soul?
I can't stop, I can't let her go

I got love around me but not in my soul
Please, don't ever ask me why I feel so cold
Romeo and Juliet but you ain't want that role
Where'd you go? I been on my own

This is not a trend or a genre or a style
This is who I am, I been like this since a child
Always in my head, always had a heavy heart
Always holding it in, always falling apart

And I'm tired of it, I don't wanna do it no more
Break down in tears then end up on my floor
All of these years...what the fuck were they for?
I'll never know

I know you don't care about me at all
Still ain't learn to let go, thought by now that I'd be better off
I lost her but I ain't lose that feeling, still ain't got it off
They say life's a game, I wish it was so I could log off

Dealing with insomnia, I wish I could nod off
I gave so much love to her but she don't want me at all
Every thought I think is wrong, wish I could turn my head off
You're not here so I'm not better

inconsolable interlude.

Circles [PROD. sadcg]

Stay in Yo Lane!

Stay in Yo Lane! (LA Bass Edition)

no. 2

22 | vox/songwriter & engineer 

i make what i want my music isnt for everyone

email - m@scars.online

clip!

marsmal

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