Some of the songs that I've most enjoyed from different artists over the years or that mean a lot to me.
I tired to organise it in a way that the genres are not too over the place.
Please listen, they deserve it.
Different genres and vibes but 100% good stuff.

I think you should listen

prod. me

rest easy pops<33

dad, can you remember me?
cause i see those eyes are empty
i can't even eve talk with you cause u can't think
pls tell me when you look at me who do you see 
am i still your best buddy?
can u recognize somebody
i feel like ur soul has left
without ur body 
i hate to see u suffering

ever since u've been gone
shit's been different 
i hate myself
and can't take this distance 
been fucking my health 
i can feel the symptoms 
i need fucking help 
but can't face my feelings   

(i been hiding emotions
behind all the drinks
i been hiding emotions
behind all the weed 
people know about this
and still don't talk to me 
i might be fated to 
live the rest of my life all lonely)

dad, can you remember me?
cause i see those eyes are empty
i can't even eve talk with you cause u can't think
pls tell me when you look at me who do you see 
am i still your best buddy?
can u recognize somebody
i feel like ur soul has left
without ur body 
i hate to see u suffering

dad can u remember me?

produced by sleepwater leftquiet and heylog
w @heylog

im losing faith and abilities
i wish i was brave im never at ease
what did you say to me
nothing was made for me
nothing went the way of the willow
ill sit right here and wait by my window

picking leaves for you to see
i hate these trees when i cant breathe
im sick of me i said too much
i hate myself not scared to crush
im not scared to crush
i hate myself
not fair no touch
i did this to myself

come destroy me now i rlly wanna know
i locked inside your arms
i hate the way it goes
im locked inside a farm 
while u remove his coat
ive never had the time 
to let anyone close

heylog:
just a log and a tree standing open in fields
rough times for a being if u don't know how to heal
kill me lover, push below the ground
oh i can't stand it here, not even an ounce
oh you
oh my
come back
to my side
i dont know myself
dont go ill stay and get help

no i dont miss you
hate what u done to me
say that your in love me
200 hundred days
where i would see you
i made a mistake
now i cant see you

fields w/heylog

produced by xona, ruevi, & oc

big thank you to all individuals who helped make this song possible <3

@ruevi @prod-oc
@heylog
@hiraethsry
@sleepywater
@sinxi
@caspywaspy
@vilsynth
@valerii
@deadfishh

the lyrics were over 4000 characters and that's the limit for soundcloud ♥

-lyrics-
https://genius.com/Xona-avoid-ii-lyrics

xona

spotify

avoid II w/ ruevi, heylog, hiraeth, sleepwater, sinxi, casperrr, vil, valerii & deadfish

Lyrics

I don't know what I need
But I know what I want
But that girl don't need me
If she did, she wouldn't leave

I don't know what I see
Inside her evil eyes
But I keep that between
Me, myself and I

Shit isn't as hard to get over
As I be making it, got a disorder
You cross a line then I'm crossing a border
If pain was a tangible thing, I'm a hoarder

They be like "This niggah fire"
Preaching as they sing along like a choir
This shit too easy, don't even get tired
Not on drugs no more but I still feel wired

Losing my patience with all this
Bullshit I hate it, this life is an option
Love's in the air, I thought it was a toxin
I started finding myself when I lost it

I don't know what I need
But I know what I want
But that girl don't need me
If she did, she wouldn't leave

I don't know what I see
Inside her evil eyes
But I keep that between
Me, myself and I (x2)

spotify.

me, myself & i. | Produced by jewelerbeats

much love to @sleepywater <33
Produced by me ^-^

Lyrics:

(grasior)
you think your just so perfect
skeletons in your closet
faceless beast yeah you know it
but you lost with your 2 tricks

but you writing my phone
texting my phone yeah you feel so alone
you take me out
feel so loud

never thought the void could fill
this emptiness makes me shrill
the quietness that you built
fills me up with guilt

you watch the world in flames
tryna shift the blame
manipulate the world
to figure out your name

everything that you do leaves me in disbelief
count to three in your dreams damn you feel so unique
you hear the screams of the past yet you smoke n repeat
switch em out yeah you making em leave
baby running my mind but all I need is just me
everyday that you lie makes me feel one with peace
keep it up till you try to wave it all back
all your feeling are back but you feel so detached

(sleepwater)
push me in the ocean let me drown
wont be alive for long you know that now
feels way to open need way out
got me fleeing for safety a royal
i plead for ignorance in hell
im scared but here i bloody am
im facing death im in the sea
i would kill myself for you and me
baby i think that your the bee
baby i swear your in love w me
it was only you and me
baby i swear your in love w me
i wanna kill myself
baby you should kill me
i wanna kill myself
baby you should kill me

(grasior)
everything that you do leaves me in disbelief
count to three in your dreams damn you feel so unique
you hear the screams of the past yet you smoke n repeat
switch em out yeah you making em leave
baby running my mind but all I need is just me
everyday that you lie makes me feel one with peace
keep it up till you try to wave it all back
all your feeling are back but you feel so detached
-----------------------------------------

flower petals ✾

disbelief w/ sleepwater

produced by chalyre <3 

lyrics:
you make me
incomplete
no escaping
your cold reach

now my throat is sore
from saying your name
i'm not going to go
until you repay
the debt that you owe
its always the same 
for love

let go
of your hold

you say you love me
i would just die
i'll never be worthy
of your divine

you're killing me slowly
but i'll be fine

it's not like i'm better
from seeing the light

careworn

produced by speedlmt

lyrics:
before i found u
i was going through hell
oh do you miss me
im still going through hell
i still cant even tell
what its like to be me
she doesent miss me
she doesent miss me


i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations
i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations

she my bandage
walking through the forest empty handed
blood on my screen
with dirt on my shoes
where have you been
i sorta miss you
well no defiently do 
im shaking in my room
i really hate this house
im shaking in my room
i need a way out
im shaking in my room
im shaking in my room
shaking in my room

i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations
i vanish i go into hibernation
crucify me its isolation
no one will find me 
lost in the pine trees
walk right by me hallucinations

isolation

oh its not fair anymore
no its not fair anymore
no its not fair anymore

i just cant tell you enough
my thoughts been opening up
i never said it enough 
my heart was filled with your love

i would sacrifice my love just to be on your side
gimme just another day so that i can reside
while youre waiting at the gates, ill find somewhere to hide

i need somewhere to hide
i know youre in the fields looking at me over the light
if theres a chance that you hear me singing into the night
i need to tell you that ill love you till the end of the line

you know i always cared about you
i might sleep in water hang my head whilel i cry
been 2 years now im lost without you
take me to a forest filled with water and pine

its not fair anymore
its not fair anymore
its not fair anymore
its not fair anymore

how could you take away my best friend
ive got no one to trust
ill see your face in the end
your words fill my stomach making me who i am
you wouldnt have left me, i know ill see you again

enough

produced by heylog

lyrics:
no one
no faith
spacing
as i lie awake
when i see you then
i promise i won't leave again
woke up in terror, i'm feeling confused
cover my mouth as i just heard the news
how can it be?
how can it be true?
why god, do you take the things i love most
why's it the people who feel like a home
holding back tears
until i let go
facing
toward green
outside, you're all i see
i miss your praise
no matter what, you'd always stay
with me
i need to ease on the brakes
i feel my heart in my chest
i can't control cause it aches
and no one's feeling their best
and i'm not taking it light
you felt like my only friend
who'd be with me through the night
and be with me till the end
and i have so much to say
but at the same time i don't
all of it hurts in a way
that i can't even control
it comes and goes in a wave
and everytime it's unknown
and none of this is okay
i'd rather break every-
following footprints and trails
sunlight shines right through the trees
see beauty in each detail
please say that you're just hiding
no one
no faith
spacing
as i light awake
when i see u then
i promise i won't leave again
facing
toward green
outside, ur all i see
i miss you a lot
one of a kind
and filled with love

footprints & trails

all i want (cover)
enjoy

lyrics:

all I want is nothing more
to hear you knocking at my door
cause if i could see your face once more
i could die a happy man I'm sure

when you said your last goodbye
i died a little bit inside
i lay in tears in bed all night
alone without you by my side

but if you loved me
why’d leave me?
take my body
take my body
all i wanted
and all i needed
to find somebody
i'll find somebody

like you
you
you
you

cause you brought out the best in me
a part of me i'd never seen
you took my soul and wiped it clean
our love was made for movie screens

but if you loved me
why did you leave me?
take my body
take my body
all I want is
and all I need is
to find somebody
i'll find somebody

like you
you
you
you

all i want (cover)

non-profit


put a shotgun my mouth
pull the trigger and the pain will be gone

im still here but im barely breathing
im holding on by a string

knife in my gut i could taste the blood
so much said but all i feel is love
numb my pain with mud in red solo cups
i fill my lungs with smoke from nic and bud
tears flood my face im alone in this place
ill be dead when your gone , my mind has been made up

im just tired, thats all (neverforever.)

prod. heyzbee & yunny goldz

take my life i don’t want no one else
i hate myself so you made my heart melt
hatred runs deep i just need your help 
i can’t speak so i just gave myself, up for good

i don’t want to fight back 
cuz i am just worthless
you said i’m the surface 
compared to you, im hurting 
you sang a lullaby 
that said i’m not worth a night
one word turned into fights 
now i sit and harmonize

you really don’t have any friend 
they lied to you they just pretend
just cut them off and let it end 
i’m the one you need and depend
your family sucks they hate you too
you don’t need them just me and you
best friend so what, it doesn’t matter who
i’m the one you want, so only me pursue

i don’t want to fight back 
cuz i am just worthless
you said i’m the surface 
compared to you, im hurting 
you sang a lullaby 
that said i’m not worth a night
one word turned into fights 
now i sit and harmonize

melt

prod. @nevrfall

why do i even bother
kill me with your gray eyes
leaving me paralyzed
you probably care for someone better
i've been overthinking
crying while i'm writing

foolish of me getting all my hopes up
always first to talk when i should really keep my mouth shut
i know i've been such a burden
you meant so much more to me than any other person

conjure the delusion
every time i see your name 
i skip a beat because it's all in disillusion
tell me what i am now
just a boy to keep you company 
when you're cooped up in your house

ghost me
save me from the trouble
keep me from the struggle
i'm loathing
you're so irreplaceable
i'm easy to replace though
hold onto
everything that you said
echoes on in my head
invest in you
always tend to do this
end up being useless

foolish of me getting all my hopes up
always first to talk when i should really keep my mouth shut
i know i've been such a burden
you meant so much more to me than any other person
issues with attachment
pull me in with every single fraction of a second
could you set me down gently
lay us all out on the table i appreciate the honesty

maybe the lead would taste better than this

lyrics ⬇️
when autumns around the corner i feel much worse
cuz i like the birds
and you held my worth
i think that the time against me holds up a curse
where i can’t discern 
what did i learn

dont let me back in
i wont get anything done
cuz
up in my head i been doing enough
youre making me lust when i really want love
and your breaking my trust when im off of the drugs

so i dont wanna do this
oh i hate to shove
but just gotta do it
i gotta give it up

how could i be losing my touch
i dont wanna prove that life been rough
but everything ends when it blows into dust
and i tried to find a friend just to gimme what i want

(Casperrr)

u cursed on me a spell
or sumthing like that 
just like icarus fell
im falling with no catch
ño one hold me tight 
or keep me sight 
at least when im at the verge
of~ commiting suicide 

im sorry u rotted me to the core
just something i can't ignore 
the visual display was nasty 
and all i can see is  gore 
if u'd see it thanr u'd be bored 
i wish dat u'd change but u can't anymopre

tragic
slicing all my arteries 
bleeding out
spilling, fallin of the kitchen sink
coping now 
with what u wanted me to be 
wanted me for urself
that's why u tried to kill me 

\

artery w/casperrr (blocktane)

prod: never forever 
master: https://soundcloud.com/vito2300

put aside my emotion
i wasn't important 
he touched someone else
that night my body was forfeit
i like it when he record it 
watch it back and feel gorgeous 
i think i need help 
but i'm so good at ignoring,
ignoring it 

ima pour this bottle all out
till i feel my life breaking down 
and i hate myself even now 
don't know what that's all about
and i hate my songs 
won't show my face 
took a couple steps back 
went m.i.a
insane 
didn't learn my lesson 
nothing ever mattered when i try my best and
most days i just feel like a reject 
friends fake n then ask for my preset
hands up, 
asked god for a reason 
blood soaked and i beg for the meaning
most days wake up and i'm screaming 
and my body just shake like im fiending
painful, i remember the feeling 
stitch myself cause i dream i'm in pieces

important

lyrics:

Was it weird just to end the call
With 'I might move to montreal'
Pack a story of somebody else
Someone who isn’t like me at all
Would you think just to hold my hand
Yeah I know that’s not part of the plan
It’s just a way to recognize this place
And for you to say that you know who I am

What does anybody wanna be
What does everybody wanna see now
Who does anybody wanna be
What does everybody wanna see now

I might not be so terrified
‘Cause what use is not closing my eyes
When the view from my window’s now
That old house torn down for a new highrise
And what about the oak tree left next to it
Do you think it gives a shit at all, I don’t know
It’ll breathe and be a little confused
But that’s exactly how I am before my daily fix

Of a bittersweetened affirmation
Said god knows where in union station
Still playing games of imitation  
For what, for what
For a hesitant first invitation
To some party planned for graduation
To hear the same three conversations
For what, for what

What does anybody wanna be
What does everybody wanna see now
Who does anybody wanna be
What does everybody wanna see now

Will I be less inclined to lie
In a city I’ve been to twice, I know
It’s too early to be sending gifts
But before I’d leave could you just get me a hit

Of a bittersweetened affirmation
Said god knows where in central station
Still playing games of imitation  
For what, for what
For a hesitant first invitation
To some party planned for graduation
To hear the same three conversations
For what, for what

Et c’est tout mon choix, n'est-ce pas mon ami
Tu l'as dit cent fois dans un rêve, juste vas-y
Quand le jour viendra je le comprendrai
Mais pourquoi, pourquoi

montreal

corggins -  cant allow this (killedmyself)

prod by melon @melonsly <333

i think its wise
to let it go unsaid
theres words that dont sit right
dont know if id regret em
but youve been so unkind 
were signs i just misread em
these feelings tucked inside 
only show through if i let em

why do i
feel so replaceable 
wonder why
thought i could wait for anyone
this might come back to bite me
if u listen at all
at every step know youl fight me
wont get far at all

u dont understand
i cant talk to u
say it all in ur absense
if i wrote a letter id find it in half 
i thought it'd be better when i got attached
u dont understand
i cant talk to u
say it all in ur absense
if i wrote a letter id find it in half 
i thought it'd be better when i got attached

i think its wise
to let it go unsaid
theres words that dont sit right
dont know if id regret em
but youve been so unkind 
were signs i just misread em
these feelings tucked inside 
only show through if i let em

unkind

prod by stezzyxl and xav0id 
goodbye 

lyrics:
i need some space
i need a breather 
u wanna break?
i cant believe her
u wanna go?
it dosent make any sense
u were my home
and now u made a mess

take a second to relax 
take a second just for me
i dont
feel alright when i dont fit ur degree
u can
talk all u want
acting like ill never see
all u want
all u want
it wont bother me
take a second to relax 
take a second just for me
i dont
feel alright when nothing feels as what i seems
u can
laugh all u want
acting like ill never see
all u want
all u want
it wont bother me

im 1 step closer to rewind time
and i pray to god just to clear my mind
and i stood up straight, and i left behind
the only girl that caught my eyes

i saw myself
within ur eyes
oh my my
oh my my

xav0id -
take me too
the place u stay
oh i want you
to call my name 
take me too
the place u stay
oh i want you
to call my name 

xav0id -
the love I have for u
its why I need you gone
it'll never be the same
you've become my bane
im sorry for the pain
but this is what u've made
 
Just forget about me
its better that I'm gone
i still wish this didn't end
must I let u go
i can't get over u
heartache's all that remains

our final goodbye w/ xav0id

prod. me (dawsin)
composed by (dawsin)

lyrics:
look that pawn in his eyes
as you continue
to sacrifice
i can listen to the ghosts in my head
my head

I'm burning alive in this room
so hot in here i vision the fumes
left by everyone, i guess this my doom
then i formally invite my ex's to my tomb
to my tomb
so you see my body dismembered and skewed
i saw you by that grace, white cloak pretty face, you've never been
more rude

i left my body at home
and my mind is so weak
I'm traveling for miles
and the people don't speak
i tried for awhile
but no words was fled
i hate all their smiles
like why are they happy?
it doesn't make sense
it's not meant to be
maybe I'm dead or maybe I'm freed
I'm hoping for peace
I'm hoping for peace

I'M NOT DONE TALKING
(I AM THE NEW)
LOOK AT ME
(ORDER)
AM I JUST AN OBJECT TO YOU?

(LOUDER)
(LOUDER)
(LOUDER)

"the park on the lake,
we spent the whole day there
just the two of us, staring at the water"

I'm buried alive
i feel the nerves and they go
she always flirting with me
but me i watch my tone
why am i at this party?
why do i even go?
ill just sit here an think abt it and head home
i can't even go to bed when i want
hear the voices and the taunts
ouu the taunts

please don't leave
this ain't my full potential
please don't go
I'm not done talking
to you
to you
turn around
look at me
am i just an object to you

pawn

I'm just a random guy who sometimes has some inspiration and some motivation to do some music related things but it's quite rare tbh

I think you should listen

MDigidrop