when my dreamscape and my reality starts blurring what is really real anymore?

consider this ghoul in tokyo pt 2

i put a lot of work into this project and i hope you enjoy
also shoutout the amazing producer sorrow bringer
extra sound design and effects by me

this is my art and what i wanna make

- mars

ps this was heavily influenced by sewer

hellscape

personal favorite song ive made in awhile

produced by. sorrow bringer x luffysome 

lyrics;

shes still on my mind n shes flawless 
she got me obesessed with seeing her topless
but i rather listen to you talk more or less
and those beautiful eyes i got lost in

she wrote a song for me the first time when she fell for me
tried to warn me, but I still fell under her spell
that was her siren's call, and I loved that song
wasted all of fall, now those days are gone
jus for u to block me 
wishing for something, anything at all
i jus wanna be friends
i jus want u in my life
i wanna make peace
i cant stand to have things be this way

do you ever feel the same
is there a way to ever feel okay
because everything in my brain is breaking down 
im not 
im not worth saving

shes still on my mind n shes flawless 
she got me obesessed with seeing her topless
but i rather listen to you talk more or less
and those beautiful eyes i got lost in

play my life like a game and i know its a gamble
i wish i knew the stakes, i know i fucked up
i know i have these mistakes, that haunt me
but wait, do u finally understand, 
that this isnt the man i am

shes still on my mind n shes flawless 
she got me obesessed with seeing her topless
but i rather listen to you talk more or less

flawless

hellscape (intro)

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
its cold, i cant feel my hands
killing another man
that wasnt apart of the plan
but fuck here i am
washing the blood of my hands
i took the last thing that made me human
now im fading back into being a demon
babygirl gimmie a reason to stay
if not ima jus drift away
ion even wanna be awake

oh my god 
smoking all night long
i wont ever stop
its the only thing im good at
the only thing i want

atleast fight back x 5

fffightback (interlude)

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
its been 45 days since i got fucked up
its been 59 days since i got drunk
doing this for my health and i hate it
jus like jelly said sobriety sucks
i like the feeling of being fucked up
it helps with know ill never be enough

i wake up and wish i could jus go back to sleep
even when i record 50 songs a week
i still feel like im just a sheep
everyone says its not that deep

beingsoberfkingsucks

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
4am on this porch i sit here and smoke
until everything i love turn to ash
off this ket but it doesnt nothing but numb my past pain
take my soul and heart and toss it out into the rain
watch me bleed, babe im on my knees
sending you messsage after message knowing you wont read
listen to my pleads, listen to me

i cant look anyone in the face
im ashamed of who i am
i'm not the man i wanna be
and i dont wanna force you to love me
but without you in my life it feels empty
and every single thing feels tempting
i jus wanna be existing

the truth is hard to swallow
been awhile since i was down this low
ive never felt this hollow
i'm trying to get fucked up so i'm trying to hit it from my bong
i used to have potential but everyone tells me im lost
i don't know what todo or where i belong
fear the worst because you know im cursed
and fuck this shit ill say it again it fucking hurts
cancel all my plans
drop everything just so i could get fucked up and play games
everything i do to numb the pain
it wont help me escape
it makes everything fade away
take everything take my soul
just let me waste away
these new meds are supposed to work
but fuck

i cant look anyone in the face
im ashamed of who i am
i'm not the man i wanna be
and i dont wanna force you to love me
but without you in my life it feels empty
and every single thing feels tempting
i jus wanna be existing

hollow

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
i got alot going on in my head
i'm sorry i lied
but i swear im doing better lately
started playing guitar & picked up my keyboard
i started going to therapy
now i'm trying to learn music theory
its not much but its a start
its a start for me
this is my dream
and it keeps me from losing sleep
i write song after song
no matter how deep
no matter what any believes
this is me and what my story

i'm not sure about this anymore
i'm tired i wanna give up
i guess i finally got what i asked for
i'm sick and tired
i' dont wanna do this anymore
i'm not sure about this anymore

whats the point of waking up
whats the point of not giving up
whats the point of falling when ur up
like damn, im living my life
i'm sitting online
i'm trying to not cry
everything will last
and im tired of falling apart

6 words echo in my head
i can't let the pain win
demons are knocking
but i cant let them in
i lose my fucking mind
every god damn night
im okay, im alright

i'm not sure about this more
i'm tired i wanna give up
i guess i finally got what i asked for
i'm sick and tired
i' dont wanna do this anymore


anymore (outro)

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;
why does he lie all the time
you have no friends as is it is
so whats another lie
its okay im fine
as i tell my third lie
and im breaking down my 5th line
im not me this isn't my soul on the inside
he died like last week

he survived arrow from afar
but now hes falling for her faster
look at him trying to cover his scars
he gave a girl his heart
and she ripped it apart
shes my bloody carver
she became the monster
match my breathing
give me 15 different reasons
candles light up the room
summon another demon
as the angels weep
is this another pipe dream
is another person thatll just leave
i dont wanna die
but im not doing alright
so ill just sit here and cry

why does he lie all the time
you have no friends as is it is
so whats another lie
its okay im fine
as i tell my third lie
and im breaking down my 5th line
im not me this isn't my soul on the inside
he died like last week

3rd lie

produced by @sorrow_bringer

lyrics;

\\
i try to get by,
than i get high
i feel like i wanna die
why would i wanna be alive

everytime we sin, than we sin again n i dont wanna
i stay up all night until i see the morning sun
maybe its time to look within
look at what ive become
either way this is no way to live
but baby your like my drug
  
yk im a fiend for this stuff
im trying to be a betterman
ik we are better off as friends
i honestly hate how things are 
but i pretend, 
give me 5 minutes before i descend into madness
you dont really know the dread and sadness

remember  how i told u i suck with attachments
but how i managed to get attached than
but once again i digress
filling myself up with stress
for what your with him
but im always the 2nd best
and i let it happen
why do i do this

everytime we sin, than we sin again n i dont wanna
i stay up all night until i see the morning sun
maybe its time to look within
look at what ive become
either way this is no way to live
but baby your like my drug
yk im a fiend for this stuff

i try to get by,
than i get high
i feel like i wanna die
if im not alright
why would i lie to you for tonight

would u jus change u dont like him
everytime we talk my life gets brighten
and everytime i hear the things he does
it makes me wanna fight him
im alone again, im gonna die alone again
phone calls help me get by
but

she got me locked down
i try to get by,
than i get high

everytime we sin, than we sin again n i dont wanna
i stay up all night until i see the morning sun
maybe its time to look within
look at what ive become
either way this is no way to live
but baby your like my drug
yk im a fiend for this stuff
//

sin again

single #1 off hellscape releasing 7/10

sewer used this beat and I never ended up making a song but found it on my pc so i made this today enjoy

produced by sorrowbringer 

album w/ hollowprpl on the 25th

& 

album w/ sorrow next month

lyrics;
ion wanna talk to this bitch im trying to roll this blunt
im not tryna talk wit this powerup in my cup
u say u hate me when im fucked up
but bitch this is who i am
im a different person everyone hates when im not on the drugs
if i fall asleep dont wake me up
plug hit my phone trying to dose me up
but im already fucked up

if i roll this blunt i dont think i can get anymore high
but i do it because if i dont ill lose my fucking mind
missed a text from my grandma i lost track of time
rather not talk about how i feel, im fine

u blocked me n u know damn well that i dont care
keep telling me im not being fair
than why the fuck are u still here
i'm not going outside im way to  fucked up  
im not going anywhere i dont give a fuck 
bitch are you dumb
its so cold out
my hands are going numb
ur so so selfish
bitch u never meant this
i was all up in her mouth like a denist

my hearts broken 
so i crush another pill
and do another line even tho you know it kills
keep going just to feel alive
keep your feelings inside
your not gonna die

roll this blunt

single #2 off hellscape releasing 7/10

produced by sorrow bringer

lyrics;

i know what happens
i know the aftermath
but im getting tired of fighting it
just let my body lay lifeless

im getting tired of fighting it
i feel everything in this room start to spin
like mars get a grip
is this it??
grab the beretta and unload the clip
way too many people around 
im so sick of this

isolate myself to lock the beast in
everything is out in the open
and im so over it
im falling back again
im drinking again
im smoking all the time
just so i dont gotta feel a thing
maybe i should bite the bullet
its all her fault
i never wanted to be your savior 
some how u became my biggest hater
tell everyone u hate me than your on the phone with me a hour later
ive been having nightmares
this isn't me talking baby
its jus the medicine in my bloodstream
im not angry
i do this to let off steam
im already afraid of everything
what do four words even mean
im sick of living
all my texts green
i haven't been this alone
but no one is hitting up my phone
im destroying myself until im no one
i dont wanna be alone

i say that as my lungs fill up with smoke
this is how i cope
somedays i feel the rope tied around my throat
and somedays i feel like im in my zone
last night in the whip listening to sewerperson im cold
than it switches to 9tails - miles
i haven't felt okay in awhile
when i get drunk again ill say sorry to my family and my friends
than ill disappear again
will anyone check on me at my lowest point
i dont think so, so why should i care
everyone acts annoyed but i asked for help

im getting tired of fighting it
i feel everything in this room start to spin
like mars get a grip
is this it??
grab the beretta and unload the clip
way too many people around 
im so sick of this

clip!

22 | vox/songwriter & engineer 

i make what i want my music isnt for everyone

email - m@scars.online

hellscape

marsmal