my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

stream everywhere!

dearly departing [jolst]

the second single off my upcoming album 'dearly departing' coming out on 9/9
featuring @betweentheveinsandi
produced by @jolst
art by @/ashleydhe on instagram
hope u enjoy <3

lyrics:
its finite, reactive bullshit
that got us here
and i dont mean to laugh or joke
but i see it clearly how
time takes lives in the cruelest way
and im fucking exhausted
so i wont pray for calmer waves
im better off in a coffin 

or when its half mast
think about what i’ve passed
will i be forgiven?

or when im undone
will i run
or is this a new beginning?

i think i saw your star sign
projected in the night sky
i look out to the ocean
and then im back to your eyes

veins:
I don't give a fuck anymore
I would let her drown me in a low tide
these decisions assault my eyes
I brace for the waves that drag me back into the deep tide

yuh,
it gives a deep high
I guess it feel right
underwater with no sunshine
I heave a deep sigh
I'm filled with sea brine
all of my bones will rest in deep lime

but it's been nice
I hope u feel right
I hope he never leaves ur fucking side
I pray u both live long and happy lives
most of all, importantly, I hope u feel alive

its finite, reactive bullshit
that got us here
and i dont mean to laugh or joke
but i see it clearly how
time takes lives in the cruelest way
and im fucking exhausted
so i wont pray for calmer waves
im better off in a coffin

dearly departing

low tide (ft. betweentheveinsandi) [jolst]

spotify & apple music!

IV. low tide (ft. betweentheveinsandi) [jolst]

i can make something out of everything i see...
prod. @jolst & @sainttomorrow
art by @/ashleydhe on instagram
love u all, album next week
from the bottom of my heart, i hope u enjoy <3

lyrics:
i need help
could u lend me a hand?
cuz the foam on the waves
just threw me into the sand

i need time more than anything
i can make something out of everything i see
but i just want to breathe for once
i don’t think thats asking much

to take, to give, to love
living is hard enough
im so used to the brace before the impact
that when i sleep i just wake before the contact

and now i wander
and i wonder
if its over, dead and gone
if my memory takes too long
are u someone i can rely on?

i need time more than anything
i can make something out of everything i see
but i just want to breathe for once
i don’t think thats asking much

i think i waited too long 
i know the damage is done
im moving mountains just to solve
all of the problems i’ve caused
i’d rather take it all in
than try to fix what i broke
cuz every time i step a foot in
i just slip and then choke
i think im losing whats in front of me
and whats in front of me
is the ocean and some company
but what is company
when im all alone
i’ll try to cope 
but i dont wanna know
what’s really gone now

the weight is heavy on me
and i’ve been falling backwards
i cant stay steady i just
pray for better days when i think i need you
more than i’d admit
i wanna cry and fucking quit
my stomach pulls and shakes and twists
take me back to those i miss

i need time more than anything
i can make something out of everything i see
but i just want to breathe for once
i don’t think thats asking much

VII. mountain mover [jolst x saint tomorrow]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

in the wasteland we carry on
sold a story for way too long
may our curses and blessings bond
for its over before its gone
at a time
its one
at a time
by design
we fail
by design

im losing my mind
im losing my mind

tell me what its worth to u
the lives and bridges burned
the courage of the hurt
the hate your children learn
would you rescue me?
would you send me a signal?
or rest my pleas
like the hearse of a victim?

i understand u had it ur way far too long
well the truth is i never open to anyone
and the reason i dont talk is not my fault
my brain is busy with self sabotage

im screaming the words for you
im bleeding so cut me loose
my ceiling is worn
the patterns are torn
my patience is wearing thin
u couldn’t be sure
i can’t give u more
is this what its like to end?

tell me what its worth to u
the lives and bridges burned
the courage of the hurt
the hate your children learn
would you rescue me?
would you send me a signal?
or rest my pleas
like the hearse of a victim?

XI. rescue [jolst x decks]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
time won’t fly
it’s like i struck a nerve
i spoke to the sky
he said i’ll never learn
i’ve clawed through the sand
just to dig my own grave
though heartache’s my villain
i take the cake

the song i sing
the trees sing back to me

cuz i entered the forest
and it chewed me up and spit me out
“you’ll never win, i have no doubt”
i kept my promise
but i suffer when i speak aloud
will i ever find a way to slow time down?

X. dearly departing [jolst]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
say less
“check between the timber and pine
hard rain and wait for sunshine”
it never waits for those who survive
so i’ll wait for days to find

anything i could possibly eat
i climb rock walls just to finally take a seat
and im done waiting for change
(waiting for change)

maybe things aint as bad as they seem
i always hated being special now im lost at sea
so now im done waiting for change
(done waiting for change)

the crescent moon is a hug
i needed help more than ever,
i was met with a bug
the gather never was an option
it was death from above
and the hunt was met with hate
i’d never suffer for love

the vultures above
watch em picking their poison
i hope im enough
to be strictly avoided
the sky’s turning red
i take that as a reason
for filling my home
with a bundle of leaves

just to stay warm
i need to stay warm tonight

gather round lemme tell u a story
listen or you’ll be bored till the morning light
i feel better when given a warning
so cover your ears if u cant handle mourning life

tell me what i could possibly eat
i lost my mind a year ago when i was finding retreat
so im done waiting for change
(waiting for change)

maybe things aint as bad as they seem
i always hated being special now im lost at sea
so now im done waiting for change
(done waiting for change)

IX. the long way home [jolst x irby]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
if this is real i’ve learned my lesson
i’d bring a chair to watch myself trying to breathe
when every day is just progression
its easy just to stop and stare at what u need
and every time i turn around
my vision’s upside down
and the mirror’s staring back at me
now i’m waiting for a sound
cuz my ears are bleeding out
isnt it nice to be so happy?

all the time spent makes me sick
i’ve been down, wheres a stroke of good fortune
while my life has been at risk
where were you, did you even come searching?
while the nightmares subsided 
my bones and my heart are on terms with the devil
clear i have been misguided
the water just dragged me right back where i came from

paint it on black
put out a message
i dont think that ima regret this
on top of the world for a second
then i slip and im back at the entrance
look at the way that i fuck up
must have been somethin within me
had to be something im hiding
look at the facts we’re presenting
like, he doesnt talk
he doesnt socialize what is his problem
clearly its all in head though
what if its something thats mental
i cant breathe when its all building i need time and cover
out of air i think im drowning, am i going under?

all the time spent makes me sick
i’ve been down, wheres a stroke of good fortune
while my life has been at risk
where were you, did you even come searching?
while the nightmares subsided 
my bones and my heart are on terms with the devil
clear i have been misguided
the water just dragged me right back where i came from

VI. pay your respects [jolst x irby]

reflection (interlude) [jolst]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
i shouldn’t have woken up
(i lost souls of people i trusted most)
we couldn’t have fucked this up
(the waves told of more than i’ll ever know)

the sail strikes back
and the mast’s in half
now the ships all cracked
never coming back

lower deck, where i slept, shouldve seen it comin
i was blessed with a soul now im left with nothing
cuz i couldn’t find a way out
the floor burst as i was screaming for help

and now i live with my failure
im burdened with loss
was i meant to be saved or
is this just what i’ve earned
cuz god knows i never learn

so teach me
if this is my lesson then come fucking teach me
im suffering out here alone where nobody can reach me

i shouldn’t have woken up
(i lost souls of people i trusted most)
we couldn’t have fucked this up
(the waves told of more than i’ll ever know)

the sail strikes back
and the mast’s in half
now the ships all cracked
never coming back
when the sail strikes back
we relive our past
feel our burdens cast
never coming back

III. the sail strikes back [jolst x taylor morgan]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
it feels like im drowning
i wake up im bruised and battered
i finally stop spinning
and the ocean goes on forever and ever

what we have isn’t perfect, but fuck it we’re trying
i struggle with certainty, and the truth is im lying
my heart is a mess inside
but i know im fine enough

im seasick
took my heart, i didnt know that i needed it
fall apart, the very second we’re leavin and then
i wasn’t smart, couldn’t even bear to see the ship go
underrrr
the very second we had
sundereddd

and thats the last time i fall apart to save myself 
our story passed time, written like a book up on the shelf
and i swear im always
fucking up
nowhere to run

everything is 
uncomfortable
its never fun

and i wonder why
im staying up
to see the sun

maybe i should just go to bed

[cherry]
i’m stuck underwater 
and i just cannot find the space to breathe 
its hotter and hotter 
i sweat through my collar when ur with me 
took it all in i just sat back 
i don’t wanna fall don’t wanna backtrack u saw my heart and u cracked that
i saw ur heart and its matte black 
i saw ur heart 
u know its not perfect 
but fuck it were trying 
so lets get something working

II. seasick (ft. cherryrizla) [jolst x lavendertxwn]

my second full length album, dearly departing

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
artwork by @/ashleydhe on instagram

featuring:
@cherryrizla
@betweentheveinsandi
@ejcarrmusic

additional production by:
@irby314
@user-757072975
@taylor
@sainttomorrow
@pekarot_161

thank you all for everything. i hope you enjoy <3

lyrics:
she had her life in a picture frame
had her future signed away
he had managed to escape a mess
a year with none to blame

take me away from my innocence
i could only dream that we were kids again
once i had fallen i had never left
it was u that once had told me what the sigil meant
now the journey begins
hundreds of souls never to speak again
i could be different but pride is a sin
u couldn’t manage urself let alone a
trip to burden many like yourself
disregard to hundreds and their health
all in search of feelings never felt
you were so selfish u didn’t deserve it

and now the memories come flooding back to me
like a ship at sea we capsized, never recovered the bodies
we went down burning (in a ball of fire)
draw back the curtains (in her funeral attire)

and i can’t wait to find you out
as life goes by i feel my time run out
hey i wouldnt be surprised if you hate me
i been struggling alone on the daily
i know im a lot to handle baby
tell me if you need to breathe, i’ll be waiting

I. eulogy for a funeral [jolst x irby]

hope u like it

piano cover:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=27U0oAREUA4

navy blue - tssf cover

drawn 2 u (flesh)

prod caves
original by sendflowrs

click click
light up the cannon
smoke till this pain stop
or i kick the can and
this blunt heal my wounds
my new shoes from japan
and, don’t think of her
anymore, i can’t stand it

i know where you’ve been
know where you set off
i know where you get on the bus
and you get off
she say that i’m crazy
she don’t know the half of it
my vision blurry
i don’t know what’s happening

she took my hands
into hers
told me “everything will be okay
just stay right there”
i got two cuts
on my face
she looks scared
but i promise i would never hurt you
baby i swear …

you thought you got away,
i’m afraid it’s bad luck
you just wanna drink alone
and chill inside the bathtub
already know she keep a key under the mat, tucked
hope that you didn’t think that you would get away with that, love ..
6 months have passed
since we were matched up
thought that you could play me,
block my number and get gassed up
now i’m climbing up your stairs and i’ve got bad blood
wonder if you’ll recognise my face under this mask, love

she saw me in the mirror, frozen.
“don’t try to run baby it’s over
i wrote you everyday for months”
i was crying as i told her
“now i gotta do something i hate, girl yeah you know i cant control it”
she tried to scream and shut the door,
but back in pinewood, soul was stolen

“i’ll call the cops” i said “what for”
i just want a conversation, open up the door
i see your heart drop on the floor
if i can’t have you no one can, i couldn’t ask for more

click click
light up the cannon
smoke till this pain stop
or i kick the can and
this blunt heal my wounds
my new shoes from japan
and, don’t think of her
anymore, i can’t stand it

bad luck (sendflowrs cover)

this song ok @xelfiy

lyrics

ok ok 
no way
since i been outta town heard that she been seeing new faces
new places, thrown around th city like she food waste
blue waves been drowning out  the city with her cruel taste
 
ok ok
creeping out at night
keep it on the lo-fi
but lil does she know that ive 
keeping out an eye
now packing up my shit but she be stepping on my suitcase

fuck now she showing regret using force 
don’t wanna deal wit this anymore
asked me u were going, will u be back in the morning 
dont worry girl its not that important

no i not bothered by these scenes
control what i can control is what i mean
i dont need to tell u bout the places that ive seen
in the end who’s gon be left yeah so ima just do me

yeah yeah yeah yeah
i dont need em coming round
ive been living in the moment now
i might need another hit so i can fucking  slow it
soak it in, take another hit before i fucking drown

ok ok 
no way
since i been outta town heard that she been seeing new faces
new places, thrown around th city like she food waste
blue waves been drowning out  the city with her cruel taste

ill find xelfiys lyrics when some1 bugs me

okokokokokok

okokokokokok2/ft_xelfiy #060122 (prod gochii)

with the life i’m given, i’m healing.

@lovelessgroup
@butaneband

IX. the long way home [jolst x irby]

decks

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