enjoy!
check out drmabeats!!!

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWWtDH0eoTaT3yUcdT3k7YQ

Lyrics:
I 
Just hitched a ride 
And found my way back into you life 
I’ve 
Been told a million times 
This won’t work out but I still try 
And that I do, it’s too often agin 
I think I’m addictive to you till the end 
This might be a problem or so they say 
Is it true what they claim 
You’re really here to erase 

wait!
If you’re hearing this it’s not to late 
How long was I out? Cause when I opened my eyes
Nothing here looked the same 
You know I’m just like you at time, a little scared of a change 
I don’t feel too safe 
So What happened to our home 
Just answer the question then I’m back on the road 
Does the story end with me making it out 
Or i forever haunt the ruins of this house 

should’ve just packed it all up and just ran when I could 
But I stay for the tragic part, it’s always here the books 
Your the queen and I’m the character that’s overlooked
But it’s your realm, don’t worry I’ll be good 
Until it’s so
And I’m the man here in distress 
I thought 
I’d be cool
But I’m not, I’d doesn’t make any sense 
Cause I really tried my best 
I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you and this mess 

But one wrong step and I’m forever lost 
And I’ll be dammed if I admit you’re the cause 
Well I can’t lie cause the more that I think 
It wouldn’t be so bad,someone blamed that’s not me 
guilty trait in my veins, a Disease 
I’ll watch you hurt and burn and repeat 
Till I’m satisfied and I find my peace  
Then I’ll hitch my ride right back to your feet 

wait!
If you’re hearing this it’s not to late 
How long was I out? Cause when I opened my eyes
Nothing here looked the same 
You know I’m just like you at time, a little scared of a change 
I don’t feel too safe 
So What happened to our home 
Just answer the question then I’m back on the road 
Does the story end with me making it out 
Or i forever haunt the ruins of this house 

For know it’s good bye 
I’d rather watch this all alone 
From the tattered ruins of your thrown 
That we once loved and considered a home

or so they say (prod.drmabeats x mcx)

Pull me down 
Hold me underwater 
Leave me breathless
Let me drown
Leave my body in the ocean near some wreckage
To be found
When they pull me out you’ll say you never meant it 
I’m unidentifiable 
My body’s been fermented 

It’s all about you 
Love it’s all about you
I hold my head in my hands 
Babe it’s what I’m bound to
Thinking of you
I can’t stop I’ve tried to
I’d let you do most anything, you felt you had to
Treat me however you wanted
Lay down my body, on mountains of rubbish
I broke my arm for you to hold it
Gave you a gun, point it right at your target

Oh it wasn’t worth it all
Watch it fade to black 
I could give my life to you, and still you’d want it back
When there’s nothing left to offer I could split in half
Give you the other part of me, the one I’ve never had

You can devour me, leave me with holes
Eat all my flaws away, rip from bones
Take what you want, just to leave me alone
If it’ll make you love me 

Pull me down 
Hold me underwater 
Leave me breathless
Let me drown
Leave my body in the ocean near some wreckage
To be found
When they pull me out you’ll say you never meant it 
I’m unidentifiable 
My body’s been fermented 

God, I’m restless 
You could take it easy now 
You’ve taken people that I love and you’ve left me with nowt 
So you can take the credit when I go to your house
This is not a joke
Please do not test me now

It must be funny walking round and everybody hates me
And I can’t shake that feeling, it’s how you made me
Is that amusing?
Is that your humour?
I find you stupid
I find you’re useless 
And when I see you
Oh if I ever do
And you compare me
To those infront of you
I’ll make it easy
Oh I’ll decide for you
When you can tell me 
What I was supposed to do

fermented

// written and recorded in 2023
and there’s more than a million words 
buried round the corners of my mind but none of them feel right now 
but there i said that i love you first
and i meant every word in every moment, not a lie to be found :/

doesn’t matter what you say 
your words mean nothing to me…
felt it as my heart decayed 
your words mean nothing to me 

i’ll keep walking further with my head down 
feels like my hearts constantly in pain now  
staring at the ceiling till i go numb 
i had all the love to last a lifetime but you threw it all out 

oh
valentine? 

// 2/8/2025 
and i hate the way everything has changed
i’ve got reasons to believe that we will never be the same 
but i don’t know who i am without you 
my heart aches when im here without you   

and i can’t talk about my feelings, im ashamed…
i let you into my life so many times so im to blame :/
and i don’t know who i am without you 
cross my heart i’m dead here without you

and i hate the way that ive grown self-conscious 
you ruined me down to the carcass :(
baby don’t you dare call this love  
i tried again and you let me down…
and i hate the way i wake and you’re not here 
weighs against my brain and it’s not fair 
baby don’t you dare give up now 
wait on you till i’m in the ground

i don't know who i am without you [michael harrison x fxckyeahako]

Thank you for listening:)

Produced by secre https://soundcloud.com/prodsecre

Stream: https://share.amuse.io/JsGMDyYoQwft

Lyrics:

from a place called home
i have lost my attatchment
long way to go
it's a longer way back
and i
don't really seem to mind
have i changed for the worse?
i don't think i'm getting back to
the person you deserve
i'm afraid i've lost track 
of time
that i have spent blind

i don't think i'm doing okay
but i don't have the time or energy in me to face that
instead i tend to run away
find comfort in your face and in your words
and i hate that i
can't seem to go one day
without getting in my own way
i know that i'm the only one to blame
but it's hard to not be able to say that i'm

from a place called home
i have lost my attatchment
long way to go
it's a longer way back
and i
don't really seem to mind
have i changed for the worse?
i don't think i'm getting back to
the person you deserve
i'm afraid i've lost track 
of time
that i have spent blind

i just need a little more
i think i just need a little more time
but i think i've told you that before
think you've heard that lie
i just need a little more
i think i just need a little more time
but i think i've told you that before
think you've heard that lie

from a place called home
i have lost my attatchment
long way to go
it's a longer way back
and i
don't really seem to mind
have i changed for the worse?
i don't think i'm getting back to
the person you deserve
i'm afraid i've lost track 
of time
that i have spent blind

a place called home (secre)

elevator w/ lovematt & junkai

produced by @prod-dash 🖤
mv: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEgzoEH60Cg

harmonies construct of her in vain,
when i had felt the same, i wonder what you let slip loose
idolized in holistic refrain from scaring you away,
but it was you who had left so soon
redundancy falls on the floors of insult,
diffusion of awe is now subtle appall
when the fracturing stops, he returns to his lot
and continues to watch the forgotten responses

how long has it really been?
on everything i could've been your confidence;
wounded deep, but regardless you were gorgeous
external forces couldn't conquer this fortress,
girl i was all in,
now i'm more of like a martian,
a foreign entity ignored and made of sport in pure extortion
the score depends on those who force it,
but on my life i'll never pry into this systematic fortune

easy aches at your name
november stays, but it's may

he's licking tears and steeling bones
from baring sights of burning homes
and of the counterparts still present, most have nearly decomposed
the oxygen persists, but the fluids marching in
wreak havoc on the aspens, now his blood is wearing thin
the centuries forgot receive his aching and distraught,
converting portions of distortion into frequencies bewrought
the ice goes in by division of his temperance
sickly to this weather, but she ain't even my medicine

it's two-forty-two as the film rolls into view
i beg your pardon, i'm enshrouded by the memories construed
just anyone won't do,
the comfort causes calluses he's unable to move
they stare at him in twos

the burial becomes attraction, and of the visitors, it's nothing but distraction
come one and all, before root is sawed, the chainsaw, it stops,
he of wooden rot, with that pandora's box, reverse the plot
the acid sat within his stomach summits to his top
begone of influence it's over 'fore it had begun
i'll never feel that same alikeness, they just read me wrong,
just to do me wrong

bare trees conceive cold leaves,
you showed me what we couldn't be
washing over me, frostridden stings
that sole breeze had spoke "don't leave"

easy aches at your name
november stays, but it's may

the paneling glows a familiar sequence,
but it's passage won't open to those who would seek it
through timing and tamper he had managed to enter
unaware of it's contents, he treads a bit deeper
in awe of the contrast from seeker to aether
he's welcomed to stay, but he's covered in shivers
for those it abducts are reduced down to neither
so backwards he goes, where his soul doesn't meet her's

come the night i'm allotted what's divine
i got bugs up in my head,
they always scratching, leaving bites
ain't no energy to waste on those unkind
only time you talkin shit is when you're doing it online

november (dash)

hope u enjoy
prod me:)

stream: https://open.spotify.com/track/4d5T99Alz4yjtsK4rXZQMG?si=0ac39b124ca245e9

lyrics:

follow me out of my mind
if something so simple as passage of time
could rescind the blunders i've made in denial
i'd wait here forever to make things alright
i'm sure that you've noticed erosion in me to my core
how the hell am i sposed to be happy ignored?
guess i'm hoping that most weeks i'll end up at yours
poke my head in the door some more

because it's you that i bleed for
i like to think it means more
i never like to keep score
so tell me if you need more

because it's you that i scream for
it's you i feel diseased for
it's you i threw the key towards
got just what i wanted
yeah i got just what i wanted but
it's you that i scream for

hollowing inside and out
i guess nothing good is meant to stick around
i read what you said now i'm down
can't tell if i'm dead or my head's in the ground
knowing you can see me now is all that really keeps me honest
i've been retreating from the me i think you always wanted
i've been defeated and i think i need a recourse
i could be your resource

because it's you that i bleed for
i like to think it means more
i never like to keep score
so tell me if you need more

because it's you that i scream for
it's you i feel diseased for
it's you i threw the key towards
got just what i wanted
yeah i got just what i wanted but
it's you that i scream for

scream

prod. acey

stalkin me baby ill leave by the morning
you make me scared thers no point in ignoring
you every night, and leaving you afraid
i know that you never wanted it this way
talk to me

ill show you what you mean to me my darling
ill be honest
hold me in your arms

just please
call me back
ill be there
even if you needed some fresh air ill drive to you

ill be there in a second, dont you worry
i know youre hurting

my soul is on your body
my mind is yours, my heart is
attached to you my darling
my life is yours dont worry
oh i love you

happy as can, but girl youre hurting
youre strong i notice

im proud of you my darling
although i cry a lot its just cause i adore you
cant live without you

Oh Lord Jesus
help me and my precious
i trust in you i mean it
my love for her is seamless

just please
call me back
ill be there
even if you needed some fresh air ill drive to you

ill be there in a second, dont you worry
i know youre hurting

call me back

a forest reprieve from the withering eve of a sun
(like, can i go? are we done here?)
he walks on his teeth and he talks through depictions of scars
(they say you never know what you don't hear)
that fostered relief at the cost of neglection of star
(longevity's enclosed until the soul gears)
he's cosmically sore but apprentice of tethering hearts
(my body's been remote, but i'm all ears)

crush two and i'm in it, he's waking bruised and deflated,
i got this habit of spitting, but all this acid come with it
he's turnt to ash every minute, a song and dance resurrection
you rabbits ripping up carrots, i'm canis lupis incarnate
got sonic booms when i'm barking, converting rooves into starships
this ain't your average invention, it's more than natural selection

thought she was safe up in his head
so he'd removed the padding covering his weakened flesh
but abrupt departure cut the flora thriving on his skin
now cattle's grazing on the flowers bursting through his chest

the green evades from being subject to an open wind
in apprehension of it's fate awaiting overhead
so nature waits in subtle breaks between the pavement
for many moons are to elude at compensation, but still, he's anxious

uncertainty enveloped through subtly of enthrall
but i regulate that haze through a blizzard of getting gone
with remedies for those emmitting vacancy of want
disheartened, hurt, and starving, yet crucial to it all
cast within a marshland, enhardened, enswamped
in emergance of that influence, the arteries are clogged
but the potency that comes with it is rightful in it's wrongs
as doubt within neglect to beauty's sewn within the flaws

so what's the word? you know i'm down for it
as mother earth determines counterfeit
the now dispersed yearns inhabitance
of bird and fern, the worm is blurred

might be universe impairing peers with lightning
a white screen thrown about, a crown ensures the stifling
so often i'm haunted and falter from nonsense,
the world's still revolving, he's not what she wanted
if you were just honest, it'd lessen the starving
this trail led of crumb that you thumb's disembarking
he's all but undone, but is stunned from the heartless
injected was rust, muck, and lust in her harvest

always unheard, speaking my word, they just wanna flirt
better or worse, embracing the curse 'till covered in dirt
wrapping in silk, given the earth, i know it'll hurt
off of the pills, downing that cardi, merlot, for the heal, yea

a forest reprieve from the withering eve of a sun
(like, can i go? are we done here?)
he walks on his teeth and he talks through depictions of scars
(they say you never know what you don't hear)
that fostered relief at the cost of neglection of star
(longevity's enclosed until the soul gears)
he's cosmically sore but apprentice of tethering hearts
my body's been remote, but i'm all ears

bird and fern (dash)

prod by icantsleeplol & hvci
mixed and mastered by icantsleeplol & hvci

thank u @hvci for helping me with some of the layers to help my vocals more impactful ♡ 

and ofc w/ @xav0id

(i’m experimenting with my vocals and my voice in general to see what it’s capable of. i don’t wanna be limited to one genre. i wanna push past my comfort zone and explore different sounds with my voice)

enjoy:)

lyrics:

@icantsleeplol -
they asked me to smile
so i did
now i can’t tell when i actually mean it

i learned to read the room too well
picked up their moods, and forgot myself
said the lines they’d rather hear
kept my truth in second gear

they liked me better watered down
so i kept my head and voice low-bound
never asked them what they meant
just played the part and paid the rent

@icantsleeplol w/ @hvci -
they never wanted all of me
just the version they could keep clean
so i edited my every thought
to fit inside the mold they bought

@icantsleeplol -
empty tent, the lights still burn
but no one waits for my return
they loved the laugh, not the cost
they clapped so loud, i got lost

@icantsleeplol w/ @hvci -
empty tent, applause fades quick
left alone with what won't fix
i give and give, then disappear
while no one even shifts their ear

@icantsleeplol -
i swallowed pride and played polite
convinced myself it felt alright
but every nod, every demand
left another thing i couldn't stand

i tried to slow the spinning down
but silence just became more loud
i gave too much and asked too little
and broke apart right down the middle

@icantsleeplol w/ @hvci
they smiled, so i assumed it worked
but underneath, it always hurt
and though i tried to keep it smooth
the pressure cracked the parts i moved
 
@xav0id -
empty tent, still looks the same
but i don’t walk out how i came
they called it charm, called it grace
but missed the tremble in my face

empty tent, the echo's mean
i’m still stuck on what they’ve seen
if this was love, or just a guess
why did i fall apart to impress?

@icantsleeplol w/ @xav0id
i’ve memorized what pleases them
but not what brings me back again
i dance around their fragile moods
and call it kindness as i lose

they say i’m calm, they say i’m nice
but only when i pay the price
and every time i try to breathe
i wonder what they’d let me keep

@xav0id - 
empty tent, lights flicker slow
no one left to tell me “go”
but i still bow, still play it cool
still scared of not fitting the rule

empty tent, just me and air
i gave too much, and no one cared
the quiet hits a little late...
but louder than the love they faked

i’m still here
they just forgot
and that’s the part
that hurts the most

empty tent w/ xav0id & hvci

Bleeding Ink

i'm stuck in the past but you don't have to be

@ninenineteencollective

dm or email me for fts, mixes, whatever :)

Email: yokaidreams30@gmail.com

scream

Yokai Dreams