Softheart

softheart

spring 2023 blahhh

Softheart Full

im in my bag of excuses for bad decisions i made  
bad actions stemming from trauma that doesnt justificate  
i look around and see all of this destruction and decay 
but i think the only difference is i didnt see what was right in my face 
at some point you have to face it
used to think fixing my problems was caving
i used to think that my problems were what made me special and that shit is dangerous
and i used to think that if i got better my art would suffer as a trade and
it got to the point where i thought that my mental well being aint even worth saving 
but honestly i was mistaken 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i was down for so long
i dug myself too far 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i made myself the problem 

i was a victim of temptation and my own temperament
i get too passionate i come off batshit and 
im just a magnet for tragic infatuation 
almost had it but i couldnt capture it 
dont wanna trap it  
dont know whats happenin
but when youre laughing
its great distraction 
i think we might just be moving to fast and 
keep your hands in at all times and belts fastened 
i dont know 
what the fuck i was on 
how could i be so wrong 
i was down for so long
i dug myself too far 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i made myself the problem 
and honestly i dont know
what the fuck i was on
how could i be so wrong 
i was down for so long
i dug myself too far 
what the fuck was i on 
how could i be so wrong 
i made myself the problem

my big bag of excuses for this hole I dug myself into

Walking With Fire

I Have So Much Love Inside Of Me To Give

Sunray, the thunderstorm

ｉｆ　ｔｈｅ　ｔｒｕｔｈ　ｗｏｎ＇ｔ　ｓｅｌｌ，　ｋｅｅｐ　ｏｎ　ｂａｒｇａｉｎｉｎｇ

thank you so much for listening.

prod. farber x @jang0x
(additional piano implemented by me)

another day wasted, sitting in my room
i sleep through the dread
i skip through the news
i bet when i wake that nothing is new..
but i can dream, oh can't i?
what's wrong with the sky
it left me behind
now i don't go outside
why won't you ever ask why
the day is faster than the night
(let me go, the night, let me die)

i cannot leave when the ground has been holding me
weep and repeat, cause the cycle has grown on me
you'll brush it off, "oh he's spittin some poetry"
but really i'm trying my best so you'll notice me
i ain't been up on my luck in a minute
it must be my fault that my health has diminished
but i'll fight my way through this shit to the finish
cause i'm all i got, and it's all i was given
i wish they saw what i see on the daily
but i no longer desire a saving
i've learnt a lot, but i still fuck it over (i always fuck it up)
birds feeding out of my chest while i smolder

i watch them fly away
my intestines in their veins
i'm in an empty space
in a stagnant state

this moment's passing me by
but just whose fault is it this time?
with wings made of sludge
blue is more than just the color it's made out to be
what chilled lips to cave into the temptation of frost
if the truth won't sell, keep on bargaining.
having the upper-hand doesn't determine how many fingers it's broken
but you can assume a lot, right?..
RIGHT?
-
another day wasted, sitting in my room
i sleep through the dread
i skip through the news
i bet when i wake that nothing is new..
but i can dream, oh can't i?
what's wrong with the sky
it left me behind
now i don't go outside
why won't you ever ask why
the day is faster than the night
(let me go, the night, let me die)

with wings to fly [prod. farber x jang0]

whats the problem?
prod. @imcaves
hope u enjoy <3

lyrics:
whats the problem
i try not to think ab it in the long run
say it louder to convince myself i’m awful
i see ur face n think i’ll never pass the autumn
ain’t it funny how that works
never knew how much it hurt
put a price atop my head i got a target
thought i need more attention now i’m starving
i knew myself a whole lot less than i regarded
now ur over me w him
i don’t know where to begin

u can tell me that theres more to life
but i just wish we were immortalized
i think im brave until im forced to fly
i’ll never catch up to the morning light

suffer, suture wounds
i crushed my future; tomb
i’d see the sun
if you’d just move a bit
puncture lungs removed
tell me what u do
when night hits
everything is new again

whats the problem
isnt this all that u wanted in the long run?
i could spend my days just waiting for a phone call
but if i did then i wouldnt be someone u want
aint it funny how that works
i’ll just lie down in the dirt
u can bend me how u wanna cuz i like that
i miss how you’d make me hurt i never fight back
i know that it didnt work but yet despite that
i’m a sucker for ur love
i thought it was kinda fun

u can tell me that theres more to life
but i just wish we were immortalized
i think im brave until im forced to fly
i’ll never catch up to the morning light
i'll never

brave bird [caves]

spotify, apple, etc.

produced by caves

it all goes wrong when your with me
you know that, your in two d
you know that, i love you babe, i love you more

it all wraps round my..
she cant calm down
my..
it all ends, ends now
cant help it im a tree in the ground

so selfish what i built for you now
do i exist without my pals
ill bandage ill wear it round
have it we're married in hell

it all wraps round my..
she cant calm down
my..
it all ends, ends now
cant help it im a tree in the ground

IT ALL WRAPS ROUND MY..
SHE CANT CALM DOWN
MY..
IT ALL ENDS, ENDS NOW
CANT HELP IT IM A TREE IN THE GROUND

it all went wrong you know that

married in hell

What did yours say?

main loop used is from a killedmyself drumpack

Its a little late for that don't you think?

please don’t step on my heart 
i’ve been over and over this
many times before 
please don’t get out my car 
the door opens and you leave 
and then we fall apart 

call my bluff, we play cards 
but she always has the ace 
hiding up her sleeve 
i can’t ever recall
not one moment that she ever 
simply smiled at me 

and those cold eyes make me panic
what do you want 
i can’t manage 
and those bright red lips 
make me vanish
what do you want with me 

stop the crying and the shouting, im sorry 
but maybe you’re better off
i’ll stop the crying if u tell me u want me
i’ll do anything no matter the cost

cus the rain my love hasn’t stopped coming
ever since you were the one i lost
i can’t be here without you, im dying
one kiss will finish me off 

please don’t step on my heart (stop the crying and the shouting i’m sorry)
i’ve been over and over this
many times before (but maybe you’re better off)
please don’t get out my car (i’ll stop the crying if u tell me u want me) 
the door opens and you leave 
and then we fall apart (i’ll do anything no matter the cost)

call my bluff, we play cards (cus the rain my love hasn’t stopped coming) 
but she always has the ace 
hiding up her sleeve (ever since you were the one i lost) 
i can’t ever recall (i can’t be here without you, im dying)
not one moment that she ever 
simply smiled at me (one kiss will finish me off)

banshee (wisssery)

FREE DOWNLOAD

heartache

the homie @guccihighwaters

lyrics

(gucci)
I build static
I go crazy
Can't put it out if it doesn't sound amazing
and life's too fast baby hold me till it's over
tell me that you love me maybe once when you're sober
Don't wanna die as a memory
I can't leave without my legacy
Leave love letters lying on my tombstone
death is only physical I'd like to have a new home

Anxiety make my body go numb now
I sleep early withdraw on the comedown 
when I was younger it left me in hunger
but now I'm older 
desire to be under x2

(softheart)
you dont even care like you used to 
you aint even there like you used to be
hard like the usual 
you just give me stares like you're used to me

anxious probably up late
tryna hide my face
tryna bring it back
i was thinking that
life is always moving so fast
before you knew it had passed
doing better still bad

i guess im just scared it wont come
true so i dont think it
i swear its so lonely when its snowing
in new england
thought you called me it was just a 
dream was just a figment
of back when you would hold me 
like the only thing you need is
me 
is me 
is me
hate me you hate me so bad
its over hard to stay sober 
as i get older just grow colder
weed make it okay so i stay stoned
just like a boulder

chorus

anxiety (feat. guccihighwaters)

MUSIC VIDEO:

https://youtu.be/sncR0BS40i0

jealous mess

nothing much

hide the tears

I Will Never Feel Like I Did In 2016

Timeout

It Was Nice Seeing You

I Need To Sleep Better

Put My Things Down

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just happy to be here