This battle was made in collaboration with Leo Barqui for the 100 Hour Challenge!

Rosenthal as Bermuda Triangle
Leo Barqui as Illuminati
Writing by Leo Barqui and Rosenthal
Mixed by Light
Art by Rosenthal
Beat by Ihaksi

BERMUDA: (0:20)

You’re not gonna want to view what befalls the people who cross Bermuda (cross Bermuda)
They’re lost and gone without proof, but it already seems we’ve forgotten you, huh? (-gotten you, huh?)
You haven’t got a lot to lose, for a secret society you seem basic
Makes sense you’re made of a bunch of tools when, you copied the Freemasons
I can’t even dream of trying 
To size up the sheep that believe your lies
To unite the elite to defeat the pious,
Act right but you’re really an equal side
Convinced that they’re different, the witless sit still in silence 
Within businesses and hidden from the light
They think they’re bright but with all that hiding
In the dark, you’re nowhere near being enlightened

ILLUMINATI: (0:52)

You call yourself the devil’s, right? Caught a couple bodies while I caught half the body of Christ
Disappearances crashing down in plain sight; visions with no explanation: pseudo-signs
Now a Florida man’s begging for a new chance, you should be warned in advance, I light a beat up
Open up an eye and see everything, while the only eye that you’ve ever seen is Katrina’s
After Van Winkle Ripped your story open, it became Fate that your shores filled with Sand
It’s less of an Argonaut, more of an Argosy when your pulp following’s traversed by Gaddis
You’ll be Lost in Limbo, on a road to becoming less learned of than Bimini
I’m in the pockets of every last heathen this weakening region’s decided to leave alive

BERMUDA: (1:24)

You got the wrong idea with your awful theorems, I’d rather you fuck off and leave ‘cause 
When you cruise through my Business, you’re gonna pay up - and I’m not talkin’ Visa
The only real mark that everybody has heard that’s Illuminati Confirmed
Are the eyes that mean God will and always observe, and it’s drawn on a bill with a dollar of worth
These fraudulent words of an entrepreneur aren’t killing the industry
(Ay) This hypocrite gives into what their rich members need (Uh) While I’m giving these sinking fleets entering me shipping fees (Ay ay)
You’re not hot with sixty degrees (Alright) Talk shop with the kids on your feed (Alright)
You're on top with a pyramid scheme, (Uhuh) but it’s built on a rinse and repeat of a billion memes

ILLUMINATI: (1:56)

Just as scattered as the theories you flare up; 
I drew in whole nations, you lost the Connemara
Claiming magnet pulls? Your only poles are the ones you lose; 
My influence kills, survivors landed in front of you
So pull out a compass, try to read it, 
But with Strict Observance you couldn’t even touch the needle
Theodore was in my pocket when when Bavaria could not show the 
Same human error that’s turning this fucking Connover
Claim I stole from the Masons? That’s tame when the same could be taken from the flights you hijacked
Even if that wormhole really does exist, I wouldn’t travel through it to earn this battle’s time back
So make like the Atalanta, sink down in shame since you’ve lost outright
I remain the top with no effort, and I rolled and smoked you like the Kusche you were downed by

Outro (2:28)

Bermuda Triangle VS Illuminati - Rap Battles of Whatever - ft. Leo Barqui

Full battle on YouTube: https://youtu.be/XrRrCOoQIEA


Condiment King Verse 1

I was scared by this nefarious nuclear boy
But I mustard some courage after hearing his voice (ha!)

I cleverly conceptualized each crime I committed
While you’re powered by the sun and you’re still the most dim-witted (moron!)

My guns top this beef, while you’re acting pretty hammy
And you lost it ‘cause you couldn’t start a nuclear family

Man, you wished to have a girl after one look at her face
But you couldn’t even take her breath away when you took her to space


Nuclear Man Verse 1

(RAAA) Your love life’s not better than this
I will not even bother asking you where a woman is

You think brains beat brawn? Well I don’t care
But if what’s inside matters, I ignore your underwear

I generate heat like Venus (RAAA)
There is a big gap between us (RAAA)

Bigger than the ones that I made in Chinese wall
I am powerful god of the Sun like RAAAAAA


Condiment King Verse 2

My condiments earn compliments, I’m confident my consonants
Are competent, the consequence? I’m conquerin’ your common quips (woo!)

I’ll relish in glory, assert my dominance
You’re just the most forgotten villain novice in Metropolis


Nuclear Man Verse 2

(RAAA) I hurt people, and that includes you
(RAAA) You are a freako, like Luthor’s nephew

I will squeeze red out of you, and I do not mean ketchup
You will not even be healed by a mayo clinic checkup


Condiment King Verse 3

You act very strong, but your critics do better bashing
Since your foe fixed the wall just by… looking at it? (what?)

You have have Wolverine press-ons but aren’t sharp when you’re attackin’
Since you died and the cause was a nuclear reaction?

Wait scratch that, mad brat, weaker than the Pack Rat
At least he had a gat strapped when dealing with the black bat

And even he’s not that daft to be inside a shaft trapped
A packet of Tabasco would outmatch all of your wack raps


Nuclear Man Verse 3

You are pathetic, check my genetics
Strong and athletic, far from synthetic 

(RAAA) Win by more than a hair, you’re not strong
And I put the nuke in nuclear when I drop bombs

I threw, zapped, jumped on, and tossed rocks at Superman
(RAAA) Your head is not the only thing in pickle, stupid man

Nuclear Man rhymes get a radio active
With stronger flames than the one that put you in casket


Condiment King Verse 4

You’re powered up now, but your prototype was not impressing
You were stoner Scissorhands, (ick) and badly needed dressing (yikes)

You aren’t scary, you’re out cold without power
I’m the czar of sauerkraut, you're making the crowd sour


Nuclear Man Verse 4

Silence! Destroy Condiment King
But first I have fun, remove mind control thing

Let us see if Buddy Standler has more writing skill
I bet you are even less funny on your free will


Condiment King Verse 5

Wait, where am I? What am I doing?
Hey, aren’t you that villain from the 4th Rocky movie?

Or that Superman foe whose ratings were so low
He was non-renewable in comics? Well, gotta go


Nuclear Man Verse 5

(RAAA) Do not to try to run, my speed is supersonic
In more than one way I will destroy failed comic

You wasted my time so I knock your lights out
And…

► CREDITS: 

RaccoonBroVA as Nuclear Man

Matt Raichous as the Condiment King 

Pixel Chris as the Condiment King 

Written by Theme Park Avenue

Beat prod. by Simon Bates of the Audio Network

Mixed by Nikki

Cover Art by Taiga

Nuclear Man vs The Condiment King. PowerPoint Rap Battles

Credits:
Swizkii as “Steve Raglan” / William Afton
SimplyRazzy as Ghostface
Written by Grasman
Mixed and Mastered by Jort
Beat produced by InsaneBeatz

Announcer:
Rap Battles!
Ghostface!
Versus!
“Steve Raglan”!
Begin!

“Steve Raglan”:

Scream 7s in the trash, yet you sit before me asking for a job?
Well it’s not that easy, sense you and that pog face fell off
I started off strong, got the audience to love me
You started off strong, but fell off by your 4th movie
I’m Steve raglan, I spend my time counseling 
Stuff you in the back of my trunk, and leave you rotting in it 
You're a high schooler? Not the best neck for strangling 
But I’ll make an exception and leave your greasy hair dangling 
*Ahem*
I'm a smash hit! Check the box office breaks.
You’re a smash hit! When a TV falls on your face!
So sit, sit, sit, I’ve got a tip for you,
Get out with the old, and in with the new.


Ghostface:

Hello, hello? I think there's something wrong,
Is your connection terminated or was that verse just off?
Sayin’ you started off strong? I’m all for twisting the plot,
But the only people you’re manipulating are bots!
Oh you’re played by Matt lillard? Well me too,
But they uncovered your mask quicker than scooby doo!
Cant handle killing one dude, so you sent out your kid
Im gutting peeps’ like a fish, all while serving a diss 
Yeah, I know who you are, the secrets you keep 
The mask that you wear, thinking that you were discrete 
Having no motivation can be sometimes scary
But god, Scott, please get more writers on your team 
 

“Steve Raglan” (as The Yellow Rabbit):

You couldn’t just leave alone could you! It’s perfect!
I’m dropping this outdated ghoul way faster than Ortega did
Dragged on so long, and now they don’t know what to do
Looks like your writers became even clumsier than you!
It's time you retire, your mask is cracked and wilting,
Think you're spitting fire? I brought down the whole damn building!
failed to get a shot on Sid, while i'm stacking up kills,
you had one job! yet you can't do it in 6 films! 
critiqued a genre and then you became what you dissed
how about instead of your voice, you maybe change up your twists!
I opened up a place of joy that the children enjoyed
The only fun from outta your films are you getting destroyed!
I may clown on your films, but there's one thing I like greatly
you die in every one of your movies, now that’s symmetry!
keep complaining on how they exposed my trap
but you stay dead, I always come back. 


Ghostface:

You took the actor and the knife swipe from me 
It is flattering, but you’re outdoing the symmetry 
For a genius in robotics, they found you out quick
What was your game plan? Like what, did you think:
I’ll lure my victims brother with this trap that i’ll spring
Maybe chill and watch him hear the animals sing
Do nothing for four nights, and wait till last minute
To show up, kick him around and stab my own kid? (oh please)
Man I’m 6 movies deep, and I’m still making em’ scream
You couldn’t get people shouting with your 6 minutes on screen! 
Keep creeping on kids, you ain't threatening to me 
A cupcake brought you down worse than EDP!
and the kids ain't scared either, you ain’t fooling no one 
Acted all scary and was taken down by crayola 
So maybe tighten up those springs before you come to out play
Or you'll be another soul getting dragged away!

Ghostface vs. “Steve Raglan” -Rap Battles!

Main Cast:
‪TheToppo as This Man (Audio)
‪Powerofdan‬ as This Man (Video)

‪Freshy Kanal‬ as The Smiling Man (Audio)
TaigaTonic as The Smiling Man (Video)

Beat by: Freshy Kanal
Mixed by: Freshy Kanal
Written by: Freshy Kanal, TaigaTonic, Powerofdan, and TheToppo
Thumbnail by: Powerofdan


This Man:
I’m a cryptid shipped across the globe, they send my pics in envelopes
I got you shiverin down your toes, let’s see the chicken cross the road
You’re just a little tale that will never amount to stardom
Smiling at the moon like you got a past in Arkham

People look at me and I leave their minds boggled
People look at you and think you're at the bottom of a bottle
Not a figment of imagination, so they glance harder
But I’m sure they will find me before you’d ever find a dance partner

The Smiling Man:
Hello there…This man should have stayed in bed
But if you wanna tango, I’ll be sure to break a leg

I’m patiently waiting for a stranger to wander late
Hop scotch on my pavement and I turn the chalk to body shapes
You’re playing awful games with people in a trauma state
By sloppily attaching your face with a constant copy paste

A hoax in cinema and a hoax in all of folklore
All your films went south, no wonder you preach to Go North
Forced yourself on every Wanted poster with a dead smile
When you're in my domain, then you’ll really be an X file

Busted out the cage, now the posterboy is targeted
Since the concrete jungle went bananas for guerilla marketing
Maybe those articles should follow news for next time
So push those eyebrows to your hair if you want better headlines

This Man:
You’ll lose sleep over me until your eyes are scuffed
A state of mind around the world, you can’t leave Iowa
I’ll chase you where the demons watch until you flee the block
I send folks to the therapist, but you look like you need a doc

Got no lover so now you go stalk the whole town
How’re you quick on your feet but still can’t get a hoedown
You make em leave the neighbourhood, we’re hardly equal
And your busking couldn’t make a buck, is that why you charge at people?

I give them their worst nights, you’re stuck on the curbside
I got sketched a million times, you’re sketchy on first sight
You dawn a daunting smile so you can mask all the screams
And strut the streets at night because this man is in your dreams

The Smiling Man:
You played a twisted game with unknowing contenders 
But your real life sightings aren’t much but REM-embers
Cops investigated your case across the country
And the unanimous conclusion was... that you’re ugly

Your face is in our heads yet no one knows who you are
Memories of this dream have been fading away since the start
Yet it pales in the moonlight, now there’s none left to save
You can dance with the devil while I waltz on your grave

The Smiling Man Vs Ever Dream This Man

Full battle on YouTube: https://youtu.be/JvajhkTNjZo

► CREDITS: 

Vanessa as Ms. Frizzle
Twitter: @VanessaBenVO

KingSpirals as Mary Poppins
 Twitter: @KingSpiralsVA

Written by
PowerPoint Rap Battles 

Ms. Frizzle Art by WAN

Mary Poppins Art by SkydivingQuagga

Beat Prod. by Tone Jonez & Leo Barqui

Beat arranged by Theme Park Avenue

Mixed by Nikki

Thumbnail by SPM1000

► LYRICS:

Mary Poppins Verse 1

Spit spot, Miss, you’re facing Mary Poppins
I’m punctual and don’t appreciate your tardy pop-ins (Now…!)

Zip your lips, we are not a codfish or the tuna you were in the mouth of
This is the second, wait, third time you’ll get devoured

My knowledge and umbrella are the envy of a Weather Man
You have a flying bus, yet your lessons are pedestrian and treacherous!

Now let me get your measurements
Oh, eccentric lecturer whose bus is the one thing that isn’t reckless

I’m laughing with the Banks, while your outings don’t end happily, so Valerie
You don't even deserve a teacher’s salary (goodness!)

You put your pupils in danger on nearly every trip
The truth is very cold, so please don’t take off your helmets, kids


Ms. Frizzle Verse 1

Good morning, class! Please excuse Nanny McFreaky
Her style’s just a little bit too old school, right Phoebe? 

She thinks she can’t be rattled, so let’s buckle up, kids
And prove how easily some teaching can get under her skin! (Woo!)

We’ve traveled Mary’s whole brain, and our findings are outstanding
Based on all the nooks and crannies, she is quite a crooked nanny

She leaves Bert in the dust when he can barely get by
It seems the only thing that she can teach is class… divide!

While you have the kids tidy your room
We find cocoons and then we fly to the moon, and I’d invite you too

But you’re already on a trip with your magic flying nonsense 
Be careful when you’re blitzed, lightning strikes the highest object (get it?!)


Mary Poppins Verse 2

A woman like myself doing drugs? You must be joking
But if that’s your finest comedy, my uncle won’t be floating

Though he’s often very positive, he thinks your show’s the grossest
With its imagery so sickening, I couldn’t sugarcoat it

Oh, the winds have changed, and Miss Frizzle’s flows are blowing 
There’s little else to say, I’ve clearly bested my opponent (oh!)

And I know just the way to end this most triumphant moment 
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious


Ms. Frizzle Verse 2

Your fame has joined the other nannies gone in the gale
I quizzed my students on your novel, and all of them failed!

Walt said you’d never be forgotten but that promise was frail
Now you’re like Liz, no one cares about the loss of your tale

You hate logic, but it takes little explaining to know 
That Magic School Bus is the greatest educational show (that’s right!)

While my viewers’ brains grow, all your viewers’ brains go
Mary Sue has been schooled, guess she should have stayed home (oh!)

Ms. Frizzle vs Mary Poppins. PowerPoint Rap Battles

ORIGINALLY UPLOADED ON 09/25/2022

LYRICS

Buddy:
‘SCUSE ME! Mind telling me who’s the guy with the giant head?
LOSER! Lookin’ like a reject straight from Smiling Friends
SUCKER! Don’t try to fight, ‘cuz if you think the mic’s my end
DO THE MATH! Mix with me and it’s not the boss who winds up dead
So try your best, ‘cuz if you’re ragging on this ragdoll, then I’d just stretch
STUPID! Doesn’t take comparing art styles to know that my lines are best
DUMMY! My style’s fresh, while your blue-collar ass is stuck in black and white
AY! Your violence is mid as fuck, couldn’t even ruin my appetite  
Don’t try to mess with me, dawg you’re an NPC
You couldn’t block out my voice with your MP3
Bud, I’m a bad toy, I’m known for making mad noise
Thinkin’ you could pummel me? Go and suck my sack, boy!
NUMBNUTS! I don’t need my arsenal to fire shots
‘Cuz the only firing that’s happening is by your job
IDIOT! I already won, so instead of spitting, shut it
Go and make like Flash support, bucko, and Kick the Bucket

Employee:
Dealing with brats like you ain’t really on my payroll
Not exactly in the mood to go aggro on this a-hole
But I’ll try to make this fight quick, I gotta meet with the board at ten
So I’ll drop bars to kick Buddy right off of the App Store again
I got the tools to dispense, I’ll burn and trash this doll
You’re only remembered in ads while I’m intern-ational
My collection’s cemented while your fame’s still getting milked for all it’s worth
Shit, I think I’d actually stay with the office work
I’d pick the gun and shoot right through you
And make Playgendary feel my hits like you were voodoo
I’ll give you credit you fulfill your purpose 
It’d be better though if I could just get one fucking word in
Could you just shut the fuck up for a second? God, I’ve had it
I’ll take my bare hands and rip up this smiling shitbag’s fabric
Take the gadgets, send you packing, take this goddamn dummy down
And leave you like every other mobile app, dead in the fucking ground

CREDITS

Fightmarker as The Buddy

littleflecks as The Employee

Written by Rabi
Beat prod. by SYKO
Mixed and mastered by Glitchdude
Art by BMB
Cover art by Rabi

Kick The Buddy vs. Whack Your Boss - Rap Battle

ORIGINALLY UPLOADED ON 10/31/2023

LYRICS

Eyeless Jack:
Why’d you think I’d be scared by this mime shit?
You should’ve thought twice before steppin’ up to Eyeless
But now I’m ‘boutta write shit to leave your body lifeless
Lookin’ like the Babadook in a mid-life crisis
I already know all you’re gonna spit is hot trash
Rippin’ Stephen King’s pages and throwin’ that up on Wattpad
I don’t got any eyes for you to stick your needles in
I get adrenaline pumping just from a pic of me leanin’ in
It’s Eyeless Jack, you know when I attack
I’m spreading red on your color palette of white and black
So don’t try fighting back, ‘cuz I ain’t fuckin’ frightened, Jack
I drop the heat like hot tar when I go up to light a track
Tried to make a kid happy, the attic got locked
It ate away at your loneliness like Jack In The Box
Then you were so touch-starved, took the drunkie and split him
This shit is child’s play like taking candy from your victims

Laughing Jack:
What a surprise... well, hi, Jackie
You wanna fight, Jackie? Then I’ll oblige, Jackie
But just try attacking, get me with that knife slash and
They’ll never find that body of yours, just like your eyes, Jackie!
I’m your imaginary friend
‘Cause the remnants of your mind show no sanity is left
I’m the sound inside your head, this clown has no weakness
To this Blue Man Group sleep paralysis demon!
How’d you get so iconic there, buster?
Could it be because of Mr CreepyPasta, I wonder
Or maybe your blank slate of a character’s what they wanna see
A cookie-cutter, carbon copy, Jeff the Killer wannabe
That cult did you good, bud, you cut out all your fake friends
Built yourself a name along killer teens with the same trends
But I’ll make this painless, a quick death for this blind freak
You can treat this battle like a liver, fucking bite me

Eyeless Jack:
Nice go, monochrome, but I’m leavin’ ya folded now
I’m glad I don’t got any eyes ‘cuz you’d probably poke ‘em out
Like look at that thing, that nose is gigantic
That party hat schnoz’s the only thing causing panic
Stuck in isolation after Isaac’s leave
You put an “I” in creepypasta – ICP
So can it with the snuff shit, ‘cause I can’t even pick between
You or your creator on which one of you’s the biggest creep

Laughing Jack:
Think your shots could be lethal?
This worm couldn’t stomp out a beetle
Make like your brother, leave while you can
Or get squashed like a spider, POP GOES THE WEASEL
I’ve heard you’re surgical with cuts, here’s a personal murder, bud
Tear out organs, internals, guts ‘til all you do is gurgle blood
Fill your body with insects and after it goes silent, black
This smile’s the only thing that you’ll remember, Eyeless Jack

CREDITS

Spadical as Eyeless Jack

Luke Reardon as Laughing Jack

Written by Rabi and Fightmarker
Additional writing help from Snakebite126
Beat prod. by Insanebeatz
Mixed and mastered by Freshy Kanal
Cover art by HauntedCicadaSongs

Eyeless Jack vs. Laughing Jack - Rap Battle

KELLEN DE VOS - WITH GOD

2 man blitz❗️💥 - tkayy (feat : KB)

where im from

Josh Chichester as The Announcer
----------------------------------
Leannaire as Steven Universe and Stevonnie 
----------------------------------
JMBRaps as Clarence
----------------------------------
Lyrics:
Clarence:
Hi I’m Clarence! Lemme make one thing apparent!
Your corny Connie loving’ self is like your Gem, transparent 
I’ve got something this Alien needs know, I’ll drown you like Lapis with my flow! 
With Jeff and Sumo I’ll unload, a second ass kicking on mah foe! 
Spittin’ Millions of disses with a rhyme scheme not too elaborate 
I’ll defeat this herm-afro-dite like his name was Joshua Maverick
Challenging me to a lyrical Sumo match? That I can’t re-”fuse”
You have “gem powers”? Well at least I’m not as uptight as you! (Ooh!)

Steven Universe:
I won’t need help from the Crystal Gems to beat up this Drama Queen 
Your “life lessons” are even worse than your dental hygiene 
Quit your ranting and just go back to looking up to Santa
Nicolas Cage here couldn't shield himself from his own piñata
Trap you in a no-fun Dungeon, so weird; Onion’s impressed 
Clarence, Wendell-usion wears off then you’ve got nothing left
Heated lyrics like Ruby, and there's nothing you can do!
Cuz even with my weaknesses I’m still “Stronger Than You” 

Clarence:
Frybo you with rhymes, go back to your dad and mourn 
I could have a better rap, just using a squeeze horn
My disses are Straight Illin’, spitting sick like the flu
And say, Uncle Grandpa has a simpler plot than you do
Not even a Mother could love your series’s crappy pilot 
This “superior” life form can’t even keep a healthy diet 
So calm down, your rapping sounds worse than when you sing
Shatter ya to small fractures, you can’t be recovering

Steven Universe:
I’m a rapping Ace-dia! You’re rated I for insane!
We’ll have Towering Intellect when Connie and I combine our brains!

Stevonnie:
When it comes to characters, I’m dominant in personality 
You’re a simplistic optimist, parodying without originality 
You spit a Cluster of nonsense that would even confuse Garnet
You’re incomprehensive due to your puerile lisp and accent
You must have catfingers if you think you’ll be the Victor
Make this maniac have a mental breakdown like his creator! 


Steven Universe vs Clarence 2. CartoonMadeRapBattles Season Finale

Official SoundCloud for PowerPoint Rap Battles