very pretty friend, just now finding you!

take my heart <3

produced by pekarot

completely non profit

lyrics

she said hold me
but i cant promise ill feel it im seeing stars 
is it haunting
that theres no pain from a blade if its sharp enough
and the gauze sits tight over covered scars
but its damp with blood and it smells of rot
sweat soaked nights in a bricked out yard
with my carved up fingers spilling fat n tar
and im barely concious but ill never yawn
as i stare straight faced at this silent dawn
and im such a sucker for a pretty face
when she looks at me i just melt n place
signals sent are so badly mixed
as my head is empty like a bedroom sit
and i write these songs when im feeling sick
cause a state of panic is how i exist

so i numb myself and try to take away the things that make me care

dont pretend u were there

my heart beats heavy hidden in my chest
n i feel the blood flow out the wound in my neck
n ive said this before but ur face drags the air from my chest 
if u laid me down id do the rest
please do not fret

honestly? im still miserable
but its not ur fault, we were both involved
and i am not but a shit-stained mark
on her polaroids of a bedroom wall

so i sit and i just drink myself to death again for one more night

ima fuck up my life 

i just hate the fact im tired all the god damn time

bell's line of road (pekarot)

A reimagined Version of 9tails’ “I’m still learning”
prod. Sorrowbringer

I'm Still Learning. (cover)

www.carlbymusic.com
Featuring @burylilac
Production, mixing, mastering & additional vocals by @horoshavibes
Additional guitars by @jolst

LYRICS
Rock bottom
Lower than I’ve ever been
Only hanging on for the sake of my friends
‘Cause I got people who depend on me
And a couple bad habits like dependency

I worry ‘bout my mom
How she’d get on without me
I wonder a lot if you’d still think about me
Only hanging on just to spite those who doubt me
So throw me a rope because I feel like I’m drowning

I’m running out of ways to say this
I hate who I’ve been
Need to make changes
I’ve lost all motivation
Along with my patience
Too long I have waited

I’m running out of ways to say
That I hate myself
Wish that I could change
I think it’s for the best
You and I stay estranged
You wouldn’t recognize the shell I’ve become these days

(lilac heart)
Rock bottom
I’m running out of ways to say
I miss the way you’d get under my skin
Breaking bottles broken glass
Is all that’s left of my ‘lil head
I don’t even know where all the time went

I fell asleep in the snow
And woke up burning on the sidewalk
Take this away before I hurt someone
Try to cover the pain
The broken shards are showing through the holes I burnt into my sleeves

Listen on Spotify!

Rock Bottom w/ lilac heart (Prod. Horosha & Jolst)

as real as it gets

A bootleg of Moonbeam by Goldielocks.

Check out the original here!
https://soundcloud.com/goldielockstunes/moonbeam

GOLDIELOCKS - MOONBEAM (GUARDIN BOOTLEG)

surgeon

i was lonely ft. safehold

i hope we can both get better :(

✨ Polar ✨
💎 @polar333 💎
💎 www.instagram.com/ihatepolar/ 💎
💎 twitter.com/ihatepolar/ 💎

✨ PraYer ✨
💎 @prayermusic 💎
💎 https://www.instagram.com/prayer.music/ 💎

✨ Roan ✨
💎 @lil-boso 💎
💎 www.instagram.com/whoisroan/ 💎

✨ nevrfall ✨
💎 @nevrfall 💎
💎 https://www.instagram.com/nevrfall/ 💎

✨ Business Inquires ✨
💎 polar333.official@gmail.com 💎💎

move on w/ roan & praYeR (prod. nevrfall)

Lyrics:

Dear Santa Claus,
Don't know if you hear me at all
But all I want
Is to find somebody that will love my flaws
When I find that someone
I'll never let them go
Having someone to hold...
That's better than gold

Time keeps passing by and by
Wrote so many letters but I don't know why
Last year I wanted to die
That was 'til I saw her eyes
Through the window, she said come outside
Don't wanna be alone during Christmas time
She warm me up, and my heart was like an icicle
That's why I want her
I don't wanna go through this alone
I was at a loss for words
Now I don't want anybody else but her
Been bad in the past, but I promise I learned
Know I wrote so many letters
I just hope that you heard
She's the only one on my wishlist
When I'm around her, gotta wear weights
'Cause I'm on the ceiling, she got me on the ceiling
Don't need no presents on Christmas
All I really need is my Mrs.

move on w/ roan & praYeR (prod. nevrfall)

polar

Recent comments

347-XIMENNA-23

sin

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