produced by branwen

completely non profit

lyrics

turn it up turn it up for another night
getting drunk on a sunday till the morning light
waking up in a monday in a strangers bed
i think i finished all my drinks theyre in my fuckin head

holy shit here i go again
i been off my meds for a while
n im a god again
i dont really know who i am
n im alright with it
at least im being honest
if it hurts then u dont feel regret

ur head will hurt in the morning
u dont give a fuck
shes kinda cute might as well go n try ur luck
she thought that i was 25 holy wtf
so this wont go past tonight idgaf

19 i make connections when in drunk until i break them when im sober
in my heart im older
i bleed from underneath the scotch tape thats holding me together
its forever

why waste my time writing all these fucking metaphors
im still in love with the person that i met before
gave her my heart n she threw it on the fucking floor
i find it hard just to trust cus in the end
fucked my best friend
said she wishing i was dead
u live in my head
both u n him
and its such a mess 
that u have left
that u have left
that u have left

(hero)

i find it funny how we repeat such a cycle here again
shits so toxic its obnoxious she refuse to leave my head
and im okay with that, as okay with being sliced in half
"i got a thing for artists" oh i want ur take on that
chugging octane to experience a numbness when she on me
stop me, id like to see u try oh u could never
sulfate to really rub the cut into my skin
with scotch tape to wrap the fatal wound once again

scotchtape & sulfates ft. hero (branwen)

thanks for the support

twitter.com/1homesickk
www.instagram.com/1homesickk/

prod/guitars by me

endgame
i had a time n place to fall back into the fog
replay, id go back today
wish i never called it off
know im not one to just push it aside
i feel my lowest just steppin outside
brushin the dust off my lungs just to breathe alright
now i gotta take shit just to sleep at night

dim lights on my conscious
i crossed out my past mistakes cuz i just dont wanna process
im aware of all that time takes
i wont keep u guessin ima stay the same

surface tension i been making dents on top of water
im built from components held by PCB and solder
death watcher, keep it close to me
like i could just close the page but i dont bother
hold my head down underwater
to the slaughter
feel my soul levatate out of this shell when i step out
i really feel the distance now
it feels so wrong to stick around
coat on, i dont want a send off
threats artificial i fend off
dig straight down like a check off
bite my tongue, just wanted to just say it i held off

dim lights on my conscious
i crossed out my past mistakes cuz i just dont wanna process
im aware of all that time takes
i wont keep u guessin ima stay the same

replay i standup n pace, its all back to this
i cant concentrate, just hesitate
i pick up the pieces like whats to take
and like whats to say
i keep my mouth shut like what can be done
all a fuckin waste
i dont want a friend cause i have to face
that ive failed the people that stuck to me

dust

@taylor

twitter.com/1homesickk
www.instagram.com/1homesickk/

board it up keep it fortified
i been tryna get my money right
lames talkin bout me i aint hold it tight
social suicide, dont have to hide
worth the price
red vein 5am
mitragyna make me doze off
tapped at 5am
led in my gut, windows frostin
deep in the cut candle droppin
prints in the snow see me walkin
cold i been froze up
reap no reward like whats the hold up
ghost in the door when i pull up
can i convince
jus let me go just let me
double tap chug on my back
leather seats all black
223 n thats a wrap`
dark net grab a pack
soon as i let go it pull me back
take a hint its not that
snow fall down turn to soot
bring me bad news
i live on an empty street cause i have to
bridge my life to the clouds if i had to
make sure its not me that you're attached to
candle wax dried on the desk like some past dues
pushed me out the nest into destitute

red vein 5am
mitragyna make me doze off
tapped at 5am
led in my gut, windows frostin
deep in the cut candle droppin
prints in the snow see me walkin

soot (taylor morgan)

twitter.com/1homesickk
www.instagram.com/1homesickk/

prod by jolst:

@jolst
twitter.com/prodjolst
www.instagram.com/prodjolst/

pitch black like it's nightfall
i guess i'm the type to keep it vague and keep the lights off
rinsed that, now it's all cold
brace now, it's over
i gotta go
if i make it out it's on my own
i planted myself here by my own hand
try to face it all before the snow lands
i don't keep in touch i guess you know that
and daylight never meets me guess i know that
i got all these habits
can't control that
step into the night i got my own back
always like that
it almost feels like someone's here
could you empathize though i'm not near
show face, i don't want to
dont need to explain what i've been through
just go patch it up
swear i tried, turned to dust
i can't mess it up if i never show some love
i give doubt, not trust
sit inside this house and i rust

vague (jolst)

sample by @shaedelea
https://soundcloud.com/shaedelea/leaves-of-our-time

think about it always
couldn't get me through the next day
trash bags full of paper plates
only see me on some holidays
now i'm here but it feels fake
don't want it now i guess i lost the taste
i cant feel resentment for the things that you still don't say
always tell myself that you can't grieve if you don't know me
feels like showin love is so phony
i dont have a friend, a single soul with me
see em always whine bout feelin lonely
ur friends are blowing up ur fuckin phone but you just don't read
u just want some woe is me
how do i invest into my life if i wanna cut it short
couldn't hold that over your head but it's still getting worse
whats to even say on that day, i
don't think that you'd fess that i'm a stranger
i just say it's complicated hiding under layers
thought i got it figured out cause it made sense to me on paper
im a soothsayer, light another taper
still forewarned bout my bones in a crater
ive been here this whole time
don't care to make em notice nah i dont try
i just do this shit n i dont know why
keep myself as visible here as i am in real life
i hold on to shame i keep it close and i don't know why

stranger

all my days are getting darker
and i can't breathe 
i don't amount to nothing 
it's easy to see
all i feel is numbing pain
and anxiety
my heart is just like a drain 
engulfs my fucking feels

dreaming of the top 10 
living in bottom 1 
don't kno if i'll make it
but i gotta trust myself first 
trynna realign with my mind so i convert
what goes on inside all the time into a verse

trynna speak my mind out im
trynna scream my heart out loud 
i could never talk about it
that's why it's such a big problem now 
dealing with it all like i ain't don't have any issues
sipping alc everyday but i say imma stop soon 
can't help myself to stop always feeling so blue 
i wish i felt like all the other colors of the rainbow

all my days are getting darker
and i can't breathe 
i don't amount to nothing 
it's easy to see
all i feel is numbing pain
and anxiety
my heart is just like a drain 
engulfs my fucking feels (2x)

engulfs (smokerose)

and you never know
if the sun goes cold
when the truth unfolds
i'll be there to hold 
you even if ur wrong
i'm staying strong 
but you never know
you never know 
what's coming
next for you

always itching
waiting for 
ur text to come thru

i cannot believe
that there's no pain
in this world

set back 
relax
i can't 

too much
inside
again

gotta
leave
my skin

cuts
relieve
the achin

i thought 
i had a future
but

and you never know
if the sun goes cold
when the truth unfolds
i'll be there to hold 
you even if ur wrong
i'm staying strong 
but you never know
you never know 
what's coming
next for you

and you never know
if the sun goes cold
when the truth unfolds
i'll be there to hold 
you even if ur wrong
i'm staying strong 
but you never know
you never know 
what's coming
next for you

but u never kno (lostcage)

guitar by @jolst
drums by me
mix by me & @lottaheart

lyrics

you gave me confidence
i gave you nothing more than a silent ominous
poisoned flowers
i could stare at you for hours
i'll drop you off your door
my desire never sours
autumn leaves blowing under our hands
as we rest on the grass
looking at the pumpkin patch (ly @onlyfriendyeah)
and i hope that we will last
your the best ive ever had
your the best ive ever had

if im comfy in my coat
you should wear it then
i'll give you anything
i'll give you anything

theres something bout your eyes
i cant help but stare at them
i'll give you anything
i'll give you anything

i promise
it'll be worth it
you deserve it
can you wait for me?

i promise
i'll make it perfect
you deserve it
just hold on tight for me

you gave me confidence
i gave you nothing more than a silent ominous
poisoned flowers
i could stare at you for hours
i'll drop you off your door
my desire never sours
autumn leaves blowing under our hands
as we rest on the grass
looking at the pumpkin patch
and i hope that we will last
your the best ive ever had
your the best ive ever had

every time i see you smile
every time i see you laugh
makes me realise im so lucky
your the best ive ever had
can't believe you want me too?
wtf
did i do?
i did not 
deserve you
your so perfect
bulletproof
bulletproof
every word, every move, every mood
your untouched by the pain that left me bruised
that left me bruised
what would i do
without you?

you gave me confidence
i gave you nothing more than a silent ominous
poisoned flowers
i could stare at you for hours
i'll drop you off your door
my desire never sours
autumn leaves blowing under our hands
as we rest on the grass
looking at the pumpkin patch
and i hope that we will last
your the best ive ever had
your the best ive ever had

pumpkin patch [prod jolst x me]

lyrics:

Get the fuck out 
Light the truck up
This had took away faces
They refer back
Im the top guy
Im in 25 places
Light this blunt up
Drop the match stick
Blow a Hole thru that pavement
Whos the right guy
Whos the right one
No one else want the placement

Im so right now
Im so hay day
Im so I dont care what who say 
Fuck it pour the next deuce
Im counting lines up on a Tuesday
If I text a bitch its link time
All im getting backs a true say
Fuck it never mind the mood change
Im too busy for a mood swing
So Tell me baby u think who changed
I been always on the same thing
This what never going broke bring 
Lotta problems when the phone ring

Light this blunt up
Drop the match stick
Blow a Hole thru that pavement
Whos the right guy
Whos the right one
No one else want the placement

Im in the mix baby im me again
Sorry as fuck
U deep in that drink calling me again im not home
Took me a second to get in this mode
Even my skin tryna turn into to stone
Too many numbers thats not in my phone
Half of the industry hearing my tone
And Baby im back in the city again
Sold out shows in sold out clothes
Baby im back on the grease again
I catch fire and there I go
Whatever I say is wherever they go
Thats my dog he take his bones
I just want this cash in my hand before I land
Before im home

So pick the fuck up
And throw the rest out
I been here for like ages
Its just the break down
This the last one
This when all the shit changes
Light this blunt up
Drop the match stick
Blow a Hole thru that pavement
Whos the right guy
Whos the right one
No one else want the placement

this where everything changes (eric godlow)

lyrics:

Draped in this porch light
Is a broken man 
Stained with his guilt wine red thru his hands
These Words that we know
Halt the truth relayed to him
When everything is lost he picks up to start again

Based on his blood sports
I cannot defend
He just picks the brick back up as he stands
Ive been getting out more
Hell be sure to state
But Fuck if I could tell his rage paved thru his wake
When Every single second counts double on this day
Plan ahead for proper use to minimize ur waste
I cant even feel the copper splatter on my face
Id be none the wiser without profile of this taste
In his bruised hand he holds my back teeth
before the dirts layed he stashes more flesh
On this Wednesday im pushing daises
But On this Thursday im pushing roses 

Draped in this porch light
Is a broken man 
Stained with his guilt wine red thru his hands
These Words that we know
Halt the truth relayed to him
When everything is lost he picks up and goes again

Wait and Watch as his mask drops and his face shows
Its just like a mirror of looking at my own
I swear to god its like the last night I was out alone
Just Listen to my insight and stay the fuck at home
Its Big guns on the green line and a tired soul
U could get marked just like anyone u know
Leave his face on him side ways with a black hole
He just blew his brains out the back his fucking skull
Flayed on the stop sign sits his beating heart
Its like the human body get help break and fall apart
So Back into his hiding hole inside the long dark
He Rests until the year is done and halloween starts

Hlwn25 (eric godlow)

(prod. natebeatz)

witch's tale.

you don't know what its like
to lose your glow before the dawn
to be a child in body
but feel your soul 
move on

i stitched my soul 
with melodies turned pain into art
but the mirror kept asking
"will you ever be the same"

you took my story 
but i took control
you don't know what its like
to lose it all and still rise

my innocence is gone
but i found my light inside
they tried to write my story
but i changed every line

what they took from me that night
I'm taking back this time
every tear i buried deep
became roots in my heart

they broke me down to nothing
but i built myself divine
i built myself divine.

taking back what's mine (natebeatz)

feel free to hmu to collab or talk :)
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21 y/o (444)
11/3/24 🫶🏼❤️
★・・・・・・★
Goth
Music Nerd <3
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