it's hard

lyrics:
i scribbled symphonies of peace to cope with finding out the truth
worked as needed reaching what middle school me would think was cool
fiddling pens and pencils pensive wasn’t picky with the tool
i’d use for some naive translation of my angst and fragile mood

i can’t afford it now

growing pains replaced with what the bills are like in winter now
since the cold ascended i can’t shake the taste of poetry
phonetically imperfect pretty speech protruding out of me
im cramming syllables to cry of colder temps and picture books
reliving twisted memories romanticizing what it took
to be alive surviving prerip jeans and social trends
extending my insistence on reliving those remember when’s

it’s a fucked up toxic endeavor

middle child needs attention to feel valid who’da guessed it?
choose an evening to feel hollow with my grief i’ve been selective
been a lot of things over the years but never been objective
i’m a passive dude

some would call it sitting fence and when i’m honest i probably would too
at my expense i picked the easiest escape when i could
now im desperate to do something i should

cause there’s something bout finality that scares me
wavered care perpetuated the impression that i’m distant and aware
of ticking hours minutes seconds sticking strictly to my regiment
rejected any message i was yet to learn my lesson
started strong and i accepted that’s enough to use the leverage
and projected progress farther now it’s a little more than hard
to understand i’m on a limit always finish weaker than i started
know how to begin but stutter further in the tempo how ironic

looking in the mirror a song by melmige thank you for listening [prod. eeryskies]

then, i saw myself

a collection of songs that you maybe will see yourself in

dedicated to rose and onlyfriend, two people that see in me what i can't always see myself

huge thank you to shizukesa for providing a beautiful verse on revisionist

thank you for listening

then, i saw myself [prod bailey daniel]

to grieve [prod eeryskies]

that's not what i said [prod engless]

revisionist (feat shizukesa) [prod surp]

lyrics

???
aint gotta do me like that
codeine in my tummy make the stummy look fat
i died and met God but he sent me right back
try to wear my shoes you aint walking past the flak
news flash! kiddamo caught stealing from the saks?!
aint brushing my teeth when im collecting these plaques
said that i was corny but at least i aint dax
know they start ducking when the chopper go quack

i been sipping wok but im not thirsty
im off these pain killers you can never hurt me
imma ask for His forgiveness even though im not deserving
but imma spend my whole life proving that im worthy
imma spend my whole check on shoes and 30s
you can never hate on me if youre over 30
dadstar sneakers they thought my shoes were dirty
ask me what my shirt is
you aint never heard of it
i will refuse to buy it if its inside the mall
just know its nothing personal i had to cut u off
amiro on the vertical i know God helped me write this song

aint gotta do me like that
codeine in my tummy make the stummy look fat
i died and met God but he sent me right back
try to wear my shoes you aint walking past the flak
news flash! kiddamo caught stealing from the saks?!
aint brushing my teeth when im collecting these plaques
said that i was corny but at least i aint dax
know they start ducking when the chopper go quack

met God (prod. aurum)

Produced by sai & lune
Featuring @kanashisadface
Mixed by @decksmusic
Mastered by @anxietyxattacks

LYRICS
I wish I could say that I'm happy for you
But I won't lie no
You speak a lot
But it's rarely the truth
Oh what a waste of time

Those years we spent together
Guess they didn't mean much at all
In dreams you're still here with me
It seems I can't just sleep this off

Time spent with you I can't get back
In pursuit of the things I can not have
Without you it's all meaningless
So I'll just go back to bed

(Kanashi)
Guess I'll go back to bed
What a fucking loser I've become
And I can't understand why I didn't run
I could see the signs from the start
Yeah I never meant nothing to you
You don't even feel bad do you
Well of course you don't
You're a liar and a fake
You're the reason why I lie awake

Listen on Spotify!

Sleep This Off w/ Kanashi (Prod. sai & lune)

https://soundcloud.com/evergardens/remorse original

lyrics:
were u always unsure
did u care for a while
tend to find myself
hoping we reconcile

and now its not urs
see ur losing ur smile
u must feel some remorse
to act so jealous now

ooooo

dont u cry its getting u nowhere
you come to find ur actions have consequences
i know u act under false pretenses

dont u cry its getting u nowhere
you come to find ur actions have consequences
i know u act under false pretenses

were u always unsure
did u care for a while
tend to find myself
hoping we reconcile

and now its not urs
see ur losing ur smile
u must feel some remorse
to act so jealous now

remorse(cover)

july w/ kiddamo

Produced by mackk 

(Luvflorent)
Do you hate me?
Well I hate me 
I don’t need you 
Why you need me?

The sun stops,I’m stun locked 
Cartier frames hide my tears 
Cartier frames hide my tears 
Pills in the drain, I’m so scared 
I’m always fucking anxious 
It’s why I yearn for the pain pills 
My stomach is always aching 
You said you hate me

I need Zoloft 
I need to get gone 
I need Zoloft 
I need to get gone 

(Vails)
why’d you hate me?
baby thought u rated me 
I can’t breathe for real
So caught up in all the feels
Yeah

Dropping a pill so I feel levitated
I’m breaking the silence so now ur frustrated 
I promise to u since u left I’m so jaded 
these pictures of us really seem to be tainted 
I’m faded I can’t seem to cope with reality
Baby it’s hard cus u hated me actually
just cus I’m changing, and breaking 
Don’t mean you should leave me

luvflorent w/ vails & mackk - hide my tears

prod. quip

bass by @notdiscxrdia

pass out for your own entertainment 
freaked out on my own i'll explain it
watered down 
don't you slip through my fingertips 
started a sentence but you didn't let me 
finish it 

pass away 
i been stuck in my head since 
yesterday 
you know just what to say 
no panicking 
cuz the pathway is clear now 


i wouldn't pass you up
before i passed away 
ain't seen the light behind those eyes
in the longest time 
we've been apart don't know what to do
you are the one that i cannot lose 

oh i wont budge 
we running out of time now
i dont wanna figure this shit out alone
know you want your freedom that don't sound like home 
you said to me with a grin on your face 


(be the big man)
why do i seem at fault 
(be the big man)
why am i sinking down
like it's quicksand 

(be the big man) 
never gonna live that down
(be the big man) 
i cannot make it out 
like it quicksand 
the struggle makes it worse
oh, wow like it's quick sand 
like it quicksand 

outro

baby just ask what you want from me
i'll do my best 
speak with you chest 
do it confidently 

i'm in attached 
my body's there and im floating free
i cant see forest from trees
i can't swim back if its deep 
just tell me what to do 

on a mission am i 
counting my issues 
giving up 
the numbers getting too high 

you got a way 
you got a way with words 
the way that you talk 
i'm wide awake 
baby you pacing me 
love what i see

then, i saw myself [prod bailey daniel]

melmige

Recent comments

Vails

zoltar

decks

shizukesa.

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