took me a bit to make this, but it was a ton of fun to experiment with some new sounds. s/o hero for teaching me about formant shifting /o/ 
I'm gonna try and release 2 songs next month, no guarantee though c:

lyrics:

I would lift your head when the water’s high
I would wrap your hands when you’re cold at night
lay flat on the ground so I break your fall
And I would be alright
I wouldn’t mind at all
I would move the sun when it blinds your sight
I would shoulder your weight and still stand upright
mutilate my body if my skin’s not right for you
if you were by my side 
I’d die for you
  
So I tear myself apart everyday that’s fine
I know that every piece ends up entwined
with my hands tracing slowly up up spine
sewing threads so tight they won’t unwind
I

wanna know
have you ever tried to be
anything more than what you’re trying to be
need to know 
if you’ve ever tried to see
everything that I can see

I could be a shipwreck washed ashore
I could be approaching meteors
I could be somebody’s last resort
Did I ever tell you that
that

Iiiii
will love you like I know to
castle in the sky 
baby I think we should float too
I’m barely alive
but for you I wanna pull through
if you were my ride or die
there’d be so much I could show you

I would lift your head when the water’s high
I would wrap your hands when you’re cold at night
lay flat on the ground so I break your fall
And I would be alright  
I wouldn’t mind at all
I would move the sun when it blinds your sight
I would shoulder your weight and still stand upright
mutilate my body if my skin’s not right for you
if you were by my side
I’d die for you

I could be a shipwreck washed ashore
I could be approaching meteors
I could be somebody’s last resort
Did I ever tell you that before?

break your fall (empty roads)

Prod, me

Why're you leavin? Please don't leave me
When I need you, you don't need me
Why do I keep thinking that I could pretend
That I'm someone else

You're the reason the rest don't feel right
I kinda stopped eating, I did for a while
And I always take defense when they tell I should accept a goodbye
How to get by?

Come see my life
I mourn all the time
Hurt my own feelings
You were one of a kind
The day that you've died
Felt I was going through hell
Nobody ever compares
So who am I to even try?
How to get by?

You're the reason the rest don't feel right
I kinda stopped eating, I did for a while
And I always take defense when they tell I should accept a goodbye
How to get by?

Big dreams, looking up, looking up to heaven
Anxiety keeps holding back, hold back by the devil
Get that shot gun out the barrel
I'm fighting 'til I'm settled
Find a path that leads me back to you, or it drives me mental
I'm way too sentimental, I'm a man, no time for love and for candles
You left me on pending

You're the reason the rest don't feel right
I kinda stopped eating, I did for a while
And I always take defense when they tell I should accept a goodbye
How to get by? x2

how to get by

abstractions and vignettes of emotion and experience, i hope you enjoy

all beats by elijah david: https://www.youtube.com/@ElijahDavid_

thank you to notahero and shizukesa for helping complete some tracks and provide a unique perspective to the emotions i've felt

atleastitsrainin with notahero [prod elijah david]

beat - @wraithontheporch
feat - @wraithwilldie
master - @iamaneerdowell

lyrics:

watch it all fall to dust
the reality has crumbled of somebody that i used to love
looking at the time
its 2 in the night
look up at the sky damn
i just wanna die brain thinking suicide
imma dodge responsibilities cuz i dont wanna try
i dont really ever think that you could see shit from my eyes
cuz we live 2 different lives
on some real shit i think yours is just way easier than mine
i dont wanna say my feelings i'll just tell u that im fine

baby I don’t wanna try
i don’t wanna know what I’ll find when time spent
turns to my whole life went by
i don’t wanna close these eyes
every second chance I let slip by
every fucking moment I let die
how can I forgive myself tonight?

watch it all fall to dust
the reality has crumbled of somebody that i used to love
looking at the time
its 2 in the night
look up at the sky damn
i just wanna die brain thinking suicide
imma dodge responsibilities cuz i dont wanna try
i dont really ever think that you could see shit from my eyes
cuz we live 2 different lives
on some real shit i think yours is just way easier than mine
i dont wanna say my feelings i'll just tell u that im fine

could never put urself in my shoes cuz u cant afford them ft. wraithwilldie (prod. wraithontheporch)

lyrics

are you really sorry, i don't believe it
i've been out on the road, catching feelings
watch me lose my fucking mind
girl, i'm drinking all the time
i said i'm going to change my life
i guess we both like to lie

i don't think it's the same, girl, i'm trying to drown my pain
you're just sinking in the sorrow, that is not my fate
girl, i've lived enough for you
don't want to die just because it's true love
yeah, that just sums it up

what control do i got when i'm in your void?
you cut me up to bits and pieces, i'm just like your toy
are you not bored of this?
because i'm sick of this
i wasn't born for this
this is what they mourn for

you can heal up, if you wanted to
you're powerful
i know it's all love, deep inside of you
but i'm warning you
if you take this path, you better see it through
many lives have suffered when they're stunned to move

that's enough
i've suffered enough
we've suffered enough
trust me, i know, in these seas it gets stormyit gets rough
hurts at first, but there is beauty in this stuff
look up to the saints, and they will guide you through the mud

sinking

sinking (thesoundclown)

produced by hero <3
mastered by neerdowell <3

I like this track a lot :)

Lyrics
- - - - -
I’ve gone through everything at least a thousand times (a thousand times)
Why don’t you tell me what you mean and save the time (and save the time)
I threw apologies, as if they weren’t mine (so wastefully)
And after everything you said, you weren’t mine (Just make-believe)

I remember the good times
I remember the bad
All the things we would talk of
How u hated your dad
All the plans for the future
How I’m happy I knew u
I was talking right through you
Now you don’t message back

Hand in hand
You led me back
To lands where in
You left me stranded
I’m the puppet
My heart manned it
I cant go against demands its

Not up to me
So baby spin that fantasy
I’ll lose all reality
As long as you keep feeding it

I love when you deceive me
Love it when you need me
Greed is the poison
That seeps from my needle
Feeble and weakened
Dead by the weekend
Toss and I turn to return to my grieving

Leave me for the graves
Fall into decay
Not another way
And that’s okay
I don’t need to be 
More than memory
Behind your faces
Replaced with
The next one on the chopping block
The places
Vacations
Maybe that’ll rid me from your brain
It’s escaping
Every fucking step you’ve ever taken
Piece of your creation
A mangled demonstration
Of coping in this matrix  
Hoping there's a day
Where we make it to oasis

I’ve gone through everything at least a thousand times (a thousand times)
Why don’t you tell me what you mean and save the time (and save the time)
I threw apologies, as if they weren’t mine (so wastefully)
And after everything you said, you weren’t mine (Just make-believe)


make believe (hero)

autumn_freestyle w/ yungcray + epitomeoffailure + wraith

prod hollowprpl
guitar by me

lyrics


hes gone now
and all he ever wanted was to be loved
can u calm down 
lately girl i know im messing up
oh im pissed now
and i can only focus what ive done
im a bitch now
i dont think it matters anymore
shut the fuck up
i dont wanna talk about this now
i just thrown up
like 2 or three times , im coming down
im just a no one 
and ill be nothing until im dirt
theres blood in my snot
and in my lungs and it fucking hurts

it costs me my life
cuz i cant be sane again here in my mind
im alone
i see the sympathy die by the window
i really miss what we had
am i too cold?

the constants in my life arent constant anymore 
between you and me im not sober no more
i can die freely, id have no remorse
the meaning of life is to love and mines no more 
oh im horrible

hes gone now
and all he ever wanted was to be loved
can u calm down 
lately girl i know im messing up
oh im pissed now
and i can only focus what ive done
im a bitch now
i dont think it matters anymore
shut the fuck up
i dont wanna talk about this now
i just thrown up
like 2 or three times , im coming down
im just a no one 
and ill be nothing until im dirt
theres blood in my snot
and in my lungs and it fucking hurts

it’s not your fault. [swan dive] (hollowprpl x ash.)

hate it when my feelings creep up like a nightmare
i swear
i aint mean to do it like i did but it was something I could fight for
we have memories that i would die for 100 times over if you let me
1000 lightyears away
but theres still something that im holding
time stops when i see ur face now
i dont wanna see that no more
it only made feel im not worth it
it only made me feel like you were bored
when you talked to me was it something that you wanted
or was it nothing of the sort
all i know is that you slammed me out the door
and ever since being happy been a chore
its not a miracle if i cant make it back to you
And im so sorry that i did just what i had to do
Had to add up to the list i got of bad news
but when you hear it you dont hear it how youre meant to
used to wear me like a life vest
til the excuses came intruding i cant digest
and when its folding over i find a new sidequest
i hope it hold me over until you get my text

i press record and then i take my first sip
im not ignoring you im just tryna fix this mix
im flying off this keef dust like a pixie
im falling down inside the void like are you with me
trust fall
ill give you my all
i could write a song in 20 minutes but in your face i stall
cause finding all the right words too hard
with love from my broken heart
lets live together we could build a house thats right under the stars
swear youre more beautiful now that i know who you are
im all rusted up can you please replace my broken parts
im so fucked up cant cry but if i could id cry a lot
they already know whats good whenever i walk into the spot
me and brecken so high were in outer space like kirk and spock
were just stepping on them like a pair of birkenstocks
we gon get big money like wap
im just trickshotting like cod
should out gray shout out amo
they my brothers let me put you on
wonder where i been for the past few days just sat back rapping smoking runtz
they already know where i be at in the party im quiet sipping mud
i stick to myself i dont feel the same i run from everyone

nothing of the sort (p. under the maple tree)

Rise Of The Misfit


nothing lasts forever but we're making the most
album coming soon

atleastitsrainin with notahero [prod elijah david]

melmige

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