forthelastyear(ural x caps ctrl)

(chorus)

looking for a light at the end of a tunnel
you don’t know what it’s like to actually really struggle
where every night i spend alive
i dream about suicide
don’t talk to me i know i’m not fine
staring at the ceiling just to pass the time
i just hope that we can rewind
but i know i’ll never call you mine

(cutdeep verse)

(i’ll never call you mine, yeah, i’ll never call you mine)
looking for the light but i never saw the sign
reach out just to waste my time
i can’t sleep you’re killing me slowly
why the fuck am i so lonely

(bridge)

with my wrist open wide i’ve got nothing left to hide, well at least i tried

(chorus)

looking for a light at the end of a tunnel
you don’t know what it’s like to actually really struggle
where every night i spend alive
i dream about suicide
don’t talk to me i know i’m not fine
staring at the ceiling just to pass the time
i just hope that we can rewind
but i know i’ll never call you mine

(epitome verse)

i know that i’m probably better off dead
every word i life unsaid 
will come haunt me in the end
now i’m stuck in my head
thinkin about all the tears i’ve shed
all the blood i’ve bled
you said “you’re not enough for me”
don’t you know your words cutdeep

(chorus)

looking for a light at the end of a tunnel
you don’t know what it’s like to actually really struggle
where every night i spend alive
i dream about suicide
don’t talk to me i know i’m not fine
staring at the ceiling just to pass the time
i just hope that we can rewind
but i know i’ll never call you mine

out everywhere :)

my unspoken words haunt me at night w/ cutdeep (smokerose)

(chorus)
and i keep running away from my problems
i don’t know how to solve them
you care a little less when you hit rock bottom
cloudy eyes with a tortured mind
i can see the lies as the light grows darker
it fades from white as the blade sinks deeper
i thought blood ran thicker than water
my soul has died fuckin leave me behind

(verse) 
i thought you cared about my feelings
every night i’ve been screaming
questioning what’s life’s meaning 
what i’ve been believing 
holding on to every little thing that ever mattered
you know that my hearts been shattered
sayin that the medicine will always make me better
but every single day i always get sadder
when will i be okay
when every day feels like the fucking same
i’m holding on to all these memories 
but still i question why things won’t change

(bridge)
everyday feels like the same thing 
and i’m fucking don’t with it (i’ve had enough)
when will i 
be set free
from this life

(chorus)
and i keep running away from my problems
i don’t know how to solve them
you care a little less when you hit rock bottom
cloudy eyes with a tortured mind
i can see the lies as the light grows darker
it fades from white as the blade sinks deeper
i thought blood ran thicker than water
my soul has died fuckin leave me behind

(chorus)
and i keep running away from my problems
i don’t know how to solve them
you care a little less when you hit rock bottom
cloudy eyes with a tortured mind
i can see the lies as the light grows darker
it fades from white as the blade sinks deeper
i thought blood ran thicker than water
my soul has died fuckin leave me behind

blood doesn't run thicker than water (discent)

INTRO:
promise you won’t forget me
i’ve been feeling so empty
is this the end of tonight
am i saying goodbye 
for the very last time
i don’t want to rewind
i can’t go on living this lie

CHORUS:
oh where did the time go?
you said you’d be back tomorrow
i took your lead i followed (followed)
straight back to my sorrows (sorrows)
so i’ll ask you again where did the time go (where did it go)

POST CHORUS:
you left me here defenseless
i’ve never 
been so fuckin helpless
whatever
you gotta be so desperate 
to even turn to me for pleasure

SENDFLOWRS VERSE:
for pleasure i can’t lie i’m fucked 
droolin from my mouth like everytime we talk
you always told me i can look but i can’t touch
wait that’s the weed man i think i’m finally done
erase my name from your phone
you better
tell him straight and never come home
i’m gonna
tear his flesh from the bone
and i might 
catch a case you made me so cold (so cold)
you fake bitches
i’m a sinner
i stay sinning 
i dream of you but i’m not the one you’re kissing
like baby come over here lemme show you what you missing

OUTRO:
see my head spin
round and round
i just wanna get out of this town
look at my face and you’ll see a frown
but don’t be surprised 
when you see my wounds are open wide
don’t cry tonight
with your ocean blue eyes

spotify!

where did the time go ft. sendflowrs (wisssery x jolst)

(intro)
i struggle deep down with my sorrow
at this point i’ll be gone by tomorrow
the world has left me cold and broken hollow
if you see me disappear don’t follow

(chorus)

i struggle deep down with my sorrow
at this point i’ll be gone by tomorrow
the world has left me cold and broken hollow
if you see me disappear don’t follow
i’ve been broken before but this feels different 
did you make it your mission
to make me question my existence 

(post chorus)
my existence 
i can’t deal with it 
but still i get 

(paperthinwalls)
o-o-o-over it￼
i’m over this
bleeding on the ground think i’m done with it all
and i can hear them talking through my walls
you’ll never see it coming i’ll haunt these halls
e-e-e-e-every night i fall back in time
i know i can’t rewind this tragic hopeless life 
(the things you said)
the things you said to me i hope you take ‘em back
you scream and lie to me about things i never said
things i never did can you leave it in the past 
i never seem to make these feelings last 

(pre chorus)
(the things you said to me i hope you take ‘em back
you scream and lie to me about things i never said
things i never did can you leave it in the past 
i never seem to make these feelings last)

(chorus) 

i struggle deep down with my sorrow
at this point i’ll be gone by tomorrow
the world has left me cold and broken hollow
if you see me disappear don’t follow
i’ve been broken before but this feels different 
you made it your mission
to make me end my existence

ill be gone by tomorrow w/ paperthinwalls (metlast)

(chorus 1)
well
it seems i might die
i don’t know why
i’ve been questioning my worth
screaming at the sky
just put me in the dirt
where i belong
i have no one

(post-chorus 1)

you cant hear my heart breaking in silence
why do you offer me nothing but violence
and you’re a liar i see through your defiance
in this disaster you still face me with deniance

(verse 1)

n-n-now i look into your eyes and it breaks me down
knowing that my life’s turned upside down
y-y-y-your gravity
is pulling me
i’m overthinking 
this reality

(bridge)

has pulled me to my knees
it’s making my heart bleed
oh why cant they see
what it’s doing to me
there’s a hole in my heart

(verse 2)

i should’ve seen this coming from the start
when i saw your hand reach to tear the soul apart
l-l-looking back i was hiding in the dark
b-b-b-b-broken shards from the mirror that reflect the past
why do i keep crawling back to you
something that i shouldn’t get use to
those deceitful eyes
they terrorized they terrorize 

(chorus 2)

it seems i might die
i don’t know why
i’ve been questioning my worth
should i leave it all behind 
just put me in the dirt
where i belong
i have no one

(post-chorus 2)

i’ve said this before now deaths offering me silence 
the peace of mind i’ve never found in life’s guidance

spotify <3

i have no one (metlast x 5head)

EPITOME:

holding on to my chest
i’m barley breathing
cant get you out of my head
now on the floor i lay bleeding
your eyes were deceiving 

i’ll crawl until there’s nothing left of me
oh cant you set me free
from this sick life i lead
disgusted with how i look
can i even wake up from this
never ending nightmare
might as well just die here
if i’m just gonna lie here

might as well you might as well
leave me in this hell

EMPTY:

ion take care of myself
i got blood on my fuckin pants
barely eat right 
procrastinate the goddamn advance
in body process 
cause it makes me mad
cus it makes me mad
and it makes me sad

i got 10 grand inside my fuckin duffel bag 
i got 10 g pure diamonds but im empty n thats a fact
"i got, i got, i got, i got, i got,"
what you got?
doing all this talking shit but bitch aint barked but once, like

you're fake
im bait
what did u say
what did i say
i mustve said something wrong cus nothin rly ever lasted
every single time that we was otp u was blasted
i just fucking miss u man who the fuck r u now
i just need protection or else im heading 4 the ground

no matter how hard i try i’ll never be enough w/ emptychest (fijin)

VERSE 1

(epitome)

i solidify the thoughts inside my head
the thoughts that are telling me i’m better off dead
no matter what you say to me
6 feet deep is where i’ll be
as the light from the tunnel grows darker and darker
my mind grows farther and farther away
please stay
stay with me
don’t leave my body alone to decay

VERSE 2

(paperthinwalls)

this is the last time i hope you see me 
(hope you see me)
6 feet underneath i’m not breathing 
it’s too late to go back
i cant run to the past
you left me shattered like glass
knew this would never last
it doesn’t matter i’ll be dead in the morning
body lined with chalk yeah i’m never returning 
i’m writing all these songs yeah this is my warning 
never had a place yeah this doesn’t concern me
oh oh oh
i’m burning it’s ok
i’m learning (i’m learning)
i’m so alone
got nobody i feel like a ghost

BRIDGE

(epitome)

i’m so alone 
i’m so close
to letting go
of the life i use to know

VERSE 3 (shared)

(epitome)

p-p-p-pain is never ending 
i cant find the beginning
my minds at war
don’t know what i’m searching for
a sense of hope maybe?
but i can’t find that lately (lately)

(paperthinwalls)

and lately i’ve been lost in this dream
and no hope of ever escaping
and oh god yeah look what you made me
i’m sorry it’s these feelings that change me

OUTRO

(epitome)

i’m so sorry
please for give me
i cant change
i know i’ll stay the same

longing for death w/ paperthinwalls (metlast x luffy)

EPITOME:

i-i-i-i-i try to forget the past 
but it just keep bringing me back
n-n-n-no we didn’t  know how this would last
is it funny to you to see my life shatter like glass
t-t-t-the world around me left me broken and scarred
don’t be surprised when i’m dead in the dark
these lonely feelings that i can’t shake

oh god
when will i break

(epitome & casperrr)

all of these feelings 
what is the meaning
i struggle every day to keep on living and breathing 
at this point i’ll be dead hanging from the ceiling 

i’ve been so alone
got no where to go
not even a home
walking down this lonely road
no hands to hold
i’m really on my own
it haunts me to know 
that i can’t let 

c-c-cant let
GO
of the past

it haunts me to know 
it haunts me to know

CASPERRR:

u keep haunting me in my sleep
n u keep haunting in my dream
i thought u were mine to keep 
but nothings really what it seems 
everything is black and white 
so much shit that i can fix
the only coloured thing is lean

dirty sprite makes me feel fine
all this buzz man am so high
did i lose weight i feel light
do you still remember thst night

it haunts me to know w/ casperrr (cl6udy x yunny goldz)

shoutout @juzo for the cover art :) give him a follow pls

lyrics:

AUTUMN

(rest my arms)
(where they cannot ever be harmed)
(cold to the touch)

there's certain days where i haven't been better!
but when the sun goes down
i know tomorrow will be bitter
i've lost my head; when the clock struck ten
the blade came crashing down & now i'm back where i had started
could give a fuck if i'm dramatic,
the reward could be prestine
if i take the pills they offer me
my dreams could be serene
but i never wanted that; figmentated lies
to put on a public act, for their brainwashed minds

EPITOME

every day i wake up just to do the same shit over and over again
it gets hard to even stand up when i don’t know who i am
i thought you were a friend
but where were you in the end
i see it’s all just pretend
now my wounds they won’t even mend
th-th-th-they won’t mend
nothing feels real 
am i fucking ghost
cant take time to heal
so i’ll put the knife up to my throat
just to see if i’m alive
and if i’m not than what am i?

spotify :)

my wounds won’t mend w/ autumndropsdead (itamii)

(chorus)

you said you needed time away from
but i don’t wanna leave your side 
abandoned and hopeless
is all that i am 
when i don’t have you in my life
you can use me up however you see fit
just know that the damage you’ve cause was permanent 
you poisoned my soul
i’ve never felt so bitter and broken and alone

(verse)

and now my brains in conflict with itself
and you don’t know that you’re putting me through this hell
and every little thing you did was for yourself
but that’s okay 
i wouldn’t have it any other way
anything to just get you to stay
because don’t know if i can live life without you
and if i could i would but i don’t think i know how to

(bridge)

i don’t know how to live
i feel rigor Mortis setting in
in my cold dead lifeless limbs
 
(chorus)

you said you needed time away from
but i don’t wanna leave your side 
abandoned and hopeless
is all that i am 
when i don’t have you in my life
you can use me up however you see fit
just know that the damage you’ve cause was permanent 
you poisoned my soul
i’ve never felt so bitter and broken and alone

i’ve never felt so bitter, broken, and alone (discent x R3DQX)

(EPITOME)

(nothing but to left to rot away for a long time cause you broke me down now i’m on the ground do you feel me now i don’t want to feel anything anymore)

what is this plain of existence?
i don’t really feel like i’m living
everyday seems like the same
and i’m left with nothing but the pain 
that you left me with 
do you know i’m on my knees
begging for you
just to come back to me

livin this life has left me feelin hollow
and i don’t really know if i’ll be here by tomorrow
you’ll probably need to dig in the dirt, in the burrows
just to find my body be prepared to feel the sorrow
when there’s nothing left of me
just lay my corpse underneath the trees

(SLENDR)

li-li-living in a forrest 
i can never forget 
your lies
i know that i’m cold
frozen and alone
could you come and save me please
i’m bleeding my skin is ripping
burning sensation
i love you but your hearts temptation
is getting to me

(HERO)

i’d rather not see your funeral given it’s easier that way
ok i liked dying once but the second time just wasn’t the same

piss off
i know that we’ll never be the same thing that you were
never that’s the only word that really scares me
but don’t worry i’m at peace with it now
i get over it quick cause i have to or i breakdown 

(and i can sense your intentions i don’t need to read your mind yet i’m fine with it and still i’ve never been that sure why)

(EPITOME)

(it’s getting to me as i watch you leave 
for the very last time and i’m saying goodbye)

say goodbye to the life
that we used to know
you did this you broke our home
sitting here frozen in snow (frozen in snow)
i don’t have a home

words from the broken w/ im_slendr & hero (sorrow bringer)

i’ve been going insane
worrying about you everyday
and i’m not sure if i can continue 
the struggle in my brain has become an issue
and how do i know that you’re telling the truth this time
the-the-the consequences of your untold lies
will lead me to my direct demise 
will you still feel for me when i die?
cause i won’t be the one that you forget 
yeah you’ll regret
leaving me alone 
broken down on the ground
alone and forgotten 
dead and rotting 

(AUTUMN)

dead and rotting, my blood is clotting i'll
lay in a bed with a similar scent 
to the ones that are pinching my tongue
weight on my lungs
fat in my veins
begging the sun, to go away
what does he want? keep me awake 

i gotta answer questions time's creating
cold cause i'm dissociating fast

(2x)
the smoke and ash is all i need
life is fast, so leave me be

untold lies w/ autumndropsdead (itamii)

(intro)
i feel so stuck
won’t you let me go..

(chorus)
i feel stuck in place
i know that i’ve seen better days
i wanna run away 
but my feet planted in my grave 
i know that i can’t stay
holding on to memories 
it’s bad to contemplate
cause i feed lies into my brain

( post chorus)
i know u have to go
(u have to go)
but just know to me u were my home
(u were my home)

(verse)
now i’m shaking 
and i can’t fucking stop it 
my world is breaking 
apart and u were on it
when all i wanted was for u to be honest
i’ll close my eyes as i beg for u to stop it

(bridge)
my bones have decayed with the winter
but still i feel her

(chorus)
i feel stuck in place
i know that i’ve seen better days
i wanna run away 
but my feet planted in my grave 
i know that i can’t stay
holding on to memories 
it’s bad to contemplate
cause i feed lies into my brain

( post chorus)
i know u have to go
(u have to go)
but just know to me u were my home
(u were my home)

i know u have to go (hero)

prod. sorrow bringer
artwork done by my gf :)

you broke me down was it worth it?

you broke me down was it worth it?
i’m breaking beneath the surface
waiting for a higher purpose
but i know that’s worthless
i fear not for the end
i know that i’ll be fine
cause i’m the after life 
i know that you’ll still be mine
i’m letting go of the past cause it was flawed by desgin

failed from the fucking beginning 
they were out to get me
but i ended up winning
so i’ll sit back and wait
while you take your place
fucking your lying games
you’re such a fucking waste time for me
now it’s time for you to see

you broke me beneath the surface
you’ll soon realize how worthless 
you were to me
i can finally breathe
i was on my knees 
begging for you to leave
my life for good this time
well it seems i finally got what’s mine

nothing can change my mind
nothing can help you now
watch as the blood drips down
from your eyes
while you cry
no surprise 

you broke me beneath the surface
you’ll soon realize how worthless 

you broke me beneath the surface
you’ll soon realize how worthless 
you were to me
i can finally breathe
i was on my knees 
begging for you to leave
my life for good this time
well it seems i finally got what’s mine

broken beneath the surface (sorrow bringer)

shoutout to everyone in this song ily all :) <3
prod. sorrow bringer (goat)
mix: epitome, kanashi, autumn, casperrr
master: epitome

EPITOME:

if you look into my blackened soul 
you’ll see i’ve begun to decompose 
and with nothing but a rope around my neck
i’ll hang in the gallows dead
hold back the tears you’ll shed
leave all the words unsaid
i was hanging on by a thread
it’s better off instead 
that i’m 6 feet deep beneath the surface
i’ve said this once i know i’m worthless
i fall short of being perfect 
can you show me that i’m worth it
am i worth saving?
my body’s decaying
my flesh is rotting 
i feel like a zombie
i think the ends approaching
i feel it upon me
now i know i’m not worth saving 
i’m trying but it doesn’t seem to be enough
no one gives a fuck
i don’t even know what i’ve become
(can you tell me what i’ve become i give in too easy oh the end has just begun)

KANASHI:

Ion even know what I’ve become 
shits got me so fucked up…
And pls don’t wake me 
I’m busy taking a break from life
Ion wanna be a part of this anymore 
One foot in and the other out the door 
Cuz nothing lasts forever 
So just toss me like a wrapper on the floor…

AUTUMN:

i can't tell tonight apart from all them in the past
i can speak, i can breathe, but my brain is gonna gache
if you feed off of me, hope you like consuming trash
waking up inside this bed 
is something i'd rather not have
i'm tearing at my skin
could it get much worse than this
that's the only thing i'd ask
besides when you'll text me back

CASPERRR:

don't you text me back 
please i don't wanna relapse
feel this agonizing pressure on my chest
i can't breathe,i can't eat i can't get no rest  

fucked up, over what u told me
u left and now i'm lonely 
got 5gs and smoked that whole shit, holy-moly
u really said i was ur only
that guy was just a homie 
and now im dyin slowly, lonely

epitomeoffailure x kanashi x autumndropsdead x casperrr - blackened soul (sorrow bringer)

prod. 2001

shoutout the homie skrwd <3

woah
in the silence i will drown
tonight 

i wish i knew it all before
how much it would’ve hurt when i hit the floor
but knowing me i would’ve just ignored 
everything the signs were pointing towards
i search around but i’m abandoned
everyone is gone and i don’t understand it 
i wasn’t needed around 
guess i’ll shut myself out
in the silence i’ll drown

in the silence i’ll drown tonight 
no one can save my life (save my life)
all i needed was a friend 
to come and pull me out of the quicksand 

SKRWD:

its been a while and i still feel abandoned
it comes to mind all the time, i cant stand it
every night i lie awake to reminders of the sound
maybe i wont feel a thing on the way down 
i dont get it
you never meant it
so whyd you wanna be the one who said it?
i dont get it
i dont get it
why say it if you never meant it?


i wish i knew it all before
how much it would’ve hurt when i hit the floor
but knowing me i would’ve just ignored 
everything the signs were pointing towards
i search around but i’m abandoned
everyone is gone and i don’t understand it 
i wasn’t needed around 
guess i’ll shut myself out
in the silence i’ll drown

(in the silence i’ll drown tonight no one can save my life)

in the silence i’ll drown w/ skrwd (2001)

this song is not mine, all rights belong to Currents, their label, and distributor 

Instrumental: https://youtu.be/zmIre3J1ojk

Currents spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5pqvAI85RMxL9K0xHvSwGu?si=FJwbbjQOQQGA58Y_kqlQcQ

LYRICS

All alone inside my head
All alone inside my head

To escape the thought of loneliness is to resist
There's no point to refuse this
Crawling toward something serious
I'm not trying to push you, I'm just too distant
Is this who you are?
'Cause it's not who I am
You can't make me change
I'm just a shell with no substance

Now I know that I'm all alone
And nobody will come to save me
This is how, how I fall apart
All alone with these nightmares in my head

In time the walls surround me
Decrepit fixtures on the shelf all fade from my memory
Trembling behind the mask
Devoid of anything resembling humanity
Always under pressure, I dissolve
Void in my vacancy
Buried underneath it all
In silence, I sink

Now I know that I'm all alone
And nobody will come to save me
This is how, how I fall apart
All alone with these nightmares in my head

All alone inside my head
All alone inside my head

I can't give myself to you further
For everything's so meaningless to me
I'll rip out your heart 'cause that's all I'm good for
I can't be your shepherd if I'm lost

Now I know that I'm all alone
And nobody will come to save me
This is how, how I fall apart
All alone with these nightmares in my head
Now I know that I'm all alone
And nobody will come to save me
Now I know that I'm all alone
All alone with these nightmares in my head

WRITTEN BY CURRENTS

how i fall apart (Currents cover)

the instrumental for this track was done by Brandon Hammond please give him a follow :) <3
YouTube channel Link: https://www.youtube.com/@TheDjentistXIII/featured
Instagram Link:
https://www.instagram.com/thedjentist/

cover art done by my lovely gf :)

LYRICS

a runaway lost in a memory
with no escape trapped inside a maze
nothing short of a reflection of what is me

so the glass it shatters all around me 
i cant find a way out
surrounded by the shards disguised as winter 
breathe in the dust as it overtakes me 
i haven’t a single doubt 
this path i’ve followed has led to my end

now i’ll see my fate unravel before my eyes
i threw away my disguise 
not knowing the lies would swallow me up
god knows that i should’ve gave up 
long before i had the chance to feel again

a memory stuck in the back of my head soon to be dead

I WILL FORGET YOU
FORGET YOU
BLEGH

now i’ll see my fate unravel before my eyes
i threw away my disguise 
not knowing the lies swallow me up
god knows i should’ve gave up
long before i had the chance to feel again

My Disguise

shoutout my homie for bein on this! @notaheroo

lyrics:

i’ve been drowning my sorrows in the bottom of bottles
she said i should relax and not to go full throttle 
baby just calm down and i’ll be gone by tomorrow
you say your heart has been hollowed

but have you looked at me lately?
i’m the one who needs a saving grace
her eyes they pierce so painfully
i see your face and i’m back in that place

they’ve left me with nowhere to go
i’ve been broken down and on my own
my shoulders are crushed from the weight of it all

and you’ve been laughing at me waiting for me to fall
and i lack the motivation to force myself to crawl
you held back information knowing that it’s your fault
clarification is shown behind the walls
a now known revelation planned to kill my soul

it’s hard not to fold 
underneath the mold
of what i was always told and what i’m feeling
the seasons are changing again

oh, changing again
oh, can you tell me where the times been?

(notahero)

can u hear me coming baby?
open up the front door
i know time is infinite
but i don’t think i got much more
my bones and back grow sore
u tell me i should fight
pain gets defied when i look up in ur eyes
sorrow gets diffused into energy all u gotta do is fight
it’s hard enough waking up
be my saving grace tonight
anxiety riddles me when i feel my lungs fucking up
the pressure belittle me when i don’t think that i’m blowing up
but riddle me this baby
how come i ain’t never show no signs of giving up?

full throttle w/ notahero (R3DQX x Luffy)

prod. metlast x sor
mix: me
master: teddyboi (@yoimn3ver)
art: my girlfriend <3

lyrics:

close, but i can’t finish it
just know, that i don’t wanna be close tonight
when im at home, i feel the pain sink in
bottle after bottle after bottle down my throat 

know, that i can’t let go, this simply
of something that took time to put together
but clearly these bonds have been severed

don’t get too close, you’ll let the pain in
frost lands on my nose, it’s come im shaking
she knows, that she shouldn’t get close
but it’s freezing 

3 in the morning
i should be sleeping but im not
this anxiety has got its grip on me
this is something you won’t see
cause you’re caught up in a dream
so far away from the disease
im begging im down im on my knees
for someone to save me
but no one’s here lately 

close, but i can’t finish it
just know, that i don’t wanna be close tonight
when im at home, i feel the pain sink in
bottle after bottle after bottle down my throat

know, that i can’t let go, this simply
of something that took time to put together
but clearly these bonds have been severed

don’t get too close, you’ll let the pain in
frost lands on my nose, it’s come im shaking
she knows, that she shouldn’t get close
but it’s freezing

now you see me
now you don’t
now i’m gone and missing
you shouldn’t have gotten close

close (metlast x sor)

prod R3DQX

paperthinwalls:

somebody give me a sign
sick of wasting my time
feel like i’m rotting my mind
you take it all away from me

from me to you
deceive that’s what you do
believe, that i knew
those teeth you lie through

you can have this heart cause it’s broken
i wanna leave words unspoken
but the clock keeps on ticking 
already 12:25 in the evening 
and i know that you just wanna leave me
leave me, leave me alone 

epitome:

leave me alone 
i’m not gonna pick up the phone
there’s no one even home
my minds been gone since so long ago

i’ve lost control
i’m trapped inside a hole
that i dug for myself now i already know
that my fate is sealed in the void
and that’s something i can’t avoid
there’s no use to reaching out
for anyone’s help
just know that this was never my choice

brain dead at 12 in the morning
i’ll fake death just so everyone forgets me
(but i’m) still here growing mold like the flooring
my forgetten story

and there’s no sense to re-write this
my ignorance was the catalyst 
the reason, i was lost in the abyss
hoping i would never be missed
blood runs from my face to my chin
dripping down, the sirens’ sound
this is the end..

i’ll still let go so, darker and colder
i will not know, what crying on a shoulder 
feels like…

i have no mouth, but i must scream w/ paperthinwalls (R3DQX)

prod. metlast x 5head
w/ teddyboi 
master: teddyboi  (@yoimn3ver)

lyrics:

i forgot on these lonley nights
that i won’t see you by my side
not anymore 
but you’ll still find me holding onto your
memory
but i won’t let this be the end of me

so cold, she knows 
i’m out here growing mold 
ashes floating in the air burned up from a story that went untold
but where did this fire come from?
it’s not in my soul
my desires are coming undone
i’ve lost control

teddyboi:

everybody telling me i’ve lost control
frankly i don’t wanna believe that no, no
girlfriend yelling at me over the phone
god damn, here we go again
arguments, wanna fight like that?
i don’t text back no, not like that
and even though i wanna kill you, girl i still say it back
yeah you push me away but forget i’m attached 
and maybe 
maybe that shit is the problem 
keep a bottle and a 9mm finna solve ‘em
too lonely babe it’s suicide when you’re calling
you know i don’t like to talk at all
or even think
so why’d you leave me here alone 
coping with this drink
woke up, you left, i died in a dream
percocet got me worried bout the way that i breathe
you tell me that you’re scared you don’t want me to go to sleep
you put me in this position where i can’t even breathe


i forgot on these lonley nights
that i won’t see you by my side
not anymore 
but you’ll still find me holding onto your
memory
but i won’t let this be the end of me

so cold, she knows 
i’m out here growing mold 
ashes floating in the air burned up from a story that went untold
but where did this fire come from?
it’s not in my soul
my desires are coming undone
i’ve lost control

epitomeoffailure & teddyboi - these lonley nights (metlast x 5head)

produced by sorrow bringer

mixed by me

mastered by teddyboi

art by my lovely girlfriend <3

lyrics:

(go away from me now, i don’t wanna see your face)

go away from me 
i don’t wanna see your face again 
don’t you think that you can erase and or amend
cause the damage is already done

you took advantage and had your fun
don’t you think the time has come
for you to let go
the soul owes no bonds so lose control

but the memory won’t fold 
i’ve been losing sleep and growing old
it’s been fuckin weeks and it’s been cold
my rooms been stinkin’ foul from the mold

everybody ask me how
how i even do this
frankly i just push along and don’t think i’m an artist
faintly i’ll just make a song and don’t think i’m a above this

go away from me 
i don’t wanna see your face again 
don’t you think that you can erase and or amend
enemies always start out as friends

once dear to me 
it should’ve been clear to see
but in this fog i couldn’t recognize your face
the feeling of the shock it put me in my place 
i hate the taste 

go away from me 
i don’t wanna see your face again 
go away from me 
i don’t wanna see your face again 
i know you think that you can erase and or amend
but you can’t so just accept

go away from me 
i don’t wanna see your face again 
don’t you think that you can erase and or amend
it’s time this ends

(random mumbled gibberish lol)

go away (sorrow bringer)

prod. Shiki XO
mastered: nate2timez
mix: me
art: my lovely girlfriend :)
lyrics: 

i was walking alone on a road
when i didn’t have anywhere to go
my heart always feels so god damn cold
cause i’m always on my own
i can see the clouds gather in my heart
they shroud the person that i was
and tear my my mind apart

now, there is nothing left for me here 
   (there ain’t nothing left for me here)
so how do run away and disappear?
   (how do i run away and disappear?)

no one could tell me the answers i needed
even if i yelled, begged, and pleaded
all i could think of is the way i was treated
so egregious, every day just repeated
i was stuck in the same cycle over and over
but you didn’t fucking care
you just sat there hungover
   (didn’t fucking care about me)
you sink even lower
you’ve lost your composure 
your breath is fucking foul
i can tell your not sober

(ohh i can tell your not sober)
ohh

now, there is nothing left for me here 
   (there ain’t nothing left for me here)
so how do run away and disappear?
   (how do i run away and disappear?)
the lines are blurred between you and i
so now i don’t know if i should go or die
so how do run away and disappear?
   (how do i run away and disappear?)

how do i disappear? (Shiki XO)

produced: tiedforsilver
feat: greenwood 
artwork: my amazing gf <3

lyrics:

( i would give anything to walk by your side again, alone my hands are trembling and i would make the sun drown)

i would give anything
to walk by your side again
the loneliness is dragging me 
further in the dark and now i cannot pretend 
that i can take the suffering
when your not around i’d rather be dust in the wind
alone my hands are trembling
i would make the sun drown to bring you back my friend

(greenwood)

keep you safe, i don't know if i can manage
i whip it fast, sip it slow, its fucking static
guess you were right, never more than just an addict
i compensate, i overdo it fucking manic

all of that in my life though
i just really wanna go home
call you drunk from your friends phone
straight passing out at the dial tone
i don't what this life's worth
guess i don't see what you see (don't know what you mean)
nothing ever came easy when i'm face down in the deep

compensate i never get it right
run it different in my head like just the other night
see the mist and all the people on the other side
i know you're there and i don't even have to wonder

(epitome)

i do not have the time, nor a good alibi 
to explain why, how nothings been going right
i could roll the dice, but that would waste the time
of you and i, no need to try to chance it now

this loneliness as left a frown
on my face, it’s dragging me down
to the ground, now underneath where i can’t even hear a sound

i would give anything
to walk by your side again
the loneliness is dragging me 
further in the dark and now i cannot pretend 
that i can take the suffering
when your not around i’d rather be dust in the wind
alone my hands are trembling
i would make the sun drown to bring you back my friend

i would make the sun drown w/ greenwood (tiedforsilver)

prod. secre swallowtail x heyrick
feat. casperrr & shizukesa.
art. my friends cat LOL

lyrics:

(please just tell me now, that you would hear the sound, of my voice calling out, so that i can be found)

and i can feel my heart sink in the rain now
so cold thinkin that i might breakdown
feelin lost, feelin lonley, and nobody’s around
and in this storm the waters rising and i think i might drown
please just tell me now, that you would hear the sound
of my voice calling out, so that i can be found

please just tell me now, that you would hear the sound
of my voice calling out, so that i can be found
but no matter how many times i might scream
it doesn’t mean ur any closer to finding me
so now ur looking for a ghost
just give up you’ll never be close

(please just tell me now, u r looking for a ghost)

(caspy)

nana~
can you help me now
pick me up from the ground
i hate loving in doubt
cuz that's when shit goes south

used to look for some1 like u
now i don't have a clue 
of what the fuck i should
to try and forget u

(shizu)

thoughts fadin like the blood on my palm
she saying shit the same well bitch im already gone
guess all the friends change
cuz they dk what im on
suicidal lil prick im jus a dick of a cunt
just a pussy n**** i quit talkin
steady smoking until hittin coughin
ion need help 2 know im the problem
bullet to the dome woulda solved em
only fuck around inside of FL but by next album im offing me
and honestly, been so sick of the calling me
like fuck out of my head

my heart sinks in the rain w/ casperrr & shizukesa. (secre swallowtail x hey rick)

produced: metlast x itamii
featuring: @breckenford & @user-642636378 (halfhearted)
art made with Imagine AI Art Generator (https://www.imagine.art/dashboard)


lyrics: (i’ll have them soon)

no help, no sympathy w/ brecken & halfhearted (metlast x itamii)

i'll be found w/ Tameron (ushanka boy)

produced by ushanka boy
featuring NAVYXOWER (@navyxower)
mixed by navy & epitome
mastered by teddyboi (@yoimn3ver)

lyrics

well…
i don’t know why but it feels like
i’ve been here forever 
been seeing star signs layered through the sky
that lead me back to december

those cold lonely nights
drove me to insanity 
i didn’t put up a fight
for you and that drives me crazy 

what the hell was every supposed to do
i didn’t have a clue
this shit left us confused
but that’s okay we’ll work it out
there’s no need to cry now
wipe your tears, i love the sound
of your voice there’s nothing that

could replace you
you’ve always been the one i choose
there’s nothing left for me to lose
so you have to know these feelings are true

NAVY

baby i could do it better yeah i swear to beup at night i see you walking past my house theres plentyplenty times where i need you in my bed with mewhy is life never really even fair to mebring me back to another timeanother era another life  where i can say i feel alirghttime goes by really fast in the nightand when your with the ones you love the most, time just really flysfly carefullyi pray to god ill see you eventaullyi miss everything you said to mei hate goodbyes theyre not meant for me



well, i don’t know why but it feels like
i’ve been here forever 
been seeing star signs layered through the sky
that lead me back to december

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