<3
released via: https://soundcloud.com/universalchill

featured artist: https://soundcloud.com/hiraethsry

socials:
https://www.instagram.com/deadfishig/

discord.gg/hsUwdAJknJ

lyrics:

There is something that’s inside of me
Screaming at me, tryna go to sleep
Dancing demons under eyelids
Can’t be rational when I’ve been

Awake for a couple of days
You don’t understand my struggles
Don’t pretend that you’re me
You’ve been buying a new necklace
When there’s a noose on my neck
Writing down all of my problems
Like they will go away

There is lots that I’m not proud of
I admit that I have messed up
Something’s causing all this pain
Must’ve slipped up in the past

Please don’t try to cheer me up
Don’t lie to me, I hate that
I’m aware of all my faults
And I’m trying to fix that

And I can’t stop it
Pills been pretty numbing
Been out of my mind
Excuse all my shortcomings

I swear to god it
Ruins all my friendships
I have tried everything now
Somehow I fuck it up, wow

They told me that I’ll end up insane
I think that
To say that it’s a little too late
And I just
Can’t bear the thought of not seeing the day
Where I will feel okay
Buried 6 feet with the pain

I don’t wanna lose you again
I been alone in my bed
Ive had a few dreams about you
But theyre all in my head

Scratching marks on my chest
Engrave ur name in my flesh 
So I can’t forget if I tried to
Ur gonna leave me for dead

I keep fucking up the timing 
U don’t wanna listen
U got feelings of denial
Another pot to piss in
feel like I should start to fight more
I don’t need to be religious baby
U know what I stand for
Ashes burn my eyes sore

anxious I can’t breathe
Im getting nauseous turn the lights out
Please don’t ever speak to me
Don’t act like got time now
Im fighting with myself
Im out of luck is this my karma
I can barely talk im scared of speaking when i call her

6 feet with the pain

6 feet with the pain (feat. hiraeth)

w @xona

produced by sleepwater speedlmt leftquiet and xona

lyrics

i needed some revenge
but i dont wanna vent
can you hear me now
its hurting my head
stop shutting me down
you were half of me wow
but now your not here
i need a way out
u were liquid to me
maybe mixed w some sea
but now she is flying
i wanna retreat
guard my heart
while u stand
from the mill
its feeling far
when u tell me its real
how could i move on when
i dont even want to
ill let this go on
cos i dont know how to
miss you
another song where
i vent bout my issues
waitings long come rip
out my tissues
im so selfish
everyones got traumas
im not speaking can u let me follow her
do i need therapy or pills in my fucking head
my life expectancy
cheers for all this fucking stress

im escaping every night my fucking hed
pls dont aim in
counting on my fucking hed
collecting all my fucking debt
pounding hard right out my chest
guess im sleeping thats a flex
lets skip eating and have sex
what are you eating guess thats bread
what are you doing no no
who are you with now
its how it spread
would u even like me
cant u tell that im trying
oh pls just like me
i swear that im crying

xona
i thought i need to go and let loose of me
but I’m stuck inside where the sun don’t seep
so i just watch along as the days runs deep
and i got my tea in hand so I’m calm for the least
and i don’t know, who i could be
i feel alone, when there’s others around me
i can’t cope, you know it better than me
to let it go but I’m the worst you could be
to go back home
where I could find a home cause I feel alone
falling, dying right here for you

oh i dont wanna talk
im ruined

ruined w/xona

prod hira <3

cleaning his blood with my sword
staring my eyes kinda sore
are you trying to look like a whore
put a guard up shes breaking my wall

she kept calling every number on my phone
texting people there that i dont even know
swear she thinks i care but god i really dont
must be boring when my voice is monotone

keep him pressured, i can do this on my own
shooting arson as it melts between the snow
ill burn his house down, pouring petrol on the road
he cant leave hes getting covered in the smoke

just give it up im getting out of your life
i dont really give a fuck if no ones bothering mine
u said its okay
better dead then alive
said its not my fault
ur heart beats closer to mine
i dont know how to look at you
fighting for my life so baby please just drop the attitude
looking in the mirror
i dont know whats gotten into you
throw myself in water with some concreted tied onto my shoes
i mean nothing else to you

okay,.
die
ok
alone?

travelling at 60 going home
the bottom of the bridge is looking warm
promise me that you wont tell a soul
i gave up everything so you could have it all

she kept calling every number on my phone
texting people there that i dont even know
swear she thinks i care but god i really dont
must be boring when my voice is monotone

keep him pressured, i can do this on my own
shooting arson as it melts between the snow
ill burn his house down, pouring petrol on the road
he cant leave hes getting covered in the smoke

arson

featuring my dawg @homesick

[@sendflowrs:]
whats on ur mind?
whenever u talk
whenever u talk to me
cant help but lie
ur just a jester
laugh and smile at me
jus while i die
n my brain so fucked up
prozac helps me sleep
but i still cry 
whenever a memory comes to me i weep

i think my time is nigh
just let me out to dry
think ill pour another cup
or maybe roll n jus get high
n i been feelin hella fuzzy
u dont love me
need to lie
n i been screamin till my throat is sore
cant even say goodbye

[@homesick:]
say goodbye, goodbye
send me off n shut the lights off
i can't expect you to live with this
no i won't spell it out for you
it's all wrong
i can't try to replace this
but i can keep my distance
let the memories keep me jaded
take what you want, i'm reapin the product
i'm serving sets of the shit i got wrong
n shit i cant talk, what i never wanted            
back to that spot it's so cold there
im a shadow with a blank stare
old coat with that old tear
i got a new spot with some old fears

[@sendflowrs:]
whats on ur mind?
whenever u talk
whenever u talk to me
cant help but lie
ur just a jester
laugh and smile at me
jus while i die
n my brain so fucked up
prozac helps me sleep
but i still cry 
whenever a memory comes to me i weep

i think my time is nigh
just let me out to dry
think ill pour another cup
or maybe roll n jus get high
n i been feelin hella fuzzy
u dont love me
need to lie
n i been screamin till my throat is sore
cant even say goodbye

liar w/ homesick (addyexo)

things i held
im dying to go but she holds me in place i wont run
and when i arrive at heavens gates, will you know me

you think about me ?
cause im dying to know if you still care
held by my feelings 
im holding them bare

caught in a forest and then a landslide got to me
fields of rosesim pissing blood out of my arteries
so i can be with you, im counting leafs
im in a field ive got my head in the trees

i keep hearing voices theyre not coming out
yeah
i keep tryna hide but they keep coming round
tryna build a wall and keep myself out
but you wont recognise me not myself now

give him back to me
take somebody else
give him back to me
take somebody else

dont talk about my problems like you have none
my addiction only spiked because i lost someone
when im next, dont act like you care
treated like a joke you know its not fair

put yourself in my position, wouldnt last a week
and all this time that i have, i do not care to eat
i sorta feel like nobodys aware of me
it sorta feels like, none of you could care for me

take the shit from back and what i wear
take the food from my stomach and strip me bare
take everything that i own
i wouldnt care
and its still never enough and thats not fair

give him back to me
take somebody else

take somebody else

hey, woah
you look so much better than i thought you would
i know i could have helped and i know i should
have been there when you needed me most
so stay close
i just can't bear the thought of you going ghost
on everything we built and the roads we took
doesn't that sound like the best?
'cos i've been staring at a little piece of heaven in your eyes
and i look beyond the arch and see the devil in disguise
and it hurts when you matter the most
and it kills me when you leave me alone
and trust me that i gave it my all
my skin is shed and i'm nothing but bone
you're poison in my veins, my disease
the end of everything we could be
and it's hard
to focus on our wants and i won't
leave you here in my arms 'cos you know
it never got easier
my disarray
leads me here when i need a safe place
i might lead you here into the flames
and right here we'll stay
tongue tied, what can i say
burrowed, i'm hiding away
go without me, save yourself
leave right now, i wish you well
it's been a while since we spoke
but it feels like a week ago
and you forgot what i look like
you won't see even if you try
you won't see me even if you try your best
i can't believe we continue trying again
'cos in the back of my mind i just know we'll end
let's not figure it out, let's just call it dead
i stay alive for a reason
and that reason is you
when my body is bleeding
it bleeds out just for you
Friends (Interlude)
oh she stole my heart
it's all i have
ooh drifting apart
but there ain't no way i'm giving up
it's all my fault
you said yourself
i took too long to answer
you called my your 'makeshift hell'
my patience thin
you told me you wanna stay as friends
i don't know how to take that in
but trust me i'll be alright
it's the same shit but a different day i
woke up in a different place i
don't really remember how i got so damn low
save me all your bullshit lies
i find it hard to push the lines
but ain't that what you wanted love?
ain't this what you needed oh?

you're poison in my veins, my disease [feat. heylog]

blame

Pull me down 
Hold me underwater 
Leave me breathless
Let me drown
Leave my body in the ocean near some wreckage
To be found
When they pull me out you’ll say you never meant it 
I’m unidentifiable 
My body’s been fermented 

It’s all about you 
Love it’s all about you
I hold my head in my hands 
Babe it’s what I’m bound to
Thinking of you
I can’t stop I’ve tried to
I’d let you do most anything, you felt you had to
Treat me however you wanted
Lay down my body, on mountains of rubbish
I broke my arm for you to hold it
Gave you a gun, point it right at your target

Oh it wasn’t worth it all
Watch it fade to black 
I could give my life to you, and still you’d want it back
When there’s nothing left to offer I could split in half
Give you the other part of me, the one I’ve never had

You can devour me, leave me with holes
Eat all my flaws away, rip from bones
Take what you want, just to leave me alone
If it’ll make you love me 

Pull me down 
Hold me underwater 
Leave me breathless
Let me drown
Leave my body in the ocean near some wreckage
To be found
When they pull me out you’ll say you never meant it 
I’m unidentifiable 
My body’s been fermented 

God, I’m restless 
You could take it easy now 
You’ve taken people that I love and you’ve left me with nowt 
So you can take the credit when I go to your house
This is not a joke
Please do not test me now

It must be funny walking round and everybody hates me
And I can’t shake that feeling, it’s how you made me
Is that amusing?
Is that your humour?
I find you stupid
I find you’re useless 
And when I see you
Oh if I ever do
And you compare me
To those infront of you
I’ll make it easy
Oh I’ll decide for you
When you can tell me 
What I was supposed to do

fermented

conversation, we should give it up
i think im struggling to fight you
and theres no need for me to act so tough
id throw my life away to find you
and we can stop, tell me its enough
inflict all the damage you want
you can bruise my bones and be rough
id never tell you to stop

this is the only time i get to hear you
ive wasted all my life, trying to see you
and i dont go outside, cause im ashamed to
id rather stay and hide, its what im bound to

bound

Rise with the Rhymes

stream anywhere :) https://fanlink.to/read-receipts-ft-heylog

written & performed by: @lonesity & @heylog
produced by: @lonesity
engineered by: @camjmusic & @lonesity

lyrics:

[hook: x2]
i understand if you don't wanna be around me
lately i been actin' up a lot, it's unhealthy
a puzzle piece is all i am, searchin' for the right fit
how the fuck i'm finna find somebody if they all dip?

[verse 1:]
nobody wanna hang with me
i get it
i would have to agree
that i'm not perfect
but random people love me
i don't get it
don't know what they see in me
i'm just curious
i'm thinking back on what you said to me
i don't know what i am or what i'm supposed to be
in the end i'll be there when you're close to me
i doubt you'll ever get there, but we'll just wait 'n' see

[hook: x2]
i understand if you don't wanna be around me
lately i been actin' up a lot, it's unhealthy
a puzzle piece is all i am, searchin for the right fit
how the fuck i'm finna find somebody if they all dip?

[verse 2:]
nobody wanna hang with me
i get it
i would have to agree
i'm a lost person
i smile finally
but it don't last for long
99 percent of the day
i wear a frown
i swear to god i don't belong with anyone
'cause they tend to fall out of love
keep that in touch
i swear to god no one
understands me
and i end up pissing me off
it's not healthy

[hook: x2]
i understand if you don't wanna be around me
lately i been actin' up a lot, it's unhealthy
a puzzle piece is all i am, searchin for the right fit
how the fuck i'm finna find somebody if they all dip?

read receipts (ft. heylog)

SPOTIFY / APPLE MUSIC

read receipts (ft. heylog♡)

'Sin-Shi'

Mixing/Mastering - prodbysinxi@gmail.com
Features/Enquiries - sinxi.mgmt@gmail.com

@ditc_exe
@suteracollective