softheart

Softheart Full

cycle

BALANCERS EYE

Untitled Playlist

i hate highways (second version) prod. sorrow bringer

Dont Lie

wash my eyes and scrub my dirty skin and decontaminate
hyperventilate, my words ventilate 
this texas sun will char your skin until it wears away 
push the hand away  
push the hand away 

to those going through it right now i know it hurts
dont let that distract you from the fact that you have worth 
fairytales are darker when you peek behind the curtain 
the world out here will hurt you just be careful with your words 

we were never welcome in this world its arms were closed 
 we were never welcome in this world so whats the use
trapped in flesh and bone only leave home in mask and cloak  
and anyone ive told the story has apologized for you 

break me down to my last molecule and make me new
i never had that much connection with this stranger in my room
drag this empty bag of flesh and blood into its tomb 
feed me to the maggots till my carcass is consumed 

wash my eyes and scrub my dirty skin and decontaminate
hyperventilate, my words ventilate 
this texas sun will char your skin until it wears away 
push the hand away  
push the hand away 
(repeat)

decontaminate

fffuck Y3aaah!!!

everyones an asshole 
my plug cuts his coke and my doctor pushes benzos 
my head smacked the floor when i tripped off my board
skating round the halls cause my parents aren't at home
today ive been bored
today i woke up at 4
needed stuff but got too high to drive to the store
at the checkout said "how are you?"
i said "not much"
on my way out i tripped and my thing of eggs crushed

dont be ashamed to be proud of yourself or slow down for a sec 
i say as i quietly critique parts of myself 
i guess i just keep helping so i wont need help
but regardless it helps

can you tell me we're good now?
you left me put down
bad is my good now
when i cry it's a good sound 

(hamilton)
cut it all out
take it all away
i dont wanna feel 
no not today 
numb to the pain numb to it all
hanging by a thread i might fall
i might slip 
lose my grip 
tryna find out where the time went
where it all goes
i dont know
i can only walk the path i chose 
build me up just to break my bones
crushing up drugs on my phone
tryna fix my heart but it got worse
every time i fall in love it hurts
every time i try to not think bout you it dont work
maybe im just meant to be alone with the dirt
but maybe its just meant to be 
i get so high i cant speak
walking round cant feel my feet
when i sleep i grit my teeth
when i sleep youre all i see
so every nights a bad dream 
i dont wanna wake up
just to feel nothing

when i cry it sounds good (with hamilton and sorrow bringer)

all these highs be weary 
they take my friends and bury 
but dont be scared theres much more room inside this cemetery
all these stories cautionary
like take your life compare me 
take the parts you dont like then 
in your life be different than me 
nothing could have prepared me 
none
but i knew the whole time what would happen 
it just hits different when youre really in it heavy 
my skin is slipping off me
just leave me where you find me  
im in the woods trainspotting through the poison ivy 
i left that all behind me
still feel it close beside me 
i dont know what to do with myself when i sit still and silent
i find myself in situations i hope dont get violent 
i trip myself up thinking someones intentions are sideways
ive just been done so badly
you dont know the slightest
all these things that i done seen i keep em in my eyelids 
all this time that ive spent looking youd think that id find it 	  
and i try the millionth i dont know why 
repeat

tombstone carousel (prod. sorrow bringer)

is there anyone home?

lyrics

[mæsk]

i cant listen to to u speak, gone and not coming back
she’s the one that fucked me up 
now she wanna blame her past now
feeling sloshed baby so u wanna talk now
i just needa stop 4 ur pushing me around

i should not
but now she in my arms
the face that look like heaven but behind 
its a ahhhhh
she calls my name like a saint
she fucked me up
but when in arms we can run it back

im running back on my own, dirt shoes
but she right on my neck to pay her dues
she said “i just hate it, i dont wanna make it if im not with you”
know ur on ur own on this one
but i can make it fun
my angel speaks, i wont listen
i think the horns have won

[flesh]
you can say you're sorry all you want know you dont mean it
you just wanted someone you could fuck and share your weed with
never really gave a shit about how i was feeling
im a hollow body to you none of it had meaning

hollow bodies w/ flesh golem (flesh x nihil空)

https://linktr.ee/chrisrain

lyric video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tPIvvAMBfkg&ab_channel=CHRISRAIN


Straight Shooter Publishing (administered by Universal Music Publishing)

SPOTIFY

MY FRIEND

love song 4 the ghost i see in my room sometimes 

original beat by killedmyself (chopped and pitched)
additional violin by my good friend Mohini 

its not somethin else
its exactly whats the most obvious
its so easy to tell
and im no good at hiding it
its rly not that hard to figure out
the obsessions not mutual 
i know u like me but not as much
i wanna be what you think about
i cant help but fall in one sided love 

and im stuck in it  
i get so dumb in it 
there might be something
to make me feel more whole 
somehow 
your touch that feels like home 
but then u cast me off and i end up more alone
strung up
im just a puppet
u can make me dance 
im happy to perform 
in ur bed
im nestled up and warm
hoping 
the night can last more long 

ive been numbed up i dont feel it 
i dont feel the touch im too hollow
can u help me get more human 
maybe some emotions to borrow 
i think im the worlds best escapist 
back then i just didnt wanna exist
so i buried my head in the sand
look at all the time i wasted

. . . . .

when im in your arms it felt so warm like home

linktr.ee/chrisrain

lyric video: https://youtu.be/v9UvNVrnQKg

Straight Shooter Publishing (administered by Universal Music Publishing)

HEEYAH!

....
I sit still in the tall grass
I breathe in as much as I can hold inside my chest
I trust in the sun to beam and lungs to catch my breath
Sometimes it gets hard for me but I still try my best
I'm stuck in the yard right by the broken water fountain
I just saw somebody in the window of that house
I gathered my courage and walked in to check it out
I went to the master bedroom and I looked around
I saw the closet open slightly towards where I was standing
I think I hear someone inside it and it's very scary
I gather all these skeletons up like a cemetery
I swear I didn't wanna lie but it was necessary
I wake up from a bad dream and I go to start the day
I forget about what exactly, just that there was pain
I act like nothing even happened and I'm all okay
I see a new horrible image and I look away
I'm inside the woods way out 
I'm swinging my head, jack-o'-lantern around
October in this ******** town 
Got big leaves lit, I let the rest fall down
And the pines, only thing that survives
Once this winter arrives
And this cold season start up
... ur only sorta right
You make me mortified
And I don't wanna fight
And I'm still someone's daughter
.
.
Like some bands i count the spirits in this monster house
I ain't slowin down im on the highway to hell 
Fuck my opposition smile like I wish you well
I got information that I won't ever tell
I take up to 2 but any more would put me out
I won't face it now, in the morning put me down
Stuck all by myself-

Don't know how it happened, it's a force in this house
Don't know how I keep a forest in this mason jar
I'm so lucky that I told her meet me in the car
Could've turned out so bad, thank god
4 AM in Boston walking with this magic wand
It's cool, you'd think that i was totally cool
With thinking bout bad things 
I'm thinkin bout bad things 
Unwillingly

monster house - Copy

A Love Song

Diggy graves, grim weeper

lucky

Lyrics:

Right back to where we started
When we weren’t broken hearted
Mutilate my fucking body
Killing me is your god damn hobby

Right back where we left off
It’s such a shame
I know I’m to blame
Will you forget my name, or my face
Just another photograph
That you’ll erase, yeah, woah oh

Right back to where we started
When we weren’t broken hearted
Mutilate my fucking body
Killing me is your god damn hobby

But I still try, to be everything you want
Even though, even though you’re fucking gone

These nights are getting longer
But my bones are getting weaker
Put that knife in my back, like you did
I can’t pretend that I’m fine with what you did

Right back to where we started
When we weren’t broken hearted
Mutilate my fucking body
Killing me is your god damn hobby

Take my body out back to a shallow grave
All these souls are fuckin lost they never decay
And ever since that day I’m just not the same
So you rub it in my face as I suffocate

Now I’m breaking down
No I’m not enough, for you
Or anyone at all

mutilate (grayskies)

Monstrous

Monstrous (Prod. BVB)

Listen: https://listen.monstercatmusic.com/fever-9b2b

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Fever

Listen

What So Not & Daktyl - Fever

FREE DOWNLOAD

heartache

the homie @guccihighwaters

lyrics

(gucci)
I build static
I go crazy
Can't put it out if it doesn't sound amazing
and life's too fast baby hold me till it's over
tell me that you love me maybe once when you're sober
Don't wanna die as a memory
I can't leave without my legacy
Leave love letters lying on my tombstone
death is only physical I'd like to have a new home

Anxiety make my body go numb now
I sleep early withdraw on the comedown 
when I was younger it left me in hunger
but now I'm older 
desire to be under x2

(softheart)
you dont even care like you used to 
you aint even there like you used to be
hard like the usual 
you just give me stares like you're used to me

anxious probably up late
tryna hide my face
tryna bring it back
i was thinking that
life is always moving so fast
before you knew it had passed
doing better still bad

i guess im just scared it wont come
true so i dont think it
i swear its so lonely when its snowing
in new england
thought you called me it was just a 
dream was just a figment
of back when you would hold me 
like the only thing you need is
me 
is me 
is me
hate me you hate me so bad
its over hard to stay sober 
as i get older just grow colder
weed make it okay so i stay stoned
just like a boulder

chorus

anxiety (feat. guccihighwaters)

MUSIC VIDEO:

https://youtu.be/sncR0BS40i0

jealous mess

nothing much

hide the tears

Legend

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just happy to be here