From your hospital bed 
Crying in a cold descend 
X2

The first time 
tellin me its over 
I don’t think I’ll see you 
Grow older 
Just get closer 
When The tears falls fast 
Need a shoulder 

And I promise I won’t run away 
Again 
Trying to write down everything i ever said 
Before they pulled off the stretcher and you left 
Fuck 

Why is god always 

messing with my head  
X2

[operation sounds]

From your hospital bed 
Crying in a cold descend 
X2

The memories 
Hold weight in my heart 
Tethered in one 
each passing day 
reminds me that 
Im close
To ur arms  
Close to ur arms 
Not so far apart 
The memories 
Hold weight in my heart

HOSPITAL BED [PROD. JTPARK]

respite

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Main Artist: lil XipZ
Produced by: Crizzy White
Mixed by: lil XipZ 
Mastered by: lil XipZ
Cover Art by: me being a lazy prick
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
LYRICS:

[Chorus]
i promised myself i wouldnt get attached to you
but since we started talking, ive already made 2 songs for you
i doubt that youll listen but its the thought that counts
you give me something i was missing, i love when youre around
i wish i never had left you first time, if i didnt do that then you prolly be alright

[Verse]
im glad that youre back in my life
took me out the dark n put me in the light
you make my cold heart feel warm inside
like the grinch it grew 2 sizes over night

ill try to be there whenever you need
not gonna fuck up again, well we'll see
i just want someone to be there for me
do you think you could do that for me?

Be there whenever i need
i just want someone to be there for me

[Chorus]
i promised myself i wouldnt get attached to you
but since we started talking, ive already made 2 songs for you
i doubt that youll listen but its the thought that counts
you give me something i was missing, i love when youre around
i wish i never had left you first time, if i didnt do that then you prolly be alright

I Promised Myself I Wouldnt Get Attached To U [Prod. Crizzy White]

-DespairInToAshes-

completely non profit

Mastered by ztope


https://on.soundcloud.com/rgfJXSvvKTWbXqou7

the epilogue w/notahero

prod raspo 
mixed/master by me

Lyrics:

generational trauma
personification of drama
must be easy to say 
“i got it all from my momma”
i’m not a perfect person 
i still take more than i oughta
but you’re not perfect either 
you paint more hate than you gotta 

and i’m sorry that i left you
wasn’t there when i needed to protect you 
when i found out shoulda texted you
cause i knew exactly what it meant for you
that if i stick it out and i try hard
then you might see what’s in my heart
but i see now i wasn’t fair to you
babe i swear that all i did was care for you 

i guess i could find someone to hold me down
oh but i don’t think it’s fair if i’m not gonna be around 
cause my time on this earth is a little more limited than you think it is
and if i showed you inside of me
i wonder what your gut reaction to the trash would be
would you ask what happened to me 
would you stare in a state of shock as you backed away from me

oh see i been in this place before
where i never thought i’d need a hate ward
so when i broke down while i answered 
and then you spread through me like cancer
i sat back in my chair and wondered if i really said it with candor 

i know heart patients don’t hurt like this 
so i just wanna be certain 
you can’t see it from my side now
it’s like you’ve drawn all the curtains 
you want home yea you won’t find it here
i’m done wit all this hurtin

_trauma_ (raspo)

thnk u 4 th_recent support <3

lyrics

its a mess w/ no rest i
cant tell u how im feeling 
we go in circles like one day its gonna pass by
running backwards the back roads are really quite revealing
ive told u b4 jus worded different to last time

u found a space i just hope that u can make it out
i little different for me but i still tell myself
that ur still worth every second that u output on this earth
u jus gotta c it through ik this world causes a lot of hurt

blow a fortune 
she’ll pass on the fortune
but the words u express sound so cordial its torture

u wear this costume
but it aint a costume 
if u wear everyday and act like its correlated on the inside

u found a space i just hope that u can make it out
i little different for me but i still tell myself
that ur still worth every second that u output on this earth
u jus gotta c it through ik this world causes a lot of hurt

i love u i hate u cant u tell that its the same thing
the latter jus for when things dont go planned
but thats the realm that cant always be controlled 
if u see the painting from the lens 

grow old w/ me 
u wanna grow old w/ me 
if theres a story in the works 
u cant go cold on me 

follow me 
cant allow hollowing 
i see the bigger picture and ill do whats best if we can make it out

if we cant make it out the world wont end
ik its hard to believe 4 u but dont send
threats
i try hard to not live w/ regrets
its all locked inside my chest
please give me a little rest now

i c visions now all holy 
she tells me im the 1 & only
the 1 & only u say.. in this universe?
do u think this was written right from fucking birth

ive seen plenty faces and i can tell a curse
i try forget the name coz ion want that person in my life
but its respect its jus that ik myself and when i fret
u say that its all in my head so.. ig its all in my head

grow old w me

grow old w/ me (taylor morgan x jolst)

In my head looking for a friend who looks like heaven sent 
Terrified of losing them 
But can’t go on with keeping them fit

Toxins, that I know are basically ruing your life 
Said that you would stop a couple hundred times 

You’re Dope sick, you ain’t worth it 
I can see it your eyes 
Wasn’t meant to make you cry 

Might dig you a grave I’m being honest 
Went to your parents for help, I’m uninvited 

Toxins fill your head I'm tired 
Recently I been uninspired 

These days the streets fill with violence 
Terrified but so inviting 

Smoke in the air 
I got thoughts in my head about what’s truly there 
Am I supposed to be here??

In my head looking for a friend who looks like heaven sent 
Terrified of losing them 
But can’t go on with keeping them fit

Toxins, that I know are basically ruing your life 
Said that you would stop a couple hundred times 

You’re Dope sick, you ain’t worth it 
I can see it your eyes 
Wasn’t meant to make you cry 

Might dig you a grave I’m being honest 
Went to your parents for help, I’m uninvited 

Toxins fill your head I'm tired 
Recently I been uninspired 

These days the streets fill with violence 
Terrified but so inviting

Dope Sick [+ Cimor]

im sorry i havent healed yet (raspo)

this sucks i miss you (prod. neverforever)

lyrics:

i will stick it out for you
i will stay the night with you
i will steal the life from you
and i will carve your face in my cornea
so i can see you with you with closed eyes

but if my friends they found out what
you say when you get down
well i think i’d cry in their arms
i’d say i love you too hard

ohhh
oh whatever you need from me
i’ll be there for you
i’ll cast aside my feelings so i can please you
i’ll shut my mouth to make sure that i hear you
and i won’t split the blame
oh i’ll never lay claim to any of the things that i do for you
and i’ll add it to my repertoire as i try to farm love from your stale heart
i’ll let my scale form bleed once i try to leave
i’ll showcase wounds abound since your not around me
and do you still think you did nothing wrong
does your pain feel better now i’m gone
can you justify what you did to me
how simple it was for you to take away my breathing
how often you made me feel a tight chest so easily

and i can feel it when your life’s stressed out
so i’ll lay her refrained from sound
(i’ll keep it quiet)
can i ask you to hold me close
run your fingers through my hair
and i won’t ask back from my cardigan
i’m sorry i know it’s gettin hard again

ohhh
oh whatever you need from me
i’ll be there for you
i’ll cast aside my feelings so i can please you
i’ll shut my mouth to make sure that i hear you
and i won’t split the blame
oh i’ll never lay claim to any of the things that i do for you
and i’ll add it to my repertoire as i try to farm love from your stale heart
i’ll let my scale form bleed once i try to leave
i’ll showcase wounds abound since your not around me
and do you still think you did nothing wrong
does your pain feel better now i’m gone
can you justify what you did to me
how simple it was for you to take away my breathing
how often you made me feel a tight chest so easily
and if i gave you, dear another slice of my time
i don’t think i could go back to what i thought i would find

im sorry i havent healed yet (raspo)

getbetter